I'm a bit glad that it's over for now and I won't see her again until next year. But that's sort of the other problem, I don't see her until next year and I don't see my counsellor from school ever again after next week so I won't have any support over the holidays. I know it sounds selfish and you might think I'm mean for thinking this but I feel I really need support over the holidays because my nan passed away a couple of years ago and christmas is always really stressful and upsetting for me. I can't talk to my parents about it because they're just as stressed and upset about it as I am.
I'm not sure what to do, because I really do need support of some sort over the holidays. I know it sounds selfish but it's just the way I am. If it wasn't for the support I have, I would seriously think I would be dead so I'm really glad I have found all these people but I'm losing the most important one..
I can't believe my counsellor is leaving, she didn't tell me, my English teacher did. I burst into tears as soon as I heard it and I haven't been able to calm down since.
Also I know a lot of you have suggested I ring kids helpline, I've called once before and it was a little scary for me actually, I'm just wondering if it's worthwhile to do while on holidays and I have no other support?
Sorry this is such a long post but I really needed to get this off my chest.
Also sorry if there are any spelling mistakes I'll try to fix them if there are any but this is a rushed post because I'm actually supposed to be studying lol.
Re: Headspace appointment
You saw a Headspace pyschologist, well done! That's fantastic. Opening up can be really hard, but having your phobia as well must have been so difficult. I'm really impressed and happy for you, massive effort. And I'm so glad she was lovely!
Needing support is not selfish at all, it's human and it's a brave step to acknowledge that. I'm sorry to hear about your nan. Do you have any other family members tht you might feel comfortable talking to? Maybe cousins or aunts/uncles? It's a tough time for everyone, which you said in your post. Your parents may need some time to deal with this, but do you think you might be able to do it together? When I lost someone close to me, I found that just being with the other people experiencing the same loss was comforting for me. And eventually we were able to remember the good times we had with this person and that really helped me. Do you think you might be able to do that with someone?
It sucks that your counsellor is leaving, it sounds like you got along well with her. Have you been able to speak to her since finding out? She might have some good ideas about coping or maybe be able to suggest another counsellor. Over the holidays, have you thought about the eHeadspace service? https://eheadspace.org.au/ They have online counsellors which can be a little less scary than Kids helpline. And you can always keep posting here on RO too
Well done again for facing a phobia!
Re: Headspace appointment
HI again Pillow, thanks so much for giving us an update on your first appointment. You'll never know how many people you just helped by writing what you did. There are thousands of young people that are part of this community - reading but never posting. And so many of them are in the same boat as you - needing help but finding the idea of going to a clinc and talking to counsellor just so scary. By reading your story and hearing about how your psychologist was really awesome and that she made you feel comfortable &understood that you were nervous - you might have just made a difference in someone's life and they might be on the phone right now getting help for the first time.
Anyway, we had a chat last night on the forums about some of the difficulties of the xmas period - including that a lot of the support services we all rely on close down for a week or two. Have a read - there was lots of solutions we thought of. Including:
- Calling/webchatting with Kids Helpline:Yes, I do think this is a great idea. You can even start by chatting about the weather - they will talk to you about the weather! I've met lots of KHL counsellors and it's their job to talk to you about anything. They are there and will listen 24/7. Also, you could make use of eHeadspace when your regular Headspace counsellor isn't around.
- The forums here are also always here - 24 hours a day. We can't gauruntee that you will always get an immediate response, but sometimes it good to let it out. There is another forum too, specifically about self-harm and how to cope. Check it out here: http://buslist.org/phpBB/
- Plan it out - Think about who in your friends or family you can talk to, and ask them now 'hey do you mind if sometimes i text/call/come over for a chat if I'm feeling overwhelemd?' and follow through - when you are struggling, reach out to them.
Then after all that - remember, that you are strong enough to have made it thius far - and you can continue to do so. I do think that you are really brave and it's a really good saign that you've started opening up to us here. Now you just need to keep going.
Online Community Manager
Re: Headspace appointment
Firstly, I think it's awesome that you persevered with getting help, especially after your negative experiences in the past. It can be tricky to find a psychologist that you trust ( I tried 4 before I found one that worked for me), so it's great that you've found one that you can talk to and it understanding.
In terms of getting help over the summer holidays, whilst you may not be able to acess your Headspace or school counsellor, there are still places or things you could fall back on if you need a distraction or someone to talk to or even just a way to relax.
There's a reachOut factsheet that I think has some useful suggestions (here if you want to have a look: Summer survival kit. It suggests some of the places Sophie mentioned above such as the ReachOut forums, Kids Help Line, having a list of supports (friends/family, etc.) that you can contact. It also gives some relaxation/distraction techniques such as meditation/mindfulness, reading, listening to music, drawing, write your thoughts or some poetry/story, take photos, go for a walk. You might even have other things that you find helps.
It also has links to some other factsheets you might find helpful such as this one on dealing with grief at Christmas.
All the best and take care.
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