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Uber contributor
Posts: 2,496
Registered: ‎28-05-2016

Re: Bad Days

@Sally-RO it's this feeling that I get a lot. I know there are things I should be doing but I just can't seem to do them, and then I feel so so guilty and anxious about not doing them. Like I'm a really bad, lazy person. And anything else that I try to do to distract myself is boring and uncomfortable. And I don't feel suicidal, I don't particularly want to die, I just feel gross and I want to not be around for a while. And guilty. I feel really guilty and bad and like I've fucked everything up. And I feel really uncomfortable and unhappy and I just want to rest somewhere soft and cool for a bit but the only space that I have to myself in this stupid house is like one square foot of sofa so I just stay here and don't move. 

Once I read someone say that depression sometimes feels like literally watching paint dry. It's that kind of feeling I guess. 

Uber contributor
Posts: 2,496
Registered: ‎28-05-2016

Re: Bad Days

And then I usually end up doing this one thing that always makes me feel worse eventually. And then I hurt myself. It's a stupid, stupid pattern but I can't seem to escape it. 

Mod Squad
Posts: 571
Registered: ‎17-10-2016

Re: Bad Days

@DruidChild so insightful of you to get all that out, and  very brave to type it on the forum.

Can I make a suggestion - what could you do/or do you do to take a step back?

Uber contributor
Posts: 2,496
Registered: ‎28-05-2016

Re: Bad Days

@Sally-RO Thanks. I think it would help if I a) stopped reading what I'm reading because it triggers me every single time and I know that it does.  And then b) it'd probably be best to go outside but I can't cope with being questioned about it right now so maybe I'll have a shower and then sit at the table to do my work instead of on the sofa.

The feeling is turning into The Sadness now though so moving is hard Smiley Sad

Mod Squad
Posts: 571
Registered: ‎17-10-2016

Re: Bad Days

Shower sounds delightful, it's a bit chilly where I am at the moment. I know getting going is tough - but you are tougher @DruidChildSmiley LOL

Highlighted
Star contributor
Posts: 2,750
Registered: ‎06-03-2017

Re: Bad Days

im sorry your not doing the best @DruidChild 

Just remember the Butterfly. shes there,

and we are all here for you on here too Heart

 

Do something you enjoy to take your mind off it, maybe you could try your hand at drawing too?

Uber contributor
Posts: 2,496
Registered: ‎28-05-2016

Re: Bad Days

@Sally-RO I'm jealous, it's been really warm here lately, ugh Smiley Tongue

 

Thank you @scared01 Smiley Happy I ended up having a shower, going outside for a bit, and then watching some YouTube vids until I could go to bed.

Star contributor
Posts: 2,750
Registered: ‎06-03-2017

Re: Bad Days

it bloody pouring here @DruidChild its eased abit but the other day we were having flood evacuation warnings and alot of surrounding areas were actualy already gettin evacuated so i could do with a bit of warm weather rigt now

Star contributor
Posts: 2,750
Registered: ‎06-03-2017

Re: Bad Days

how are you going tonight @DruidChild?

how was your day?

Uber contributor
Posts: 2,496
Registered: ‎28-05-2016

Re: Bad Days

It's pouring with rain down here too @scared01

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