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Quarter Life Crisis

Hi, 

 

I've never posted on anything like this before but I've recently been struggling with some anxiety and mild depression and I thought maybe talking to people on a forum would help. Sorry if it's a bit long.

 

I turned 25 this year and I quit my job, which I was bored at and it was making me depressed, and I made the decision to go and solo travel. I spent two months in America and met so many amazing people, did some incredible things and saw beautiful sites and I really thought I was finding myself again, rediscovering my self confidence and stepping out of my comfort zone. 

 

I've been home for two months, I live with my parents, and I'm unemployed as a result of this travel. At first, it wasn't an issue but lately I can't seem to motivate myself to do much of anything, applying for new jobs scares me, I'm lethargic and moody. My parents are worried but they're hard to talk to without it turning into an interrogation about why I haven't applied for more jobs etc. That I just need to do something and it'll work out, I know they mean well and it's from a good place but they don't really understand. 

 

I know what I want, I can see myself in the scope of a "5 year plan" but I just can't seem to start taking the steps to get there. It's frustrating and I wish I understood more about why I can't seem to hit "apply" for these jobs, and I'm angry at myself for going backwards after doing so well to take charge only a few months ago. I guess I thought that this would be easier. 

 

I feel a little better getting some of that out so I'm glad I found a forum to post to. 

 

 

Re: Quarter Life Crisis

Hey @Emz215 thanks heaps for sharing, this community can definitely function as a decent sounding board for feeling stuck.

 

Well done on travelling and stepping out of your comfort zone. It's definitely not uncommon to feel pretty limbo-esque when returning from travel. Travel inspires us to explore ourselves and our surrounds, and coming back to no job to encourage you to get straight back into the flow of things definitely does make it challenging. Sounds like you are pretty into US culture, would you consider moving there? I am just wondering maybe if you raise the stakes, ie - moving overseas, the desire to apply for those jobs may be more intense. I think it could also be interesting to explore what is beneath the "apply" button pause. Are you looking at jobs you're not really interested in? Maybe jobs you're being told to go for but you don't really want? Is it fear you're not good enough, or just general disinterest?

 

I am going to tag some RO crew for you too Smiley Happy

@DruidChild @N1ghtW1ng  @FootyFan26 @Bee

Re: Quarter Life Crisis

Hi @Emz215 and welcome to RO Smiley Happy It sounds like things have been really difficult since you got back home; I imagine that it must be a big adjustment going from travelling and being independent and experiencing new things, to coming back to living with your parents and feeling that pressure to get a job. I can empathise with the frustration of being unemployed and being afraid of job hunting, it can be a very scary thing. 

 

I wonder what kinds of things you have as long term goals (you mentioned a five year plan)? Do you still feel passionate about those things? Maybe there's another way to achieve those goals that you hadn't considered and that feels more in line with what you want. 

 

Was there anything that you particularly enjoyed in America? Or was it more just trying new things and seeing beautiful places? I know that some people just need a high level of stimulation in their lives to feel well - perhaps trying some new things could help you feel happier in yourself? 

Re: Quarter Life Crisis

Hi @Bree-RO

 

Thanks for replying. I really enjoyed my trip to the states but I've never really wanted to move over seas, maybe it's because everything in America seems to turbulent right now politically and socially, but mostly I do love Perth and being close to my family. I did look into working overseas for a little while but considering my desire to get out of hospitality it became difficult to consider starting a new career without experience in another country. 

 

I've always struggled with what I want to do, I've never really had a passion the way some of my friends have always wanted to be an actor or a doctor/lawyer etc. I have a rough idea now of what I want to do but I think I'm disheartened by all the job adds repeating "requires 2 years experience" or "candidates without experience will not be considered." 

 

The plan that I have is to find a casual job to get some income and start taking short courses to build my resume and experience the basics of the job as well as improve my chances at getting hired. As far as I can tell I'm avoiding it because I'm scared of really starting my adult life for real and stepping away from the comfort that hospitality provided. 

Re: Quarter Life Crisis

Hi @DruidChild,

 

Thanks for the warm welcome Smiley Happy. It has been difficult coming home, I feel like I'm stalling and in the process disappointing my parents that are supporting me, and have been since I made the decision to quit my job. They want me to be happy but they're worried I'm not applying myself, and they aren't wrong. 

 

Long term goals, I want to own my own place. I still want that, and I know that in order to get there I need to find work and start saving but it's taking that initial leap that seems to be holding me up. I seem to be aware that getting work will start the ball rolling, and I know that it'll be a domino effect of things falling into place but it seems to be a hurdle, mentally, that I'm struggling with. 

 

America is a beautiful place, it was definitely about me taking steps to stand on my own two feet and be alone on the other side of the world to test my independence and resilience, how I would do making new friends and trying new things. It's frustrating knowing that I did all that successfully only a few months ago but now seem to have difficulty with day to day things. 

 

I've been considering finding a volunteer position as a way to meet new people because I've recently been ending toxic friendships to try and start fresh so I think that will be on the list once I tackle the job issue. 

Re: Quarter Life Crisis

HI @Emz215 Welcome to Reachout Smiley Happy

Looking for work can feel daunting at times, and it can be so disheartening and discouraging to constantly read "requires 2 years experience" or "candidates without experience will not be considered." I am trying to gain work within an accounts type role and the experience part is a huge barrier for me also. I've tried looking at work experience roles to gain experiences and have been told no by businesses as well. Some have offered it, but it was either the wrong time (as I'd just gone in for foot surgery and they were an upstairs place with no lift!) or the business was the wrong culture and I couldn't see myself thriving (let alone coping).

I wonder if you have even thought about reaching out to a job services place for support? I'm currently with a disabilty job search employment agency (due to my mental health) and I have found them good at helping me through some of the work stuff Smiley Happy

Volunteer work is absolutely a great idea, especially if there's lots of oppourtunities around you Smiley Happy

DO you have any idea of what field you'd like to work in?

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Quarter Life Crisis

Hi @Bee

 

I finished a certificate three in business administration earlier this year and have been looking into junior reception work or administration roles. I'm leaning towards medical reception because it seems interesting and diverse so my plan was to do some short courses to boost my resume while finding a casual job in between. This seems like the easiest way to stay productive I guess.

 

The pressure from my parents is making me stressed. My Mum tells everyone she knows about my job situation so they all now have ideas and suggestions, one of her friends called last night to say she's heard of a job at an accounting firm that might be coming up. I appreciate the thought but now my parents are pressuring me to send my resume to them for the experience when maths is probably my worst subject (other than my sense of direction ha-ha). Dad's already called me this morning to ask if I've applied for it yet, but there isn't a job ad, its just a piece of gossip. 

 

I know they're doing it out of love and they worry and i shouldn't be knocking back help but the pressure is making me feel sick, to the point where I don't want to spend time with them so I can avoid talking about it. 

 

As far as job search agency's - I have thought about it but I've had difficulty trying to find one that might be suitable. Do you have any suggestions? Thanks x

Re: Quarter Life Crisis

@Emz215 Short courses sound great! Smiley Happy
If you're thinking about medical reception definately try and get a statement of attainment in development medical administration skills to boost your application, I did and the practice manager was impressed I'd done it. While I didn't get that job - it came down to a few things, it was nice to know that that particular qualification helped my application Smiley Happy

Ohh the pressure can be intense sometimes hey? I have similar at times too! I actually had my physio telling me about potential job oppourtunities last year when seeing her! They mounted to nothing of course because it was similar to what you are saying above about it being "thinking about putting someone on"
I would still give it a go, from my understanding a receptionist role in an accounting firm wouldn't have a whole lot to do with numbers in regards to the accounting stuff, so if you're keen it wouldn't hurt, but at the same time if you're feeling it's not for you there's no pressure from me Smiley Happy

I wonder if you could talk to your parents about how the pressure to find a job is feeling overwhelming?
Sometimes as humans we can overlook the pressure side of it and feel like we are helping by notifying those around us looking for work of vacancies

As for job agencies, in talking to friends they vary from town to town and state to state.
If you would like to pursue a job agency,
I would do a bit of investigating and see what job agencies are in your town, and try to gather a bit of information about them. Some work hand in hand with centrelink and you have to go through centrelink to utilise their services, where as sometimes there are private ones and they would be different again.
I would also think about what you want / need from a job agency, and use them as fielding questions to see if they will be a good fit for you.

I hope this helps Smiley Happy <3

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Quarter Life Crisis

Hey @Emz215

 

In my past I was an admin worker and I actually completed my Cert. 3 in Business (exact same course just minus the typing and Microsoft access work) and I thought I would chime with my experiences.

  • First things first get on Centrelink they will then provide you with an employment agency (you can switch if you don't like them) and a payment to help you while you look for work. As @Bee said if you have a disability such as a mental illness you can actually apply to go to a disability employment agency that specialises with people with barriers and who need extra help in finding a job. 
  • In order to be a medical receptionist you unfortunately need an actual certificate in medical reception in order due to the terminology and specific data bases they use. TAFE do these courses along with a few private education places.  It might be worth looking into if you're interested in that area. 
  • There's this thing called cold canvassing which is basically where you send your resume (either by email or in person) to businesses that need workers in your qualification area. A lot of jobs aren't actually advertised and if they like your resume they will keep it on file in case a job comes up. Also word of mouth is another way how positions are filled, so what you're parents is actually really awesome as if anyone needs a receptionist they might think of you and you can apply for it before it comes online. 
  • Christmas casual positions are getting advertised now and they are worth applying for. They only last a few months and in that time you can still apply for other jobs and your parents will get off your case if only temporarily.
  • Sign up to a temp agency as we get into the festive season a lot of people go on leave so they need workers to fill in for their receptionists. It's also a great way to build up experience and get a feel for what area you want to go into.
  • I always get told that while your unemployed/looking for work volunteering is a great way to pass the time, plus it also looks good on your resume and opens up doors to potential jobs. 

Unfortunately the job market is tough everywhere and for a lot of admin jobs you are up against 400 plus applicants but stick it out and hopefully you will get a job soon Smiley Happy 

 

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Whatever it takes I know I can make it through!

Re: Quarter Life Crisis

Excellent points @ErinsAntics!

I wasn't aware of needing the certificate of Medical Administration to work as a medical receptionist, I learnt something tonight Smiley Happy It makes sense the more I think about it though!

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart