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Re: AMAA: Change with Psychologist Rashida

@Lost_Space_Explorer5  haha funny concept!

 

Writing letters to your future self is fantastic, so cool you did that in school!

writing letters to younger you can also be pretty powerful - maybe trying to write a letter to younger you about all the things you were worried that were going to change back then and how they’ve turned out? 

Re: AMAA: Change with Psychologist Rashida

How to accept bad news - Accepting that acceptance or receiving of bad news will most probably also result in the surfacing of some difficult emotions like anxiety, sadness, grief, or anger - these are all emotions which we usually attempt to avoid however they are vital in the process of getting through and accepting the bad news or change. They are part of our human condition and human emotional experience. Sit with them and know they are valid and there for a reason, it’s so normal to find it difficult to accept bad news.

Re: AMAA: Change with Psychologist Rashida

Oof I feel younger me would be disappointed in how things turned out @GuestPsychologist1 😅 But that is an interesting challenge, I might try it Smiley Happy

Re: AMAA: Change with Psychologist Rashida

I feel like I've had to digest bad news quite a few times recently @GuestPsychologist1. I really like your advice about sitting with the emotion and allowing yourself to feel what you feel. Life is full of ups and downs.

Re: AMAA: Change with Psychologist Rashida

@GuestPsychologist1 that's so true, it's only as I've gotten older that I've realised how much I would try and avoid difficult or uncomfortable emotions, and I think it is so incredibly important to realise that sometimes we do need to sit with those- like you say, it's a part of the human condition Heart 

 

I feel like the next question relates quite a bit to the last 2 questions, it comes from someone from our Instagram community: 

 

Change GIF by memecandy

 

What if I can't cope with change? 

 

__________

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Re: AMAA: Change with Psychologist Rashida

Sorry to hear @WheresMySquishy - Remember sitting in the feels is super important at times however if you are feeling like the emotion surfacing from the bad news is hard to contain and becomes too overwhelming, it is also completely ok and important to at times distract or compartmentalise it for a little bit in order to keep functioning through the day - It can become a bit of a balancing act in knowing when to sit with the feeling and when to let it sit on the side, knowing that there’s no ‘right or wrong’ way to go about managing the feelings that arise from hearing bad news. 

Re: AMAA: Change with Psychologist Rashida

I guess this is determined more by what you consider ‘can’t’ to look or feel like - Is it that it brings about too much overwhelming emotion that feels all consuming and that then makes you feel like you can’t get through it or is it something else.

I believe we can all get through change with the right support around us, but the way in which we get through it may look different from person to person, again back to my previous answer - remembering there is no ‘right or wrong’ way, but more so adaptive and maladaptive ways to get through our changes. 

Re: AMAA: Change with Psychologist Rashida

Love that approach @GuestPsychologist1 - the right support can truly make the world of difference, and sometimes it can be really easy to beat ourselves up if we feel like we're not coping with things the "right" way. 

 

I thought this next question was  really interesting one: 

 

 

 

How can I better cope with being over sensitive both in general and coping when I get criticisms even if it is constructive?

__________

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Re: AMAA: Change with Psychologist Rashida

Super interesting question.

 

I guess to pre-face this question i would provide some context around the fact that we as human beings are hard-wired with a ‘negativity bias’ which is there to help keep us safe from ‘risk’, however, can at times flood into everyday life when we don’t really need to be protected from any risk - including when we are getting criticism/ or feedback. 

It basically means we spend a lot more time focusing and then ruminating on what we perceive as negative - news/ information or criticism. The fact we spend more time focusing on it, means it has more of a chance to commit to our memory and then all the positive feedback/ or constructive criticism we get basically doesn’t stand a chance. 

E.g - If you are to receive some ‘negative’ feedback from your manager on Monday, and the remainder of the week is neutral or positive - you will still be thinking about the feedback from Monday and find it difficult to take into account the rest of the week and feedback you received. 

Re: AMAA: Change with Psychologist Rashida

@GuestPsychologist1  I think that's so true. I think people are more likely to focus on negative feedback in comparison to positive feedback.