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Re: [Special guest] Twenty10 talks about coming out.
Do you think you have to invite everyone in? Why or why not?
Nope. It's up to every person to decide for themselves who they want to tell and in what timeframe. Some people will want the whole world to know at once. Some people will only be comfortable with telling a few people from one part of their lives and no one from another part. I think it's about what feels comfortable and safe based on their relationships with other people.
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Re: [Special guest] Twenty10 talks about coming out.
Also maybe it would be cool if some of that asking became common practice? Like asking for pronouns, for example...
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Re: [Special guest] Twenty10 talks about coming out.
Do you think you have to invite everyone in? Why or why not?
Definitely not it's 100% your choice and okay to never tell anyone, or tell absolutely everyone! So the tricky thing is deciding who you want to invite in and who you don't and why or why not! Interested to hear on what sort of things might mean that a person decides not to invite certain people in and what might help you decide it's a great time to share @Bobby-Twenty10 @milohunto?
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Re: [Special guest] Twenty10 talks about coming out.
You don't have to, it's completely up to you who you let know.
Me personally I'm really open about being gay but it took me a while to get there and it's not usually something I share unless it comes up.
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
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Re: [Special guest] Twenty10 talks about coming out.
I agree @milohunto pronouns in particular are things we should just get comfortable with asking i reckon or if not asking, then making sure people feel heaps comfortable to share theirs. @Bay52VU Made a heaps good thread so that we can share our Pronouns
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Re: [Special guest] Twenty10 talks about coming out.
Well said @N1ghtW1ng to all of the above. Especially - "Do what makes you happy" <-- YES! As long as you aren't hurting anyone, why should it matter?
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Re: [Special guest] Twenty10 talks about coming out.
Of course, you can still share who you are, but in that world, it would be less inviting in than informing others.
Does that make sense? This is for a nonheteronormative(is that right?) world though.
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Re: [Special guest] Twenty10 talks about coming out.
I think it can be really handy to think about whether or not it's safe to invite folks in, what the worst outcome could be, and what you might be able to do if that happens-- for example, if you decide to invite in with your folks, what would the worst that might happen? What measures could you take?
It can also be really useful to road test things like new pronouns or names with some close folks you feel comfortable with.
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Re: [Special guest] Twenty10 talks about coming out.
To use modern language...
Don't let the haters stop you from being you.
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Re: [Special guest] Twenty10 talks about coming out.
Do you think you have to invite everyone in? Why or why not?
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