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Don’t know what to do

Hello , recently I moved school after getting bullied and not feeling like I fit in . Last year at my new school everything was great , but this year I feel like the same problems are starting to happen again and it is worse cause it is all my fault this time , in my desperation to fit into my new school I started acting like a couple of people who accepted me into their friendship group ( eg . Saying racist and homophobic stuff ) which is not who I am . I know I am a good person I just so desperately wanted to fit in at my new school that I have not stayed true to myself know I feel if I tell people what is going on people will hate me cause I have not been innocent aswell , I don’t know how to fix this situation , I really want my last year of high school to finish good , can someone please help me 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Re: Don’t know what to do

Hey @Lonelyboy17 sounds like you were in a really tough situation at school and you did what you needed to do in order to get by.

I think it's great that you're aware that the way you acted is not a reflection of who you are - that's a really strength.

Are there other people at school with whom you could hang out, that don't share those discriminatory views, and do you reckon you could try to get to know them?

 

Looking forward to hearing from you Smiley Happy 

// Spiral outward, keep going. //

Re: Don’t know what to do

Hey @letitgo yeah I will definitely hang out with different people , but I am just worried about people understanding that the way I acted is not who I am , do you think they will understand .

Re: Don’t know what to do

Hi @Lonelyboy17, trying to fit into a new school and friendship group can be really hard. Smiley Sad I have been there myself. Is there anyone you feel you can be yourself around? Often in life, sometimes people can just be a poor fit for us and it's a good idea to keep reaching out to other people until we find someone who can accept us as we are. I have experienced this a few times too, where people expected me to be someone I wasn't and do new things that I wasn't comfortable with doing. If you feel as though you have hurt people with the stuff you said, I think most people would be accepting of an apology and be willing to let you into their life again. Apologising takes nothing away from you and can show that you're willing to change and that you're a mature and good person. It's up to you though, of course.

I think the advice @letitgo gave is really great.

Re: Don’t know what to do

@WheresMySquishy - I really love how you said "Often in life, sometimes people can just be a poor fit for us and it's a good idea to keep reaching out to other people until we find someone who can accept us as we are"

 

I think this is so so accurate, and very great advice for @Lonelyboy17. Often all you need in life is 1 or 2 people who REALLY get you. It may take some patience but you will find them eventually.  

Re: Don’t know what to do

I can relate to your last sentences @TOM-RO. I need 1-2 friends that accept me for who I am. Meh. I found 1. Maybe... idk.

@Lonelyboy1717, I can't exactly help, but just know, that I'm in nearly the same problem as you. You aren't alone.

What everyone else said, I agree with completely. Try those suggestions. I think they might help. And if anyone realizes the real you, just say, 'that wasn't the real me. I wanted to fit in, and that's the end of it'
That sounds good. Right?

//You are strong, You are beautiful, You are enough//