Hi everyone, I'm back.

[musicfan_xo]

I guess I should go off here, it seems like whatever I do, nothing is right. I try to be supportive and nothing seems good enough. I give up trying to get any help for myself. I'm not going to see professionals anymore because I don't even feel up to it and I'm staying at home more and more because of this depressing, boring, lonely town (only good thing is the scenery and bird life where I walk). I'm so depressed and no one can help me, even professionals. I give up, I can't take it anymore. I'm safe but I just have nothing to live for.

[Lost_Space_Explorer5]

Hey @musicfan_xo, I'm sorry you're feeling unheard and like nothing you do works. That can be such a frustrating and isolating feeling. Could you tell me a little bit more about what's been going on for you on the forums and with your supports that's led to you feeling this way?

I know in the past when I've felt like shutting down and pushing all my supports away I found it helpful to look at what kind of mindset I was in. And to question whether it was a mindset that was actually helping me get through the situation. I was feeling alone and misunderstood and I realised pushing everyone away would only make me feel more alone and misunderstood.

Feeling like no one and nothing can help is brutal and not something you should suffer with alone. You're not alone, we're here for you to listen if you want us to. I appreciate that you haven't found anything has helped so far, but I still have hope and I can hold that hope for you until you can hold it for yourself again. I'm glad to hear your safe but it still sounds really intense to have nothing to live for. We really care about you. We're real people here who really do care. I remember when I first came on the forums you offered me some support and then we didn't hear from you in a long time, but I was so happy hearing back from you and that you were okay! That's just one example that even if you don't believe it, we do care. Of course it's up to you what you do next but I really hope you're okay and safe and that you treat yourself with the same kindness you show everyone else here

[Andrea-RO]

I don't know if I can say anything that @Lost_Space_Explorer5 hasn't already said, but I fully agree. It sounds like you've been feeling a bit low recently and that seems to have translated to you beating yourself up a bit and second guessing some of your interactions here on RO. I do want to reassure you that we all want the best for you, and we'll always be around to support us when you need it