Reply
Frequent scribe
Posts: 26
Registered: ‎19-12-2016

Alone

Do you ever feel like you are just passing through life barely?
I do.
Lately I've just felt sad like for weeks now.
I get this feeling like I'm just not doing well.
Like I'm making it but just barley in life.
I really tried my best to make a friend and it just doesn't seem to be working.
Like every time I try to talk to them they sort of avoid me...
It feels like I'm forever trying to tie up loose ends only for another to come undone.
I just feel alone a lot of the time.
I figured things would get easier when I got into adult hood but if anything they are more complicated and worse.
I'm trying my best to change myself ... but I just feel like a failure and a loser most of the time.
I struggle with people, I've always been a bit antisocial I go to scchool I come home I barley talk to anyone.
I'm just no good at any of this.
I have a party to go to and it's my sisters friend ... I feel like a third wheel like I don't even belong.
I know it may be silly but I'm fairly certain I only got invited because my sister did.
Also I hate crowds and there is gonna be a lot of people..
I'm afraid I'll stuff up and insult someone by accident.
I act all high and mighty and may come across as arrogant but really I'm shit scared of being rejected by people...
Sometimes I just hate myself.
Sigh so you have any tips for meeting people or solving any of this.
I just feel sort of stuck.
Mod Squad
Posts: 526
Registered: ‎09-05-2016

Re: Alone

Hey @AStudyInHuman 

 

Sorry to read that you've been struggling lately but I'm glad you've reached out to the RO community.

 

Maybe you might like to check out the Social Skills page on the RO website for some tips and advice for meeting new people and making friends?

 

Hang in there and keep the RO community updated with how you're managing.

 

Gen - RO

Mod
Posts: 2,156
Registered: ‎20-11-2013

Re: Alone

[ Edited ]

Hi @AStudyInHuman, it's sounds like you've got a lot of different emotions swirling around right now that are pretty hard to deal with, so I can completely understand how that would lead to feeling stuck. As counterintuitive as it seems you're not alone in feeling alone, as feelings of isolation can be quite common for transitional times in life like going into adulthood.

 

What sort of things do you enjoying doing and are passionate about? One great way of meeting new people is through volunteering and pursuing hobbies, so taking an activity you like to do or a cause that you're passionate about and finding like minded people might be a good first step. It tends to get some of the initial tension of meeting someone new out of the way because you've already got common ground of knowing you like some of the same things. How do you feel about that idea?

 

I'm a little concerned when you say you've been feeling sad for weeks now. Sadness is a healthy to go through, but when it's prolonged and effecting your life in a big way it's worth having a look into what's going on. Are you seeing a psychologist or counsellor at the moment?

Mod
Posts: 8,318
Registered: ‎10-08-2012

Re: Alone

I can definitely relate to a lot of those feelings @AStudyInHuman Smiley Sad it sounds like you've already been trying hard to make some friends and it hasn't quite happened yet, but unfortunately sometimes it can take a while to find the right group of people. Just because these people aren't the right fit doesn't mean you'll never find someone who thinks you're awesome. Even from reading this post it's evident that you're quite self-aware and want to improve yourself - two qualities that I know I certainly value in a friend Smiley Happy

 

I also just wanted to follow up on @Chessca_H's question - what sort of supports do you have at the moment? Chatting to a counsellor/psychologist can often be really helpful if the sadness doesn't seem to be going away

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ray, when you're on the Titanic, you load the lifeboats. You don't stop to yell at the iceberg.
Frequent scribe
Posts: 26
Registered: ‎19-12-2016

Re: Alone

Update sorry it took so long
About the party... I didn't even know I could feel this way.
I felt happy.
Happier than I had in a while.
I laughed..
I joked..
It was new and exciting and joyous.
Also people wanted me their... haha me?
I didn't know an environment could feel so warm.
Is this what it feels like when people actually want you around?
They were kind and understanding and I ended up getting some new friends on FaceBook.
I think I should get some counselling though thanks very much for the suggestion.. yeah I'm not myself like I used to be.
I used to laugh a lot more and sing a lot more and generally was nothing like I am now..
I won't put my hopes up but maybe things will eventually work out..
I'm feeling optimistic.
For once.
Frequent scribe
Posts: 26
Registered: ‎19-12-2016

Re: Alone

Yeah I will look into that psychologist I had a tough childhood.
Mod
Posts: 8,318
Registered: ‎10-08-2012

Re: Alone

@AStudyInHuman oh there's no need to apologise. I'm so glad that the party went well! Hope you gave yourself a pat on the back for going Smiley Very Happy

 

And yeah I can totally understand being cautiously optimistic about counselling, but there are definitely ways of managing things so you don't have to feel this way forever. Let us know how it goes/if you need any support while going through the process Smiley Happy

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ray, when you're on the Titanic, you load the lifeboats. You don't stop to yell at the iceberg.
Mod
Posts: 1,635
Registered: ‎04-10-2016

Re: Alone

@AStudyInHuman well done on going to the party and I am SO glad to hear that you felt happy and it went well!! Smiley Happy

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My freedom is an agreement with myself. It's an acceptance and love for who I am that isn't dependent on performance or the will of other people - Renee Yohe
Frequent scribe
Posts: 26
Registered: ‎19-12-2016

Re: Alone

Thank you..
I guess I'm just getting a.tad pessimistic I usually just don't expect things to go well.
I'm glad I went to but gosh I was nervous.
They were prettt genuinely nice people.
^_^
Frequent scribe
Posts: 26
Registered: ‎19-12-2016

Re: Alone

I will absolutely keep you guys updated it really helped getting it out in the open.
It was a huge help talking to you guys and getting advice.
* takes a relieved breath*
Thank you.

Do you need support?

ReachOut NextStep is a tool that can help you find the best support for you.

Open tool in sidebar
Top High Fived Authors
User High Fives Count
7
4
3
3
2