17-03-2017 12:18 PM
Hey @j95, are you feeling any better today?
I feel a little bit better today @N1ghtW1ng, thanks My anxiety was just really bad yesterday and then I melted down majorly when the electricity went out because of the rain and we had to leave class early. I'm thinking about going to this queer youth drop in place today so I'll see how I go.
Neg: So I missed a bunch of school because I've been sick for the last few weeks, and all my teachers have been really good about catching me up and giving me extensions and stuff, except for my maths teacher, who seems to think that I'm not way behind everyone else and that I don't need more time before the assessment, and that I totally understand everything that I haven't been there for. How am I supposed to know all the formulas and stuff if I haven't been taught? Ugh.
Pos: My super awesome house leader intervened and got me an extension on the assessment. I still don't really know how straight lines work, but at least I have the weekend and the internet to try and teach myself before the test.
Negative: I should have booked this thing I wanted to go to on April first back when I first saw it I realised I wanted to go, because now it's booked out. I was really excited for the idea of it.
Positive: I hadn't booked it because I didn't know if I'd actually be able to go, which I still don't know. I can't blame myself for being cautious before paying that much money. That I now definitely can't do it frees up all of my options of March 31st. And they'll definitely run it again, so I can do it later in the year when it's offered. Or next year, at worst.
Negative: I emailed a department of my uni to get them to approve something, and after they did that I got told by another department that I actually can't do that so need to emailed first department again to ask for permission for my second choice. I feel silly emailing them again. It doesn't make any sense that I have to email when they approval should really be transferable because if I had room to do the first thing, then of course I have room to do the second since it takes up the same amount ugh
Positive: An email takes no time at all. It's probably happened tons of times before. They would know it isn't a me thing, but a uni or second department thing. And as was proven by my first choice, I know this one will be approved.
Negative: I didn't stand up for my idea/understanding in a group task on Monday, instead I let everyone else in the team persuade me. We ended up losing a point because of this, because that answer was wrong, and while mine wasn't exactly right if I'd stuck to it we would have ended up with the right answer.
Positive: This is really just a lesson that I need to trust in myself and my knowledge more, and to not be so afraid of being the voice of dissent in the group. It's a lesson only worth like, 2% of my overall mark. It's alright. Uni is for learning and this is a learning experience.
Negative: Nothing I wanted to/planned to do today worked out.
Positive: The first, or major, thing isn't my fault. Can't hold myself accountable for electricity outages. After that, I was so tired, and I really can't expect myself to have remembered something 1. when I was in that state and 2. when I had already discarded it from my mind a bit from believing that I couldn't do it.
And okay, while there are a couple of other things that I didn't do when I then realised I could have (picking up thing from uni, going to medicare, getting a bloodtest) none of those were things I originally meant to do today anyway. I can do them any day. And I still have the rest of the night to get some uni things done. I'll have a new thing for dinner. I sent off applications for quite a few things. Today doesn't have to go down as a complete waste.