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Don't know anymore

I have been screwing up for a while now. Everything I do is always wrong. My family doesn't help me and I can't confide in them.
Whenever I try to do something right or if I go with my feelings I usually just get shut down.
I've had a few relationships and they've ended and it depresses me to know that no body wants me and I'm alone.
I recently started to have feelings for someone but I just let then take advantage of me and then he just stopped talking to me.
I sit at home waiting for someone to message or call me to see if I'm doing okay but it never happens.
I can never seem to have people care about my feelings or just me in general unless they want something in return.
I know I've done some stupid things and have pushed people away and eventually some of them never came back and moved on to be with and around a person better than me. It hurts to think that I have no one anymore. I sit at home at night and cry myself to sleep because I'm so lonely and feel worthless.
I've recently found myself looking up ways to die and it makes me so sad that it's come to this and I've dug myself in such a depression that I can't get myself get myself out if it. I don't know what to do anymore.

Re: Don't know anymore

Hi  @Babygirl 

 

How you're feeling is not uncommon. We all make mistakes and sometimes we're stuck with the results of those mistakes, even when that's probably the least helpful thing to happen.

 

Rather than waiting for people to contact you, why not contact them? Think of something you'd like to do (e.g. go to the movies, the beach, bowling) and call up some people and see if they want to join you. I used to do the same thing as you and it made me pretty miserable. When I started organising stuff myself, I found I'd start getting invites too.

When you do something for someone else, they sometimes feel obligated to do something for you in return; the key is that you need to do something for someone else first (and be prepared for them to not return the favour — but that's okay too!).

 

 

Looking up ways to die doesn't mean you have to do any of them, but it sounds like you do need to talk to someone about it one-on-one. You can give Kids Helpline a call on 1800 55 1800 — they're really good at handling the sorts of problems you're talking about.

 

Let us know how you go. Smiley Happy

Re: Don't know anymore

@Babygirl ,

 

It's really brave of you to be able to post this onto ReachOut. I just wanted to say that Lex has given some really good advice. Also, just because some people in your past has moved on to other people, it doesn't mean that they are better than you. I think it's not only brave but incredibly self-aware that you're able to know why it happened. A lot of people aren't able to do that.

 

Please let us know how you're doing!

 

Nathan

 

 

Re: Don't know anymore

Hi Babygirl,

Welcome to Reachout. Smiley Happy

I'm sorry to hear you've been feeling so alone. It's really a terrible feeling when you want someone to be there for you, and there's no-one there. I think Lex was right. You can't control how other people behave - you can't make them call you when you need them to. But what you can do is be there for the people you care about - be the person who calls and checks on them. It sounds corny, but you often get back what you give out, if that makes sense. And when you have a good relationship with someone - that is give *and* take - it will be ok for you to call them and say 'hey, i really a hug' or 'i really need to spend time with a friend right now - are you free?'.

In the meantime, we are here and happy to chat and hear how you are going. Keep ya chin up!

 

blithe