cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Re: Ask A Pro Live: Healthy Relationships November 2019

thanks Bre.  I'm a big advocate of self-care - looking after yourself is the first step to being able to support and help others Smiley Happy.  I think for anyone trying to access support - whether that's for domestic and family violence, sexual assault, mental health, drugs and alcohol - the system can be so confusing.  For me, that's always been obvious both as someone that has worked in these areas and someone that's sort support for different things along the way.  You never know where to start or what to say.  When we are talking with people and they hear that they can contact us anonymously and that they might not be sure about what they want to talk about - that can be such a relief to someone.  No one knows what kind of help they want if they don't know there's help out there.... the most important moment I see, is when someone is able to say outloud (whether that's on the phone, webchat or face-to-face), hey - i'm not sure what's going on and i'm not sure if I need help, but I need someone to talk to.

Re: Ask A Pro Live: Healthy Relationships November 2019

I agree!  I try and find something that brings me joy or a giggle every single day... I have a pretty cheeky sense of humour so it's not that hard!

Re: Ask A Pro Live: Healthy Relationships November 2019

@inez1800RESPECTI think anonymous support services can be really great. A lot of people I know are more confident using an anonymous service before they start using a face to face service. Smiley Happy

Re: Ask A Pro Live: Healthy Relationships November 2019

I agree @WheresMySquishy .  that first conversation can be so nerve-racking.  and no one ever really knows what they want to say until they start talking.  being able to call a service anonymously just removes some of that barrier of feeling judged or having to identify yourself.... especially when you're talking about things that make you feel scared or uncomfortable.  

Re: Ask A Pro Live: Healthy Relationships November 2019

@inez1800RESPECT that's so true! I've found it's always a lot less daunting seeking help for the first time if you know you can be anonymous. The best way I can describe it is maybe... if someone knows your name, then your story is part of you identity. But with anonymity, you can talk about it sometimes as if it's something outside of yourself, if that makes sense?


@inez1800RESPECT wrote:

I try and find something that brings me joy or a giggle every single day... I have a pretty cheeky sense of humour so it's not that hard!


Excellent advice! ❤ I try to as well, and it's really not hard to make me laugh or smile now matter how I feel, so it makes me feel better. 😁 I agree, self care is the best thing anyone can do.

Re: Ask A Pro Live: Healthy Relationships November 2019

I completely agree with you. I have also found accessing help confusing and confronting at times. I'm sure many people here totally relate to what you've said there! Your advice is really helpful though. There is power in saying you don't know what steps to take next but simply that you need someone at that moment Heart 

 

It's really special when you find someone who is able to hold your hand in that process - whether that be a counsellor, friend or family member. 

 

 

That leads me to another question... 

 

What do you think the signs of a Healthy Relationship are? 

Re: Ask A Pro Live: Healthy Relationships November 2019

@Hozzles It's so nice that you're able to laugh, no matter how you feel! I'm a big believer in if you don't laugh you'll cry. I know having a sense of humour has helped me a lot Smiley Happy 

Re: Ask A Pro Live: Healthy Relationships November 2019

@WheresMySquishy definitely can be a great warm-up to talking to someone about what's going on Smiley Happy

Re: Ask A Pro Live: Healthy Relationships November 2019

that's so true @Bre-RO .  I often say that we have the most difficult conversations with those close to us in the car... that way you don't have to look them in the eye when you're sharing how you feel.  Relationships look and feel different for everyone.  I always think - do I smile when I think of this person?  is there trust between us.  do I feel comfortable to be myself?  do I not feel judged or put down?  

We all have the absolute right to feel respect, love and care in our relationships - whether that's partners, friends of family members.  Even work colleagues, school mates (ok, probs don't want the love necessarily there but definitely the respect).  You can have a healthy relationship with someone who isn't your friend.  it's about accepting them as different to you.  in terms of close relationships, kindness, humour, care and curiousity are the big feelings I look for Smiley Happy.  

Re: Ask A Pro Live: Healthy Relationships November 2019

@inez1800RESPECT that car thing is SO TRUE. Whenever I'm having a difficult time, or my Mum is having a difficult time, we will always talk about it in the car, even when we're going somewhere completely random and unrelated. Sometimes I ask to get some fast food knowing we can sit for a long time in the drive-thru and just talk. 

I also think it's true (and very important) to recognise we can have healthy relationships with people who aren't our friends. It's important to treat everyone with the same level of respect and dignity. 😃