04-03-2017 05:25 PM
Okay @setmefree. I'm going to try and challenge the thought that I mentioned earlier, that I'm never going to get better. What negative thought would you like to challenge for yourself? I guess this is kind of the first step, identifying a thought.
04-03-2017 05:46 PM
The next bit is to ask ourselves some questions - what am I thinking about myself? What am I thinking about other people? What am I thinking about the situation? How do I think I might cope? What will I do?
So for me, I might say that I'm thinking of myself as powerless to change anything, I'm thinking that other people around me (like doctors) won't be able to help and that makes me think of myself as isolated. I'm also thinking about the situation in a powerless way, that I can't change anything, and in a catastrophic way, that the worst is going to happen. I might decide to cope with this thought by reading about how other people have recovered from mental illness or by talking to my counsellor about it.
When you're ready @setmefree, maybe you can try this as well and post how you go (only if you feel comfortable sharing!)
04-03-2017 06:38 PM
step 2 was the challange the thoughts with other questions....
1. what actual facts do i have?
im not smart in many situations, i didnt do well in school or in my hsc, i keep making the wrong decisions, people dont seem to care that much, most dont seem to think that my opinion is important, im always in trouble for something esp when it involves being on the computer or going out or going to appointments so that means i dont need to look after myself becasue im just not worth it, i dont have friends so again its my fault theres something wrong with me and i dont deserve friends, im finding the course that im studying hard, i always fail my tests so why is this one any different.
2. Is this thought true in all cases?
i think so but probably not
3. does this thougth help my mood, think prodcutively or help behaviour?
no it just makes me feel more worthless and that life isnt worth living anymore. and it end uo sself harming or the urge gets even stronger to self harm
umm not sure what to do next @DruidChild
04-03-2017 06:49 PM
Okay @setmefree really well done for doing step two That was really great how you identified that the thought is not helping your mood. Before you go on, do you reckon you could think of three facts that suggest that you're not stupid or worthless? Maybe something like, you have a pet who really loves you, or, you have good taste in music, or a time when you did really well in something?
And, do you reckon you could come up with one or two answers for the question 'how could I cope with this thought??'
The next bit is where you question whether the way you are thinking is helpful. You've already done that a bit though If you want to, you can try applying this matrix to it - You can ask whether the thought is:
Reasonable or catastrophic? (e.g my thought is catastrophic because it predicts the worst)
Self enhancing or self defeating? (e.g. as you've said neither of our thoughts help us so they're self defeating)
Logical or illogical? (does it always rely on all the facts available?)
Flexible or rigid? (e.g. you might say that your thought is rigid because it says that you're stupid and worthless across all scenarios, whereas a flexible thought might say that you're good at some things and need help with other things).
When you're ready to move on, you want to ask yourself whether there are alternatives for what you are thinking?
Sorry for the info dump Explaining is one of the things I need help with a lot!
04-03-2017 07:35 PM
i cant think of anything that doesnt really suggest that im not stuppid or not worthless.
im not sure how i can cope with the thought really unless i self harm which i do.
this thought is catastrophic, rigid and self defeating.
my only other alternatives jsut support the tought like, im worthless beacause im stupid.
04-03-2017 07:51 PM
It's great that you've been able to identify the ways that this thought is unhelpful to you...reckon there's anyway of reframing it so that it's reasonable, self-enhancing (helpful to you), and more flexible? What is a thought about yourself that would make you feel good or lift your mood?
Something I found really helpful when I first did this was to think about my values about other people. For example, I strongly believe that everybody has worth and strengths, so I was able to extend that belief to myself as well.
What are you up to tonight, anything relaxing you could do to take care of yourself?