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Re: Weekly Wellbeing: Supporting and Connecting With Others

@StormySeas17  That sounds so frustrating! It can feel like someone is not really listening when they just respond in one or two words rather than reflecting what you've said. People can also do that when they respond to someone else telling them good news, such as when they just say, 'okay' or 'good.'
The main thing I would suggest is being open about what you feel and want from that person. There are some articles I've used a few times on the ReachOut website about how to have difficult conversations. Sometimes you can also prompt them to talk about the issue further, such as by revealing more about it or saying, 'What do you mean by 'aww'?'.
It can also be really invalidating when people share a similar problem of theirs rather than how they've actually dealt with it. Smiley Sad I feel like I've been guilty of that a few times! Sometimes, you can try to steer the conversation by empathising with them and then saying, 'I'd like to share more about what I'm going through if you don't mind'. or 'Do you have any advice for me?'

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Re: Weekly Wellbeing: Supporting and Connecting With Others

Hmmmm yeah @StormySeas17 I definitely get where you're coming from with those two issues and I can say that I have been on the receiving end of similar things myself! 

 

That's a hard one about your partner, considering you have already tried to voice your concern to them about it in the past. I guess the only things I can suggest would be to keep reminding them that you really don't find that language ('aww') helpful and remind them every time they use it - it has to get through to them eventually right? You could really emphasise to them how it makes you feel and perhaps suggest things for them to say that would be more helpful to you? That, or if you find this only really happens over text you could reserve getting serious issues off your chest for when you can talk to them about it over the phone or in person? 

 

Along the same lines of what @WheresMySquishy said, if you know that your friends are often guilty of turning the conversation onto themselves when you try to come to them with a problem you could try and get in there proactively, before you have even initiated the conversation, and say something like 'Hey, I have this issue that I really need to talk to you about it, would you mind if I have just ten minutes to vent about myself?'. That can really strongly signal to them how you want the conversation to work and may mean that they're going to be more focused on supporting you.

Let me know what you think about these suggestions - I'm genuinely very interested to know if you think they would work or I'm waffling a bunch of nonsense Smiley Very Happy

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Re: Weekly Wellbeing: Supporting and Connecting With Others

Hey @WheresMySquishy @recharging_introvert thank you so much for your suggestions! Yes it's very frustrating when you know the person cares but you just don't feel like you're getting through to them Smiley Sad I think asking them why they're saying certain things would definitely help! Also redirecting the conversation sounds like a good idea. Maybe saying something like 'I understand you've had similar experiences but I want to talk about my own feelings now' would work too. My dad loves to pull the 'its okay you've had a bad day, I've had a bad day too' and my eyes roll into my head because it's like... you were so keen to say something you just overshadowed me! But I know he does care. Sometimes you need to give people the benefit of the doubt and ask if they're really hearing you I think!