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Re: 'Doing it' for the first time

@supersky It's awesome that you're having those discussions now.

@snowflake-19 Like you I take the pill and use condoms as well - good for peace of mind as nothing 100% effective.

@JustBe Communication is definitely key! I've got some friends who are attracted to the same sex as them and their first time was pretty much the same with the awkward feelings and nervousness. I think everyone, regardless of their sexual attractions, is a little worried when they first have sexual experiences that they won't be good at it - but as with anything, practice and communication helps a lot!

Re: 'Doing it' for the first time

 

Re: 'Doing it' for the first time


@snowflake-19 wrote:
My boyfriend and I use The Pill and condoms. Gives me peace of mind that there's 2 safety nets.

 

I love that you've talked it through. Did you find it hard to talk about it with him?

My convo was an awkward one but we've had it and I'm pleased I did. Was able to clear the air about expectations and limits


Yeah, I think I'd like to use 2 contraceptives like that. I have difficulties swallowing any sort of pill though, so that option might prove a little tricky. (I've heard that there's a chewable pill, but haven't found much more out about it - that'll be one for me to ask a doctor/family planning clinic about in the future!)

 

It was a bit weird talking about it with my boyfriend at first, especially cause I didn't want to weird him out or anything... But it turned out he had the same sort of concerns that I did, and it was really reassuring to know that we could discuss it together.

It's awesome that your conversation went well too, snowflake Smiley Happy

Re: 'Doing it' for the first time

I'm really sorry to hear that your first time was a bad experience, florenceforever.

Re: 'Doing it' for the first time


@supersky wrote:

I'm really sorry to hear that your first time was a bad experience, florenceforever.


Me too. How have you moved on from that experience, florenceforever?

Re: 'Doing it' for the first time

Hey everyone,

 

Well my first time was when I was 16. I'd been with my boyfriend at the time for 2 years by the time we had sex. We were both much too young before that to complicate our relationship with sex, plus, my mum was very clear that I wasn't allowed to have sex until I was legally allowed to, which I respected. When we did have sex, it was great. We made a big deal of it, went out to dinner together then stayed at a Bed & Breakfast for the night. I don't remember penetration hurting at all, but I do remember thinking, "Oh my god, I've waited two years for this and he's not going to fit in meeeeeeeee!" Of course he did, we just had to figure out whose body was meant to go where and get into the same rhythm.

 

I have absolutely no regrets about how I lost my virginity. I'm really proud that we waited for as long as we did. We stayed together for a number of years after that and had a great sex life, built on communication and mutual respect.

 

And hopefully this isn't too much info for you all, but with my new boyfriend, we recently tried anal penetration and I was surprised at how much that felt like I'd lost my virginity all over again. It was his first time too and it really did make us feel closer to each other. He was really good at checking in to make sure I was ok with it and I felt really safe to say to him to slow down or what ever I needed. 

 

All in all, losing my virginity has been great for me.

Re: 'Doing it' for the first time


@florenceforever wrote:

My first time was a huge mistake - I regretted it for weeks and didn't talk to the guy for months afterwards! Not because it was awkward or anything, but I did it for all the wrong reasons. I did it because everyone else seemed to be doing it and I didn't want to be socially excluded.

 

So, my EX boyfriend and I did it in the back of his car one night. No, we hadn't done it during the six week we'd been going out as I didn't feel as though I was ready. Huge mistake, it screwed me up and I really regret it.


That's a shame that your first time happened because you felt pressure with it seeming like everyone else was doing it too.

 

Though there's no way of knowing what's going to happen in the future, I think for me, I am most probably waiting for until I'm married. That's *if* I marry I guess, seeing as I'm turning 21 this year and have never had a boyfriend.

Re: 'Doing it' for the first time

I just found this on one of my favourite websites, Rookiemag.com

Check it out for more info/a fresh perspective

http://rookiemag.com/2012/04/losing-i/

 

DB

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Re: 'Doing it' for the first time

I'm saving sex for marriage so I look forward to my first time. Smiley Happy