What to say to your S.O.'s worries about high school
Me and my SO are undergrads. I recently found out my SO started talked to me about a few months ago (during summer) he met up with his friend from when they were in high school together. They started reminiscing about their high school lives and at some point of the conversation my SO said how much high school sucked for him. To his impression, his friend had a good time when he was in high school and asked along the lines of "Aw come on, didn't you at least have a some nice memories with your friends or your favorite teachers?". He said 'no' to him. He did hung out with friends and stuff but he can't think of any fond memories at all and they both started to have a bit of tension so they stopped talking about that subject. Ever since then, he was really bothered by it till he couldn't bottled it up anymore and talked to me about it. Whenever high school is brought up with his friends it seems to him that they have good memories to talk about except for him. I think he became really bothered by it as if, if it's really wrong or bad to have not-so-very fond memories of high school.
I really want to lessen his burden about those thoughts by saying "it's ok to feel that way, everyone experience it differently. Many people are even glad to manage to have graduated from high school". I asked him if he wants to talk about it more and he said "yeah, maybe another time." I would like to know what more can I say or do to comfort him.
P.s. we didn't go to the same high school together and we both come from different countries.
I can hear how much you care about this person it sounds like you are wanting to validate his experience and let him know it’s okay to have a different experience of school to his friends.
Reading what you want to say to him, I actually think it is spot on! Being there and letting him know it’s okay to feel how he is feeling is super important. Experiences in high school are so varied, and I am sure there are a lot of young people here that can relate to what he is feeling right now.
Has he brought the topic up again? Do you know if his friends from school are also concerned about the impact memories of school have had on him?
Your support for him is so incredible - he is very lucky to have someone so thoughtful his life We are here to support you if you ever want to bounce ideas off us