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Help with seeking help

I've known for awhile now why I'm so terrified/against seeking out professional help. It's because I believe that, no matter what strategies or ideas they might give me to help my situation, it is me who has to implement those strategies and it is me take that last step and I am terrified that I can't do that. I'm terrified that in the final step, the step of me making those changes and using those strategies, I just won't do it and it'll all be for nothing. 

That was a bit more dramatic-sounding than I had hoped for. But I do have a flair for dramatics Smiley Tongue


Basically, I was wondering what other people have done in this situation. Is it easy to follow the advice of a professional? What happens when you don't? Can they help if you're afraid? 


Re: Help with seeking help

@N1ghtW1ng You're right that ultimately you have to make the changes yourself. No can force you. That doesn't mean others can't help, particularly professionals.


What you've described sounds like a pretty common fear in the long list of fears that people have in going to a professional, and despite those fears, get better. Professionals are used to dealing with all sorts of fears in help seeking and they can definitely help you if you're afraid to work through that. I've certainly had times where I'm afraid I'll never get better, with or without professional help, but I honestly don't know where I'd be and possibly if I'd even still be here if it weren't for professional help. I'm also as stubborn as they come, so although I try to be a pretty polite and compliant patient, different professionals have done a great job getting through to me and my stubborness and making changes happen!


Sometimes it takes a few people to find the right person for you and getting help does involve a certain amount of work to explore your thoughts and feelings and implement strategies to manage them. That doesn't mean it's unachievable and being afraid certainly doesn't mean you won't be able to do it. Ultimately, professionals are trained to help you and they can make a huge difference and you never know until you try! I resisted progessional help for a long time but I'm so glad now that I got that help! Smiley Happy


Re: Help with seeking help

I think @Randomness has hit the nail on the head.


It can take time to find the right treatment and often they are used to dealing with the anxiety and fears involved in treatment but you've already taken a big positive step posting this here, so you are doing things to help yourself. 


I always find with medical things such as this it can be hard to make a huge life shift overnight but they won't expect you too. It's a process and the little things you start changing like breathing along the way help the larger picture and eventually they all add up. 


Re: Help with seeking help

@N1ghtW1ng great question.


I don't think you realise how common your feelings are. Most people I know are afraid to seek help and implement what they discuss with a psychologist. IT'S HARD! I GET THAT SO MUCH! 


You're first question - is it easy to follow a professional's advice? It depends on what it is, I guess. Sometimes the strategies we read online to help with anxiety for example can seem to hard to even try. So when you work with a professional, remember you have the right and duty to yourself to work on achieve stuff. if you need to take things in baby steps then go ahead and tell your support that. It's great for them to know that stuff otherwise they might thing you're all good to swim in the deep end straight away. 


Your second question - what happens when you don't? Then back to the drawing board. If you think about any other condition that requires support, many many clients don't follow their professional's advice straight away. Athletes might return to running too soon, against their doc's recommendations, so it's back to the drawing board for their injury recovery. Alcoholics might have a drink but that doesn't mean their treatment stops! Back to the drawing board. Same with mental health stuff. 


Your 3rd question - Can they help if you're afraid? My answer to that is - everyone is afraid of something. It doesn't mean you shouldn't receive great care. And it's ok to be afraid. You can still make positive changes in your life. 


As someone who has put off seeking help, sought help, and felt enormous relief because of it, I can only recommend it even if you are afraid. I was afraid when I sought help too Smiley Happy