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is my little buddy a trans-gender?

hey, I have known a 17 y/o girl now for 6 months. She is a flatout tomboy: shorts, hoody, sneakers are her uniform. she has just come out to me & says she wishes she was a man. I straight away told her how "cool" I thought she was, how "proud I am of her & that I am always here for her. 

This is the strange bit... i'm completely in love with her & she knows this... now that I understand what she is feeling, I have to channel this feeling of overwhelming love into supporting her through the next phase (whatever that is) I am the very first person whom she has trusted with this info & I feel honoured (and completely confused)


Is there anything else I should be saying/doing for my little buddy?

Re: is my little buddy a trans-gender?

Hey Stafford,


I think you are doing the right thing, by being supportive of her. As long as you are by her side and are supportive of her then you are doing it right. 



Re: is my little buddy a trans-gender?

Hi @stafford 


Welcome to Like @N1ghtW1ng has said, it's great that you are being supportive and you should keep it up! I wouldn't be jumping to conclusions as to whether your friend is transgender. It's understood that this situation would be fairly confusing for you, particularly with your friend entrusting information to you and the feelings that you have for them. I believe that being there for them and keeping an open mind would help your friend. it would mean that you're willing to help out without any kind of bias or judgement. 

Stay excellent

Re: is my little buddy a trans-gender?

I agree with @Myvo that what your friend is or isn't is probably jumping ahead a bit. There are lots of potential categories but, really, it's up to your friend if they even want to be in one of those categories. Who you are is something you define for yourself.


Be supportive; listen whenever you can; do whatever you can to help your friend be whatever they feel most comfortable being. Smiley Happy

Re: is my little buddy a trans-gender?

wierdly i had a mate that went through this situation apart from being in love with said person .

trans gender is becoming less and less taboo , quite recently the lead singer of a band called against me

changed from a guy to a girl . so its becoming more common . as for my mate that went through it she started as a she

and now sees her self as a he . (i think thats how u say that sentence ). its fine he has a girlfriend and a job n people just kinda excepted it . so it will work out for your friend if she has a good support network and has good friends . as for u being love with her you just have to wait that out buddy


Re: is my little buddy a trans-gender?

ohh and i agree that you shouldnt jump to conclusions that she trans gender Smiley Happy i just thought i should cover all bases

Re: is my little buddy a trans-gender?

hey @stafford 

just wanted to say that what you have done is really admirable, putting your own feelings aside to fully be there for a friend is really amazing and you should be proud of yourself Smiley Happy Well done!

Re: is my little buddy a trans-gender?

@stafford  i love your attitude and support towards your friend, definitely an admirable feature you have to be so accepting and understanding. I also agree not to rush into assuming anything about your friend just yet, during teens people go through so many phases and emotions so you never know what she will feel next. Although you have known her for 6 months give her some time and whatever decision she makes you will be there to support her and that is very important Smiley Happy  

Keep up the support!