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This ones for the boys (and the people that love them)

We know we don't get heaps of guys posting on the RO.coms, but fellas this one is for you. For this Infobus we're joined by Carpell who runs school workshops around healthy relationships and anti-violence and with young people in the Respect Protect Connect (RPC) program at the South Eastern Centre Against Sexual Assualt (SECASA) in Melbourne.    

 

Here is Carpell with his colleague Hayley (who has also been an Infobus special guest!)

 

Have you ever wondered about any of the these things????

 

If you’re going to have sex (or do sexual things) how can you be sure the other person wants to as well?

What does the law say about consent?

When is it sexual harassment and when is it a compliment?

Is porn a good educational to learn about sex?

What is ‘domestic violence’ and what is a healthy relationship?

Is sexting okay to do with someone you trust?

What is ‘masculinity’ and are there better ways to deal with violence/confrontation?

How can you respectfully interact with females?

What can you do to stop violence and sexual assault?

 

For answers to these questions and to discuss anything else on your mind, and more please join us on Thursday 21st November at 9pm AEST/6pm WST to learn what 

 

 

Online Community Manager

ReachOut.com

Re: This ones for the boys (and the people that love them)

Hello and welcome to the November 'bus here on RO.com! We are really stoked to be joined by Carpell who works with young guys through the Respect. Protect. Connect program (part of the South Eastern Centre against Sexual Assault).

 

Tonight, we’ll be asking your thoughts on a bunch of things to do with having healthier relationships - and while we'll have a focus on the role guys play in this process - this chat is for everyone! Over the next hour & a half we'll be asking you for your thoughts and opinions and your best tips for respectful relationships. 

 

I’ll be co-facilitating tonight with ruenhonx, one of our awesome peer moderators, as well as Carpell our special guest. If at any stage you feel overwhelmed or upset by anything that happens in the discussion, know you can always have a chat with the legends at Kids Helpline (webchat or 1800 55 1800).

 

As always, please take note of the guidelines that help everyone feel safe & supported here: stay anonymous; no linking to other campaigns without permission and no descriptions of self-harm, suicide or abuse that might be triggering to others. There’s more guidelines, read them here.

 

OK, so to kick things off tonight here is the first question:

First question for tonight, how can you know the difference for when yr comment is sexual harassment and when it is a compliment?

Online Community Manager

ReachOut.com

Re: This ones for the boys (and the people that love them)

Guys often think yelling "hey sexy" or whistling is a compliment and light hearted fun but most of the female friends I talk to have absolutely hated it.

Re: This ones for the boys (and the people that love them)

As a guy, if I was walking down the street and a girl called me sexy, I'd probably love it along with a lot of other guys. But when you look at the sexual assaults statistics, you can understand why it is different for many girls.

Re: This ones for the boys (and the people that love them)

Hi Carpell! Welcome along - thanks for being our special guest tonight!

Online Community Manager

ReachOut.com

Re: This ones for the boys (and the people that love them)

over 90% of rape and sexual assault happens from males to females (which is a sad statistic).

Re: This ones for the boys (and the people that love them)

Wow, that is a sad statistic Carpell but I guess that shows why when we talk about sexual assault resources are focused into supporting women...

Online Community Manager

ReachOut.com

Re: This ones for the boys (and the people that love them)

Hey everyone Smiley Happy 

Hope we get some awesome discussion tonight. 

 

First question for tonight, how can you know the difference for when yr comment is sexual harassment and when it is a compliment?

I think a compliment is supposed to make you feel good, when someone says you look beautiful today or your eyes are pretty it makes me smile but when someone says something like nice ass or you look sexy, it makes me feel more self-conscious more than good I guess. 

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**Believe in the power of you because you are your own hero**

Re: This ones for the boys (and the people that love them)

Hi Rue! Yea, that is such a good point - and i think as well a certain level of familiarity or relationship needs to exist between people so you know what type of compliment they will appreciate.... generally to strangers, its a no no when it comes to making a comment about their body - even if you think it's a compliment

Online Community Manager

ReachOut.com

Re: This ones for the boys (and the people that love them)

Context is everything too... Calling a partner sexy in private is much differnet to yelling it to someone in class or in public- That's Sexual harassment!