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Unwanted Guests

Hey RO

So this hasn't happened to me at any time but it may so I want to know what to do if it does. Say I was hosting a party at my house. Just some really good friends, nothing bad is happening, noone is off their face on anything and nothing illegal is happening, everyone is legal drinking age and drinks used are nothing crazy, just everyone is having a good time hanging out. Now, some people who I don't want at the party turn up. I'll give a few scenarios for you just to be safe.

 

1) People who turn up I know but do not like and do not want in my house, let alone at the party. I ask them to leave but they kind of just laugh and refuse. They don't act aggressive but when I ask them to leave they say something like "Too bad" or "I don't care." They may also be bringing illegal stuff like drugs which I really want nothing to do with.

2) People who turn up I do know and do not like. I ask them to leave and they act hostile and aggressive towards me. Basically try to pick a fight. Drug situaiton may also apply.

I'm guessing if I don't them and neither does anyone else I can call the police to say they are trespassing. So how can I deal with the other scenarios? I don't want any kind of trouble or fights at all and calling police would be my final resort.

Re: Unwanted Guests

Hey @drhalloween , no one likes a party crasher! In both situations you can call the police, it is your house after all! However, just remember that a lot of these tense and uncomfortable situations can be defused if you just remain calm and friendly (even if you aren't feeling that way!).  If someone is really intent on picking a fight, just remain relaxed and assertive and call the police.

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Re: Unwanted Guests

I usually try to be nice. Just "sorry guys but this is a private party" and then if they persist "Come on guys. This isn't cool."
It's more if they just simply won't listen at all and kinda just brush stuff off
In that case, is it suitable to call the police? I don't want to cause a scene or ruin the party

Re: Unwanted Guests

Hey @drhalloween, if someone is on your property and won't leave and you feel unsafe then you can call the police. however, it can sometimes take the police a little while to get there, and what if the situation escalates in the meantime. I think it could be good to have some conflict resolution skills up your sleeve that you can use to try and diffuse the situation.


- Appear calm, centered and self-assured even if you don’t feel it. Relax facial muscles and look confident. 
- Use a modulated, low monotonous tone of voice (our normal tendency is to have a high pitched, tight voice when scared).
- Do not be defensive-even if the comments or insults are directed at you, they are not about you. 
- Be reassured that you can always call the police if you need to

- Make sure you have some sober level headed friends with you - but don't gang up on the crashers

 

I also found this that you might find helpful: http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-With-Party-Crashers

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