20-03-2017 06:54 PM
@Sally-RO it's this feeling that I get a lot. I know there are things I should be doing but I just can't seem to do them, and then I feel so so guilty and anxious about not doing them. Like I'm a really bad, lazy person. And anything else that I try to do to distract myself is boring and uncomfortable. And I don't feel suicidal, I don't particularly want to die, I just feel gross and I want to not be around for a while. And guilty. I feel really guilty and bad and like I've fucked everything up. And I feel really uncomfortable and unhappy and I just want to rest somewhere soft and cool for a bit but the only space that I have to myself in this stupid house is like one square foot of sofa so I just stay here and don't move.
Once I read someone say that depression sometimes feels like literally watching paint dry. It's that kind of feeling I guess.
20-03-2017 07:20 PM
@Sally-RO Thanks. I think it would help if I a) stopped reading what I'm reading because it triggers me every single time and I know that it does. And then b) it'd probably be best to go outside but I can't cope with being questioned about it right now so maybe I'll have a shower and then sit at the table to do my work instead of on the sofa.
The feeling is turning into The Sadness now though so moving is hard
20-03-2017 07:46 PM
im sorry your not doing the best @DruidChild
Just remember the Butterfly. shes there,
and we are all here for you on here too
Do something you enjoy to take your mind off it, maybe you could try your hand at drawing too?
21-03-2017 03:56 PM
21-03-2017 05:15 PM
it bloody pouring here @DruidChild its eased abit but the other day we were having flood evacuation warnings and alot of surrounding areas were actualy already gettin evacuated so i could do with a bit of warm weather rigt now