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How else does being religious effect your Mental Health

I'm really struggling with a few things at the moment and one of them is how my religion is effecting my Mental Health and way of thinking.

I find it so much harder battling Mental Health (and even just my diagnosis - BorderlinePD) whilst being a devout Christian . . . Theres so many things that Ive done and especially the way my mind thinks that I believe that I would go to hell (so when it comes to wanting to end things, I wanna do it ad go to do it but am so scared that it will just be nothing or worse).

 

The things I've done and the lies constantly being told, I dont believe I'd be forgiven by anyone involved, 

I feel so alone, Im so scared, and every night since I can remember (possibly at 5 or younger) I am scared of death but Im so scared to live.

 

I'm safe and things at the moment as I'm trying really hard to do so good (for some specific reason I cant say incase it gets found out), but wanted to see what other peoples thoughts are on this matter.

 

Re: How else does being religious effect your Mental Health

Hey @CasKat91, that sounds really hard. I was brought up to be Christian, but am not big on it currently. I have however been told that I would go to hell if I suicide. It's normal to be scared of death and our bodies fight against it. And it is also common not to have a sense of purpose with BPD, so I assume that must be where the feelings of not wanting to live come from. I'm sorry I'm not much help, because I'm still trying to understand my diagnosis too. I am though happy to try to keep talking about this. 

Re: How else does being religious effect your Mental Health

Hey @CasKat91 I'm not religious but I used to be - I was christian, then pagan, now agnostic. 

 

I understand what you mean in being afraid that you'll go to hell, or there'll be nothing there. These are very normal things to be feeling. Do you have a youth group or a pastor you could talk to about these fears? 

 

When I was religious, especially when I was Pagan, I found a lot of comfort in it. To my knowledge, a lot of mentally ill people find comfort in religion. Knowing that someone out there is looking out for me, and truly wants the best for me, helped me through my tough times. Often I would pray (or beg) my Goddess to help alleviate the pain, help me be happier, protect me from myself, and while She didn't do that directly, it helped me feel more in control and able to help myself, if that makes sense. It gave me a sense of hope. 

 

I hope this helps. And from my knowledge of Christianity, you will be forgiven. God is forgiving. Jesus is forgiving. It will be okay Heart

Re: How else does being religious effect your Mental Health

@loves netball . . . I never believe someone would go to hell if they suicide as thats someones last fight that was too hard; I just feel that because theres this big lie and I cant stop that (I have tried), that he wont forgive me.
Mind you some days when I get visions of doing heroic stuff if someone did something bad and Id die from it I see myself going to heaven or it not mattering to much Smiley Happy

hope you guys have a good day today Smiley Happy 👍🏻

Re: How else does being religious effect your Mental Health

Hey @CasKat91!

 

Echoing @ivory's question...

 

Have you ever chatted to your pastor or church elders about these feelings?

Re: How else does being religious effect your Mental Health

not yet trying to find someone I can talk to that doesnt know or arent close to my family members

Re: How else does being religious effect your Mental Health

Fair enough @CasKat91 although pastors and priests at least are meant to keep things confidential, and you can ask them if they will, too.  I am also having a bit of a look around for a Christian online or phone counseling service, because they might know a bit more about this! Can you tell me what denomination you are?

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Re: How else does being religious effect your Mental Health

Hey CasKat91

Sorry to hear you're struggling at the moment, it sounds like your feeling quite scared and lonely.

Religion and mental health is a tricky topic, especially because so many people are struggling with their mental health and so many people practice different religions.

I do wonder if theres anyone out there going through the same struggles as you. Have you had the chance to talk to a local psychologist or counsellor? Or maybe thought about approaching your church to see if you can form a youth group for other people in your community who are also feeling overwhelmed or suffering from a mental health disorder.

I think you'd be surprised at how many people are having the same thoughts and worries as you, and maybe all it will take is to reach out Smiley Happy.

In answering your question, I dont belong to any religion and never have. When I was struggling with bullying growing up I didnt have anyone I could turn to, but I remember going to a Christian youth group with a friend from school, and being around other people who were just looking to have fun and hang out really reboosted my self esteem and feeling of belonging. I think religion can be a wonderful thing for your mental health, and I think it can also be a really hard thing if you put pressure on yourself to be a certain way and think a certain way.

Be kind to yourself Heart

Re: How else does being religious effect your Mental Health

Im Salvation Army . . . hehe my church is majoritally the older generation; I think it got worder for my mental health when I had to swap church for a year internship and got back to my original church and was excluded; for a few of them I just ended up helping clean or prepare stuff (which was good but lonesome).