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Jaz

Social Fear

When put in a crowd with over five people, I get scared, I panic, my brain goes blank, and the only thing I am able to think of is that  I am being judged. I did research and realized I am not the only one, out there. I am desperate to change this as my career choice will require me to meet and deal with people on a daily basis.  What are the best ways for me to overcome this fear?

Re: Social Fear

Hey Jaz,

Well done in posting this Smiley Happy Asking for help shows strength Smiley Happy

Personally anxiety isn't one thing I'm particularly good at dealing with. I too find it nerve wracking to be in front of larger groupd of people.
I try to remind myself that some fears like judgement are often an over exageration. If I'm meeting new people or talking to someone I haven't spoken to often I try to tell myself that they are probably just as nervous as myself.
I take deep breathes, when I get anxious I find deep breathing helps to relax me a little bit. If I'm infront of a crowd, I'll turn to face no one and breathe in and out, I just try to keep myself calm and tell myself ok this is the situation, you'll do fine.

Of coursethis doesn't always work and foten I'm just left feeling terrible, which is no good either, but we learn as we go along.

I think that if it's impacting a huge deal on your life (which it sounds as though it is) I would recommend talking to someone, this could be a doctor or a counsellor. I'm not sure if you're still in school but if you are (or even at TAFE or Uni) there is often a counsellor working there which you can contact to help you out. There is also services such as Kids Help Line. You can phone them on 1800 55 1800, their phones are easy to get through to a counsellor (so Iv'e heard), they offer web and email counselling too, but web takes a while to get through sometimes, I've waited a few hours+ to get through, so if you want to talk to someone quickly phones is probably the easiest way, and their email counselling often takes about 2 weeks to get a reply. Eheadspace is a similar service, they can get quite busy too with their web chat, (and personally I like the layout of KHL better) but they are good aswell, and you have to sign up first.

I'f this seems just a little too daunting don't worry, they are both used to having people being nervous at first... It took me several months to transfer from email to web counselling. I was so nervous when I first used web counselling I closed off and couldn't think. But I've learned that they only know what I tell them and only know what I've already told them, they cannot see me and therefore have no idea of who I am.
There is some factsheets on anxiety on the sire here aswell, I'm not sure if you've read them but if you go to the top and hover your mouse over 'tough times' a drop down bar thing will come up and you can click on anxiety right under there and hae a look Smiley Happy

I hope this hass helped in someway Smiley Happy & let us know how you get on Smiley Happy

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart
Jaz

Re: Social Fear

Thank You Bee, 

 

It is good to hear that there are people who help out there. I have just finished university, but I will try the helplines you have mentioned. I am already feeling positive about this, and some of the conversation on this fourm are opening a sliver lining. I just hope this is a start for a new change.

 

Thanks once again for the help =D 

Re: Social Fear

Hey Jaz,
That's great that you've finished uni, and it's good that you're willing to try the helplines Smiley Happy And always remember there is a local doctor too that you can talk to Smiley Happy

& that's really good that you find the conversations herre helpful Smiley Happy
(Seeing your reply had brightened my afternoon, thanks Smiley Happy )
Good luck Smiley Happy x

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Social Fear

Hi Jaz,

Feeling anxious in social situations is very common. A good factsheet you can check out on the Reach Out website is this one here: http://au.reachout.com/Social-phobias

As Bee has already mentioned, there are some great helplines you can ring to get advice and support or web counselling options. There are a range of different options for help with social anxiety. A GP can be a good place to start and they can refer you to people like psychologists who can do one to one counselling with methods such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. Group programs can also be helpful, although it may seem scary to talk and share a part of yourself in front of a group, you'll be with other people who share the same fears and anxieties and it can be helpful to hear a range of perspectives.

Things you can do to try and help yourself include trying out different relaxation techniques to try to reduce anxiety. Things like breathing exercises and progressive muscle relaxation you could look up and try to do yourself.

Though anxiety feels awful at the time you're experiencing it, try to remember that it does pass and can be overcome.
Highlighted

Re: Social Fear

Breathing deeply helps as your heart rate slows and you can think more clearly. Thinking about the anxiety when you are alone and not under pressure may help as you can examine your thoughts and reactions more closly and you can create some distance.    

Jaz

Re: Social Fear

Hellloo Bee, 

 

I am happy to hear that, that has brightend your afternoon, its a sign that there are good people out in the world.  I spoke to my older sister about this group and she is also very happy for me! 

I always belived that glasses made me look really ugly, therefore, I never wore it out in public. But today, with the help pf self talk, I went to the bank and did some shopping with my glasses on. I felt so good. I thought of sharing it today.

 

But once again thank you!

Jaz

Re: Social Fear

Helloo Cassie!

 

Thank You for the factsheet, I have read it and will also keep it in mind, and about the group therapy, I am considering joining one.. ..

 

Yes, I have been looking for some relaxation techniques. I was considering having quite and light music playing in my headphones, as music helps me relax, and thanks to my long hair, I can hide the headphones. But I will also look out for more breathing techniques. 

 

I am waiting for the day I am able to overcome my anxiety, and do what I love the most! =D

Jaz

Re: Social Fear

Helloo Shadow, 

 

Thank you for the advice, I will try that exercise. I have bought my self a diary, i will write everthing down and examine my experiances! 

 

Thanks once again!

 

Re: Social Fear

@Jaz; Thats great Smiley Happy I was the same when I first started wearing my glasses, it took me about 3-4 years before I really let it be known that I needed glasses, I was so ashamed. But now I have different frames I'm so much more comfortable with them Smiley Happy

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart