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Re: AMAA: LGBTIQA+ ReachOut Edition

Super brave of you to ask @Hozzles my hat goes off to you 

 

GIF by MOODMAN

Re: AMAA: LGBTIQA+ ReachOut Edition

@Lost_Space_Explorer5 hahah I had a similar feeling with my ex. I had no idea if I really liked her (I'd never had a relationship before), or if I wanted a relationship. Initially she rejected me and I felt kind of relieved because I didn't have to do anything new Smiley LOL. Ah, it's such an awkward part of life! 

Re: AMAA: LGBTIQA+ ReachOut Edition

Loving all these gifs @Bre-RO! Smiley Happy

Re: AMAA: LGBTIQA+ ReachOut Edition

Hahahah ahh the awkwardness of figuring these things out indeed @Hozzles lucky it's funny to look back on when you get enough distance from the experience. 

 

Why thank you @WheresMySquishy it's always so fun picking the gifs for these chats 

Re: AMAA: LGBTIQA+ ReachOut Edition

Me too @WheresMySquishy! Finding the right gifs is such an art Smiley Very Happy

@Hozzles everything is so awkward in life Smiley LOL why is that Smiley LOL

Re: AMAA: LGBTIQA+ ReachOut Edition

life is so awkward hahaha @Lost_Space_Explorer5 and you are so right. It is an art form..sometimes I spend waaaay too much time trying to find one that feels right. 

Re: AMAA: LGBTIQA+ ReachOut Edition

Be Yourself Coming Out GIF by bubly

 

How will I ever come out to my parents? How do I know they won't reject me?

 

Coming out is hard and no one person's experience is the same. However, there are many common threads that run through the experience of coming out, so there’s a few tips I will share: 

 

  • Something you come to learn when you are part of the LGBTIQA+ umbrella is that you will come out many times in your life. It gets easier as time goes on but at the start it can feel really overwhelming. Practice coming out to people you know for sure will have your back. This will help you find the words that feel best for you and help you ease into the process. 
  • Build your support network if you think the news could be a difficult road ahead for you and your parents. Friends, other families members, psychologists, youth workers and queer specific youth services. 
  • Many of us have spoken at some point about having a "chosen family" and this question can explain why. We can't control how our loved ones will view us and while that can be sad to come to terms with, what balances all that out is finding people who love you no matter who you are. 
  • Try writing a letter if sitting face to face is too daunting, doing things in a way that will make you feel comfortable and safe is the most important thing. 
  • When you do come out, no matter the response, try to feel proud of yourself - it's a big step and it might take time to feel comfortable with the experience. That is okay and normal. 

I was so nervous to come out to my parents...and they are both queer! No matter who you are or where you come from, it can be an awkward, unsettling or down right scary experience. Trust that you'll find your feet and you will absolutely find people who accept you for you. If you feel rejected, absolutely open up to people who you feel can be gentle and loving towards you. No matter how hard it gets, remind yourself that there is no shame in being exactly who you are Heart 

 

@Bre-RO (aka meee) Community Team

Re: AMAA: LGBTIQA+ ReachOut Edition

Those are some great tips @Bre-RO! I really like your point about coming out many times in your life, and being proud of yourself no matter the response you receive.

Re: AMAA: LGBTIQA+ ReachOut Edition

@Bre-RO YES! So true that there's never just one 'coming out' event. I don't think I've ever explicitly told someone 'I'm gay', I've just like used she/her pronouns when referring to potential partners, or expressing support of the community and hope they get the hint. Smiley LOL. I don't even think I've explicitly told my parents I'm gay, just that I used to date a girl hahah. I still panic using she/her pronouns for potential partners for people I don't know (even if they're LGBT themselves?) and I don't know if that feeling will ever go away... but I think that's more of a 'I don't know how they're going to react' thing.

Re: AMAA: LGBTIQA+ ReachOut Edition

Thank you @WheresMySquishy it's something that I found really hard to come to terms with...I felt so overwhelmed that I would have to keep coming out. People would often say they didn't pick that I am queer...which was annoying and hurtful sometimes. It made me feel like I had to wear a shirt saying "I am queer" or something haha but it got easier and now I say it with full confidence and pride, no matter who I am telling. 

 

And you are soooo on the money @Hozzles I was actually going to say that. You don't have to say "hey everyone I am gay". Saying I like this girl or I would like to date this person is how I went about it to begin with. It took a solid year of being in my first gay relationship to start even using the word gay. It all takes time and practice. Also haha love love that you share your pronouns to drop the hint. Another good way of working out if the other person is LGBTIQA+ is talking about previous dating experiences with girls...that helps to put it out there in a subtle way.