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22y/o guy dating 15y/o girl-What do you think?

Im 22 and have recently become acquainted with a fantastic girl at my gym. Shes everything I'm looking for and more. I was stunned to learn she's 15, I'm conflicted, I like her but have reservations about the age gap. I've never dated younger. Shes quite mature and level-headed. And of course I will keep things chaste until shes of age and respect her boundaries. 

 

 

Do you think the age gap is acceptable or not?

Re: 22y/o guy dating 15y/o girl-What do you think?

I'm 15 at the moment and not interested in relationships but I know my dad was 12 years older than my mum and they got on pretty well. I'd say it's about the personality and not the age but that's just my opinion. As @Myvo you do need to make sure the relationship is legal.

Re: 22y/o guy dating 15y/o girl-What do you think?

Hey @jackson241

 

Welcome to ReachOut.com.

 

Can definitely see why you're feeling conflicted about the age gap. It's important to note the age of consent laws in Australia by reading it up here. In NSW, the age of consent is 16 years. However, the girl who you are interested in is still under 18 years so she will still be considered as a minor. 

 

I think that being friends and hanging out is a safe way to go. But it doesn't hurt to ask her if she's interested in a relationship. Regardless of the outcome or what her answer may be, I'm glad to hear that you would respect her boundaries and be understanding. 

 

Hope this helps. 

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Stay excellent

Re: 22y/o guy dating 15y/o girl-What do you think?

Hey @jackson241 , I personally think the age gap is something that both you and the young girl would have to come to terms with yourself,  but I do think it's important to remember that even if this girl seems "mature"  and "level-headed" beyond her years, she is only 15. At the end of the day it is your decision (and her decision) about where you want to go with your relationship, but I do think that there are a few things that you should consider before you decide what steps to take.

 

 

You are both at very different points in your life and it's likely that what a relationship means to a 15 year old is probably very different to what it means to someone in their early 20s. As someone who is a similar age to you, I'm interested in moving out with my boyfriend, going on holidays with him and doing things that we can only do as adults. The age gap is obviously going to heavily impact that kind of thing for your relationship (if you choose to pursue it) and would even affect things like where you could go on dates and what kind of dates you would have (things like late night catch ups, or getting casual after dinner drinks or even some dinner dates are probably going to be out of the question). It also means that mixing with each other's friends may be more difficult then if you were of a similar age.

 

Regardless of your good intentions and plans to keep things chaste, I also think there's a possiblity that the girl's family may regard the relationship negatively. I would not take this as a reflection on you personally but rather as a result of the stigma of an older guy dating a young girl. If you do decide to approach this girl and she is interested in having a relationship with you, I think it would be very important for both of you to sit down with her parents and discuss it together. It's likely that they would have a lot of concerns about the situation and meeting you upfront and hearing your intentions may help alleviate them a bit. Don't be suprised if they want to set some ground rules (ie. a curfew, having the door open etc, her not being allowed to your house etc).

 

On a personal level, I support @Myvo 's suggestion that it may be best to remain friends for now.  Although I typically don't think age gaps matter that much, I do think that they can cause a lot of issues when one of the people involved are a minor (not just for legality reasons, but also because of the stigma which can be very damaging for both people involved and just the differences in where people are at in their lives). It may be safer for both of you mentally and emotionally to stay friends at this point and wait until she becomes a little older and more experienced.

 

I think you have really good intentions and you seem really respectful and concerned, which you should be really proud of! At the end of the day you're the one who needs to decide to do what you think feels right for you, and she neeeds to decide what feels right for her.  Good luck!

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Re: 22y/o guy dating 15y/o girl-What do you think?

yeah, the generation gap isnt that big haha. but do treat it with care. You might see her act mature she is still only 15. I would caution about spreading the words too. There is always someone who is looking for things to judge, criticize or even ridicule.

In the end though, if it works out, best wishes to you both.