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Re: Calling kHL

Thanks Pillow and Jay-Dee.

Jay-Dee, LOL that first line made me chuckle! You're probably right in that it was a panic attack, it was so long ago, I don't even recall it now!
That is one of my biggest things I try to work around each and every day - not beating myself up over things. I am yet to master that one... at any time.

And you're right it is so much harder. And I do have that determination, it's in me somewhere, I just need to get the courage to shine at the same time...
I will copy and paste what I've said above to my reg counsellor when I speak to her next on web, or email it if it so happens.


We reflected on the joys of 2019

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Calling kHL

I'm going to agree with what a lot of people are saying about being able to cover more stuff, it can also mean that you can go into more detail and really work at it.


I agree, a looooooooong time ago, I just emailed a KHL counsellor for a while (not even web chat) and that counsellor suggested that I call her. I distinctly remember the overwhelming anxiety that followed up to me actually calling her, it took me a while to talk myself into it... and I'm really glad I did. Believe me, it's very much worth it. I developed a really awesome relationship with her and after a while I found it so easy to tell her anything.


Long story short, 10/10 would recommend Smiley Happy


Also, if you are just really nervous and don't want to jump straight into the 'serious stuff', your first few calls can just be light hearted talks, getting to know eachother, etc. No pressure.


Now, I'm going to share my best tips to calming down (they may or may not work for you, I've found them pretty good)

  • Deep breathing. Sounds pretty obvious, right? Well, when you're panicking, it's easy to take short, fast breaths. It's really helpful to stop, close your eyes, and really focus on each breath. Breath in for 5 (or 3 if 5 is too much) and out for 5 (or 3). It helps if you count in your head and really just focus on that. 
  • Write it out. Journals are EPIC. I swear I've filled at least 8 books since I was 14. I don't know why it helps, but just writing out how you feel can help.
  • Go for a walk. Exercise kills bad feels sometimes. Worth a try?
  • Distract yourself. Find yourself starting to stress out? Read a book, paint, shower, sew, cook, whatever! 


It may also be helpful to have maybe one web chat where you share how you feel about calling with the counsellor with them. Whatever you decide, don't feel too pressured to do it, but I have found that in order for things to get better, you have to step out of your comfort zone. 


Good luck with whatever you decide, I'm sure you can make the right choice for you Smiley Happy

Re: Calling kHL

Hey dreamcatcher,


Thank you for replying! 

Deep breathing, yes that helps. I found myself using that stragegy when getting my ears pierced on Monday! & Tonight!

I've been writting since 2011, and stored most of it online, which recently, hasn't been very helpful for me at all. I tend to over uhm think it? Over focus on the situation.

And yes I have had a session about calling, a couple months ago. And we touched on it the last time we spoke on web just recently.



In other news, I called tonight, a whole 5mins 42!!! I basically got straight through, wasn't much wait time. I DID manage to ask for my reg counsellor, though she wasn't able to talk tonight...  and is on again over the weekend.

I was told that she said it was really awesome that I managed to get through and call.


Though in doing this tonight, I don't understand or know how I managed to achieve that!

Just last night I had called and hung up as soon as someone answered!

Yet tonight I went through, and said I was fine to wait till the weekend to talk to her

Maybe using my tablet proves easier to call than my laptop as I'm able to hold it closer and it picks up my voice better, eg I don't have to scream at it Smiley Tongue


None the less, I got through! I managed to say hello and ask for counsellor!!! Despite my unrulely nerves, and objects on my desk moving and rattling as I shook.

I DID IT!  now to call back over the weekend and actually speak to her! Smiley Surprised



We reflected on the joys of 2019

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Calling kHL

Yay Bee that is so exciting Smiley Very Happy Smiley Very Happy! I'm so happy for you!!! I think that sometimes you have to try things a few times until you get comfortable, and then you can push yourself a bit further, so all of your earlier attempts probably helped you Smiley Happy. That's a shame that you couldn't talk to your counsellor though. Using the tablet to call sounds like a good idea, you're right it probably does pick up your voice better.


Good luck with calling again on the weekend! Let us know how it goes Smiley Happy

Re: Calling kHL

Bee thats awesome well done!

Re: Calling kHL

Aww Bee that is so great to hear and I am glad you got through and I hope you get to talk to your reg counsellor soon Smiley Happy YAY!! 

**Believe in the power of you because you are your own hero**

Re: Calling kHL

@delicatedreamer yepp, I'm going to agree with you on that, deffinately have to try things to get comfortable with them! I don't see is as bad that I didn't get to talk to my reg counsellor, I most likely would have hung up on her.. Smiley Tongue I knew by the end it was enough...


Thanks @hartley_ & @ruenhonx I'll try again tomorrow night, hopefully I get through to her Smiley Happy I'll keep you all posted 


Ps, 7 high fives on my last post!! Now that makes it feel like an accomplishment! Smiley Very Happy Also puts some of those negative thoughts back in place Smiley Happy


We reflected on the joys of 2019

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Calling kHL

My counsellor did this as well, and I was like you and really apprehensive about it. The first time I called was really strange, and I felt really awkward. That was over a year ago and now I feel totally comfortable about it. Some weeks I've called as many as three times.

It can be really beneficial in a number of reasons. For me I feel like I'm able to go into a lot more detail and talk more in depth. It also means my counsellor can get a better feel of my tone and how I'm feeling - something that is hard to convey over typing! My counsellor is also on the phones a lot more regurlary than she is on web, which has really helped. You also don't have to wait in a queue for sometimes hours to talk to them, you can just call back when they're free Smiley Happy

I still do use web though, and sometimes even now it's too much for me to call my counsellor, but it has definitely helped me.

Hope this helps Smiley Happy

Re: Calling kHL

Excellent work Bee! I'm so happy that you were able to call! wooohoo! *sends out the biggest of hi5s*

Re: Calling kHL

I called but I hang up as soon as I callef