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Feeling really upset about an awful coincidence

So I used to live in a country town, and I still consider it my home, even though I don't live there anymore, but problem is everyone knows everyone, and so I know a lot of private stuff about people that I didn't need to know, because people are gossips.

 

This means I know intricate details about the mental health issues of a local boy who works at the supermarket. I didn't ask about these things, but my parents were gossiping about it and they're very hard to forget.

 

This means I know how vulnerable he is (very) and now I feel bad because I was in the shops there yesterday, and I sighed to myself pretty loudly thinking about something very mundane like what I was gunna cook for dinner or the absolutely disastrous public transport sitch I'm in or something like that.

 

But now I feel bad because it was a very loud, sot of frustrated sigh, and I think I looked at him accidentally while I did it.

 

I can't be like "dude, sorry, that wasn't at you, I just dunno whether I wanna do tacos" because I don't know him and its also too late, but I know everything about him because people are gossips, and I know that with his MH issues and bullying and all of this other really personal stuff, that even that could really hinder him.

 

And now I feel bad.

 

I dunno if I'm venting or if I want advice, but I dunno, some acknowledgment that this isn't a really dumb thing to be worried about. I dunno it's making me feel really shit.

Re: Feeling really upset about an awful coincidence

@trashconverters  That doesn't sound like a dumb thing to be worried about to me at all. Honestly, i think it shows that you're really caring and thoughtful to be worried about if you might have negatively impacted him by accident. Heart I can see that you care a lot about other people and how they feel.

That being said, you've done nothing wrong. I think we've all done something similar at least once and it sucks, but there's a chance he might not have noticed or didn't interpret the sigh as being directed at him at all. You're definitely allowed to forgive yourself Heart Were you planning on doing anything to take your mind off of things?




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Re: Feeling really upset about an awful coincidence

It's not one of those things thats at the forefront of my mind and thats the whole problem because I'm not thinking about it and then my brain is like "hey remember what happened yesterday?" and then I'll forget about it five minutes later. Its happened a few times today, and I can't say I like it.

Re: Feeling really upset about an awful coincidence

Hi @trashconverters,

 

Completely understand that feeling- sometimes our brains like to go back in time and remind us. I know that when I have an interaction with someone where my brain doubts if I did the right thing or if I could have done something different, sometimes it comes up for me even days later when I least expect it to. When that thought comes up and you are reminded of the supermarket, is there anything that helps you work through that thought or get through that moment?

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