14-04-2017 03:49 PM
I don't know why I feel the way I do. Right now, I'm deciding on a post secondary institution. It's my dream to go to a really good college, but every step in getting there is overwhelming me. I feel like I need to give just a bit more to make it, but I have nothing left to give. But at the same time, if I don't get there I'll have let myself, my friends, and my family down.
Beside that, I don't want to be gay. All it does is add to an already difficult life. I guess I feel like self harm would be hitting two birds with one stone; I wouldn't have to worry about my sexuality or the disappointment of failure. I don't think about it a ton, but the thought is always in the back of my mind now and I'm worried that anything else in my life could be the straw that breaks the back.
15-04-2017 05:17 PM
Hi @downthelane, thank you for sharing with us how things have been for you. It sounds like there's a lot that's been going on, like coming out to your friend (which is really awesome and a big step!), then how things have been with your friend after coming out, and feeling overwhelmed about life after high school.
So I was wondering about (you don't have to answer these if you don't want to):
- the kind of support that you'd like to receive from your friend?
- your thoughts on his suggestion of seeing a professional for some extra support - or maybe contacting Q life/Kids Helpline?
- what you meant when you said that 'every step in getting there [to a really good college] is overwhelming me. Is this related to the studying to get into college?