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Feeling broken

I haven't been able to eat or sleep much.. I'm going through another heart break and I was hoping that I wouldn't have too.. I agreed to be friends with him because I thought I was okay with us being just friends as long as he's still in my life somehow. But it's even harder holding in how I really feel and what I really want to say so we can be just that.. all I want to do is tell him how much I love him and how much I want us to try.. I'm having a hard time moving on. I try to show him it doesn't bother me.. but I can't see him with someone else. I know I don't have a choice. But my heart is breaking so much. Because now we barely talk or see each other, and in my head it's like someone else already has his attention.. I thought I didn't have to go through this again.. but here iam for a 3rd time. And im tired of it. I just want the pain to go away. How come the things I want most, be the things that get taken from me so easily? 😢😔

Re: Feeling broken

Hey @Broken_heart, it sounds like a really difficult and painful time for you. Thanks for reaching out and sharing some of your story with us. 

 

Breaks ups can be incredibly painful, as I'm sure many of us can attest! It sounds especially hard since this is your third break up. Try to remember that breaking up with someone doesn't mean you can't have a great and happy relationship with someone else later on! Sometimes it takes a while to find the person or people who's right for us Smiley Happy

What could you do to take care of yourself during this tough time? Is there anything that you enjoy, or people who make you feel happy and safe? 

 

Kids Helpline is a great service that you can call on 1800 55 1800 to talk to about anything. They're really lovely people who'll listen confidentially. It might help to talk about this experience with them if you feel like it Heart

 

Here for you. 

Re: Feeling broken

Hi @Broken_heart and welcome to ReachOut Smiley Happy

 

Thank you for sharing your story with us. I've never been through a break-up myself but I understand how difficult it must feel to have to go through that multiple times. Do you have anyone around you who you can talk to about these feelings? 

Like @DruidChild mentioned, KidsHelpLine can be a great place to go if you need someone to talk to as they are anonymous and offer web or email counselling if talking isn't your thing. 

 

ReachOut also has a great article on coping with break-ups here, maybe it will give you some ideas? What do you think?

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Re: Feeling broken

Heya @Broken_heart

How're you feeling? Were any of the suggestions mentioned here helpful?

Here for you Smiley Happy
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No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish

Re: Feeling broken

No not really 

Re: Feeling broken

Welcome to RO and thank you for having the courage to reach out @Broken_heart.

 

Break ups can really feel like such an overwhelming and painful experience and we can really lose our sense of control and self-worth. Break ups are also one of those things where we can offer awesome advice or support to our friends going through them but when we're going through it ourselves, it can feel like nothing works and nothing helps! It really is a bit of a process that takes time and some self-compassion Heart 

 

What might help though is to try and shift your focus from your ex to yourself. So maybe when you're up for it, use this time to work on yourself (emotionally, mentally and physically) and to schedule in all the things you enjoy.

 

For some more practical help, you might also want to check out RO's "coping with a break up" and the "breakup shakeup" app?

 

Now this may sound silly but personally, I like to create upbeat, feel good playlists; and yeah at first it feels a bit odd listening to it when you don't feel that way but then all of a sudden you kind of find yourself feeling a little lighter and a bit more energised and empowered!

 

I wonder if any of our other members have found some good resources (books, movies, apps, activities) for their "break up toolbox" ? @lokifish @N1ghtW1ng @DruidChild @Bee @ErinsAntics