cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Fed up and tired

This is probably common. You may have heard of this before. But here I am.

I'm tired.
After 4 years in high school, I've finally reached the point where I can't take it anymore. The stress, it's beginning to take over and I can't seem to get a hold of myself and manage it like I use to. I don't know if I'm suffering from depression or anxiety, or maybe I'm just making a big deal out of everything. Who knows? On the outside, I look like I'm fine. Nobody really cares about me. I'm just another stranger walking the hallways of my school.
I'm quiet. I don't have the confidence others my age have but I'm sick of others especially other girls, treating me as if I'm incompetent and stupid. I stutter. I get nervous, ok? I'm patronised by people and I can't take it anymore. I thought I could tolerate them and ignore them, but I've reached my limit.
I've never seen anyone for help. Never talked to anyone. Suicide's never been an option for me.

I just needed to vent it out somewhere and I came across this site. Don't feel sorry for me. I just need some advice to deal with whatever I'm going through.

Thank you, for reading this far.

Re: Fed up and tired

hey @chick 

 

Welcome to Reach Out!!

 

High school is definitely a place that's very easy to get sick of. It can be a total nightmare for a lot of people and is often not very good at making people feel welcome of they don't fit into a particular shaped mold.

 

All I can say is, it end eventually and all of the coolest most interesting adults I've ever met where all ostracised and left out at high school. It seems like one of the ingredients someone needs to become a really awesome person is to not fit in during high school.

 

Meanwhile, something like this might help a bit. Maybe you could start a hobby outside of school and meet some new friends. You'll be amazed how the minute you feel fulfilled outside of high school, and no longer need them, they'll all be begging to hang out with you.

 

Let us know how you go. Smiley Happy

Re: Fed up and tired

@chick it sounds like with all the bullying happening to you at school because people see as weak that you maybe be suffering with a slight depression, as it clearly getting on top of you the comments and making fun people at your expense.

I dont know if you have tried confiding in the principal regarding the bullying and the problems these people are causing you and how much its affecting your everyday life, and what people dont understand is perhaps to them the comments are water off a ducks back, but these are the sort of things that push people to far...

I dont know If perhaps you could have your parents or guardian speak to someone at the school for you, regarding whats happening. 

Its always so easy to say to not let it get to you, but after being bullied and picked on my whole school life which led to having a nervous breakdown at the age of 15, I totally understand how tired and fed up that you are facing this everyday, the most important thing I can suggest is walk with head held high, and dont give these people the satisfaction by showing any retaliation to the comments or remarks, then pretty soon they will find someone else to pick on.

What drives these people I found is the kick they get out of your reaction and seeing how much they are hurting you..

Stay Strong, and be brave warrior don't allow these people to ruin your life..

Re: Fed up and tired

Hey @chick 

 

You know, there are some people who have the best years of their life in high school and some that don't. For me it was a bit of a combination of both. Looking back I would say there were lots of times where I couldn't stand to talk to the people around me. I would also say there were times that I was stressed beyond what I was capable of handling. But, today I'm here, and while high school wasn't all that great, my life has completely changed... and for the better.

 

Personally - I got through it by speaking to people outside of school. I met people who had nothing to do with my school or the area I live in and I got through it by taking comfort in them before, during and after school! It's those people that i'm still friends with today. Do you have any friends who don't go to your school that you could talk to or hang out with? Do you use any online chat or social pages to speak with other young people? (Eg tumblr).

 

While I know you might have originally come on here to vent it out, we are all actually pretty cool people. You should stick around and hang out with us over the next week and see how you like the forums. You can talk to us about whatever, play some games in the game section, just chat about casual stuff in the "hang out" section. Reckon this is something you would be interested in doing? Cat Happy

lanejane

Re: Fed up and tired

Hey @chick
Welcome to the forums, I just wanted to say how awesome it is that you've been able to come here and post! It can be really hard sometimes.

The other members have given you some really good advice, which I hope you are able to take on and run with.

High school was a pain the arse for me too! I also experienced bullying on and off throughout my schooling too. My biggest advice is to not discount the behaviour of these girls, they are bullying and if you can acknowledge this, you're going to benefit yourself. I always struggled to admit when people were bullying me, and it can be really hard to admit it. I think what the others said about talking to someone about it, is a really good idea.

(I'm not sure what else to say right now, but if I think of something else I'll come back and post again)
I hope this has helped in some way. Smiley Happy

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Fed up and tired

@Bee @lanejane @Sap0 @NigioC Thank you for all your advices, I cannot say how grateful I am to receive all these.

Yes, I really, really want to talk to someone about it and I've nearly done so. But what made me stop was this thought that my problem might not be as big as I'm making it seem, maybe there are far more important problems that people could be dealing with rather than my small, insignificant one.
I don't want to tell my parents because they just don't understand and they don't see any reason for me to be feeling tired, I should just be fine.
I don't want to tell any of my few friends because I don't want to put any burden on them or make them act differently around me.
And I don't want to tell one of my teachers because it's not like any of them really care, it's just part of their jobs to look like they care but that's it. It's not genuine.

Sorry I'm just a really negative person. (I find sunny days depressing for god's sake!)

Re: Fed up and tired

@chick any problem which is worrying your or impacting in some way is big enough to talk about with someone.
The other thing, big problems often tend to snowball from small ones, so sorting out while it's a smaller problem will be much easier then trying once it's snowballed! Smiley Happy

I can understand not wanting to tell people around you. I don't usually confide in people around me either.. But I certainly try not to bottle things up, for me, it's the community here and eheadspace or KHL. I wonder if either of these services could be useful for you?

It's ok to feel a little negative every now and then. It's only when it becomes constant that it becomes a bit of a worry. And when you're not feeling great, positive can feel really hard to achieve. For me I think about the things I've accomplished, I think about what makes me smile. I think about what I've overcome, and how far I've already come in my journey. Because everyone's is unique, and you cannot measure yours against someone elses. Smiley Happy

I hope this helps @chick Let us know if we can help in any particular way Smiley Happy x

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Fed up and tired

Hey @chick , how has your school week been so far?

High school can be pretty rough by itself, without feeling like a stranger  every day. I had a pretty good time at school (few dramas, big group of people to hang out with, a best friend that I still every week even though we graduated five years ago) but even then there were times when I just felt really isolated. Like you, I also had an issue with my speech (not a stutter, I had a lazy tounge meaning I had a lot of trouble pronucing certain sounds and had to go through years and years of speech therapy) and even now as an adult when I get overexcited I can be hard to understand. Like you, I tried to ignore eveything negative and would go out of my way to avoid making situations where I could be patronised (for example, I never spoke up in class to answer a question even if I 100% knew an answer and no one else could get it). However, as I grew older I realised that ignoring things didn't work for me because later I just would internalise eveything and end up feeling really rubbish. Instead, I decided to own it. So what if sometimes I sound strange when I talk? So what if sometimes I have to repeat myself? That's something that makes me, me, even if at times it can be frustrating. It makes me unique. And if people have a problem with how you or I speak ? Then they're the ones with the problem, not us. 

 

On a different tangent, there's nothing wrong with negativity in moderation. Imagine how annoying people would be if they were over-the-top positive all the time! In saying that, Reach Out has a great post about challenging negative thinking that might help you out! A few things that might help you out are joining in on our 'positive of the day' thread and our 'turning negatives into positives' thread. They can both be pretty fun! (:

 

 

Highlighted

Re: Fed up and tired

@chick  I too prefer cold rainy days (sunny days make me nervous because of snakes and where I live)! But that is besides the point.

High school is a difficult and, at times, horrid experience! Between grumpy old teachers, some sh*thead peers and the overly-frequent fresh batch of acne, I thought I was going to become a hateful old soul. It can be very draining

However, I encourage you to think in the long term.  You've already done 4 YEARS (good work!!) and there is a vast and unexplored life beyond school that I really look forward to you experiencing!

Don't become annoyed with yourself for feeling anxious or depressed, it is very common and unfortunately something that people have to deal with.  The good news is it makes you a stronger and more empathic person. 
I'm sorry to hear that some of the girls have a go at you, that must be infuriating, especially when you have to try and contain your frustration! It shows immaturity on their part and determination, strength and maturity on yours.  If I were you, I would sit down and talk to either my friends, parents or teachers about this, as you'll be surprised at how receptive they can be! Further, school's often have a counsellor available, perhaps this is something you could investigate!

Finally, emotional pain is real and don't get upset with yourself thinking that yours shouldn't or can't be as bad as someone else seemingly in a worse situation.  You are just as unique and important as anyone else and deserve the same respect and to be listened to. 

Things get better, just hang in there! You don't know what's around the corner

I hope things pick up and please let us know how it goes

p.s. you are not alone in these experiences