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Super frequent scribe
Posts: 1,092
Registered: ‎06-03-2017

i dont really know how to react or what to do..?

Hi guys

im in a bit of a situation. i dont really know how to feel, i have soo mnay mixed emotions about this situations  and im having a lot of trouble moving forward with it. i

So when I was about 9 I was offerred a horse to ride as my mums boyfriend owned a riding school and no one ever used this horse as she was suited to beginners so they offered her to me and said if I do the work with her which pretty much included rebreaking in then I could ride her and take her to horse shows and do pony club with her and she was mine to keep for as long as possible.
So I worked on this horse for 6 years and had this horse almost perfect but not for beginners still as she use to buck but as I trained her up she was so trusting of me she almost seemed like another horse for other people and she hated other people riding her. I took her to pony club, beach rides, road rides and taught her how to travel on a float and came home with many ribbons even if they were 5th it didnt matetr to me. This horse was my best friend and I spent every waking hour with her when I wasnt at school.
After these years though, mum and her boyfriend broke up and without a word or warning, my mum got a phone call saying that if I was to enter the property they would call the police on me. I never even got to say goodbye to her Smiley Sad

it breaks my heart every time I think about her. And my sister- her pop s the one who owns the horse so my sisters still Is allowed on the property and when she goes up there she talks about her without the intention of hurting me but it breaks my heart every single day. I havent felt the same about horses since nor have I been able to form a connection with one since then and this was 6 years ago Smiley Sad

and do you know what makes it worse, where I live the property is pretty much at the back of our house and theres abike track and every now and then I go for a walk along there ad I see her and I call her and she knows who it is I can see it in her eyes but she cant come over as theres far to much gap between the fence and where I am. Sometime I wish I could just jump the fence and go see her. I miss her so much

 

any advice is appreciated

Mod
Posts: 428
Registered: ‎29-08-2016

Re: i dont really know how to react or what to do..?

Hey @scared01 Smiley Happy

 

It sounds like you really miss this horse and that she is still on your mind. Is it possible to explain the situation to your mum's ex so that you could visit it? Even if you don't take it anywhere?

Super frequent scribe
Posts: 1,092
Registered: ‎06-03-2017

Re: i dont really know how to react or what to do..?

nope they dont want anything to do with me @JanaG

Mod
Posts: 428
Registered: ‎29-08-2016

Re: i dont really know how to react or what to do..?

Sorry to hear that @scared01 Smiley Sad

I have an idea that might sound a little silly, but when there is something I want to say to someone, but I can't actually see them or contact them, I write letters to get the feelings out instead of bottling them up. Do you think this might be helpful for you?

Super frequent scribe
Posts: 1,092
Registered: ‎06-03-2017

Re: i dont really know how to react or what to do..?

i dont think so @JanaG they would prob jsut tear it up

im really trying to move foraward but its soo friggin hard

Mod
Posts: 428
Registered: ‎29-08-2016

Re: i dont really know how to react or what to do..?

Sorry  @scared01, I wasn't clear. What I meant was, could you express what your feeling about the horse in a letter to her as a way to let it out?

Super frequent scribe
Posts: 1,092
Registered: ‎06-03-2017

Re: i dont really know how to react or what to do..?

oh ok @JanaG

i wouldnt know what to put in the letter except that i miss her

any ideas?

Mod
Posts: 826
Registered: ‎26-08-2016

Re: i dont really know how to react or what to do..?

@scared01 I'm so sorry that you aren't able to see the horse anymore Smiley Sad a bond/connection between a horse and a person can be so strong. Do you have/take care of many horses at the moment?
Super frequent scribe
Posts: 1,092
Registered: ‎06-03-2017

Re: i dont really know how to react or what to do..?

yeah i do @May_ but it doesnt feel the same. it hasnt for a long time. i ahvent been able to form that bond with any of the horses ive ahd. and the horse im riding now it a total b@#ch and it makes riding or being around them enjoyable

Mod
Posts: 826
Registered: ‎26-08-2016

Re: i dont really know how to react or what to do..?

@scared01 that must be really tough. How long have you been around the newer horses?

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