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My relationship with Porn( trigger warning)

Hey reach out, 

 

Please reach out to mods If this is mentally distressing.

 

Life line : 13 14 11

 

 

I'm making a shedule soon when to post so I can keep track of replies and what I'm saying on this space to clear up confusion.

 

I watch porn to escape life's problems however it has left me to neglect my own problems and other needs like being physically social, assessing my own life and knowing a person as a person and not their online image.

 

They're just such public people. With social media so accessible they have an invasive presence (* cough* twitter ). 

 

They are @@@not bad people but I have a hard time avoiding them when I should.

 

It's like their in my living room after uni. And oh there you are.

 

This is not good for a problematic user like myself where excitement and comfort is a click away and most of the time free.

 

Recently there was a well known one who had mental health issues and has sadly taken her own life. In January I believe.

 

It was not handled with dignity by her peers on social media.

 

They may actually have worked too hard and not able to cope or have that mental barrier.

 

I reflected and thought, okay this changes the way I look at porn then. 

 

I wrote down the name of each performer I watched (with pen &paper) and put it away in a cupboard and decided to leave them alone.

 

This has deterred me from relapsing as I'm mindful it's like spending time with a person in an artificial way and I should priotize social sports where I'll be around actual people and not their images on social media or even music festivals. 

 

It sounds too ideal but It can lead to a more structured behavior for me by leaving the habit ? 

 

Have people here had problematic usage with porn & methods to deal with it ?

 

How do we treat social influencers cause we made it into a thing ?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Re: My relationship with Porn( trigger warning)

Heya @BunnyWalks thanks for sharing and also thank you for the trigger warning Smiley Happy Very thoughtful. I think it's really beautiful and reflective to consider the wellbeing of the whole industry and be so impacted by the porn star who took their life.

 

Porn is very common, many people use porn to fulfill their own desires. There are a tonne of articles online regarding ethical porn use, there's one here as well. Have you had a look into any of the info regarding ethical porn? Just know it's okay to have all these urges, and you're not alone Heart

Awesome idea about social sports! Have you got any thoughts regarding the kinds of sports you want to engage in?

Re: My relationship with Porn( trigger warning)

Hi @BunnyWalks! Welcome to RO, I don't think I've 'spoken' to you on here before Smiley Happy Thanks for the TW, I appreciated it. 

 

Porn is definitely something a lot of young people are impacted by. It sounds like you feel like porn has caused you problems with neglecting yourself and your irl relationships; it's awesome that you can recognise that something has become a problem for you and that you want to change things for the better Smiley Happy

From what I know of the porn industry in general it can be an industry that exploits and harms a lot of people, which is sounds like you've been really considerate of as well! 

Kids Helpline have an interesting article on the impact of porn - impacts of pornography  - and ages ago we had a chat about it on here as well - Let's talk about porn

 

You describe wanting to connect with others offline which can be such a rewarding experience imo! Are there any hobbies or anything that you're interested in, like a sport or a craft? Meetup has a bunch of groups that you could be interested in, or volunteering for a cause you care about is always a great way to get involved and connect with others. 

 

Porn use is something I struggle with as well. The thing that has helped me most is reflecting on why I used it and the effect it was having on me as it made me realise how deeply it was hurting me. Having some go-to distractions is also really helpful - anything engaging or interesting that I can focus my attention on. I can talk more about my experience if that would help you but I don't want to take over your thread Smiley Happy 

Re: My relationship with Porn( trigger warning)

Hey @Bree-RO ,

Right now I should I want to have less porn in to my life and focus on having physical friends and understand pornstars are a business and their working. I don't want anymore and 2019 can be a break for me.🙅 I mean it.

So it's not a bad thing to have these feelings of wanting someone ?

I'm not sure with them am I talking to the personality/business or the person the online world does not make that clear. 🤔

A sport or activity that's about the socializing instead of the actual sport. 🙌

I was looking into is there a time friendly version or touch football or cycling club or even learning a skill I want to via reddit ?

The idea is to substitute this behavior instead of depending on porn to satisfy me.

Also you're really cool about this,Bree. I appreciate that 😌.

Re: My relationship with Porn( trigger warning)

Hey @DruidChild, I've seen your post but I will reply on a weekend.

I'm trying to work with shedule and have some sleep. Please be patient okay?