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I'm just feeling anxious and alone

Hey everyone,

 

Hope you're doing well. But, I just wanted to talk about how I've been feeling these past few days to see if anyone can help me. So I've been feeling okay, but just recently. I've just been feeling really anxious and alone. I've just been coming home from school feeling like there's nothing there for me to do. I become bored, and that turns into me feeling anxious, that turns into me looking for a reason as to why I'm feeling anxious and in turn starts to flare up my negative thoughts and intrusive thoughts. I don't really have anyone to talk to in my real life about this apart from my sibling, but they're at work so I don't really want to disturb them. I know that it's okay to feel not okay, but it's really tough to keep remembering that when you're in the process of not feeling okay. I've been journaling about the intrusive thoughts but at some point, it's just tough to even believe what I've told myself time and time again. I know that I can get through this at some point, but right now. It just feels like this is going to last for a long time. All my assessments are finished, but my friend still has quite a lot to go through in his schooling. So I can't talk to him either it's just hard to get through this alone and I just want someone to talk to here. 

Thank you, Smiley Happy

Re: I'm just feeling anxious and alone

Heyy @ApplesRoses , I'm sorry you've been feeling anxious and alone just recently, but please know that it's so strong of you to be sharing your problems and be seeking help. Smiley Happy Do you know why you start feeling anxious when you become bored? When I feel anxious I like to distract myself from my thoughts by playing video games or playing the piano. Is there anything that you can do to help relieve your anxiety or avoid your intrusive thoughts? I remember in a previous post you wrote some awesome strategies to reduce intrusive thoughts such as the STOPP strategy and 'you are your own best friend' strategy. Have these helped you out this time? Additionally, if your anxiety and intrusive thoughts keep persisting for a long time, you may want to seek a professional/counsellor for more specialised help. Some resources you could use are the kids helpline and eheadspace!

 

It's good to see that you know that it's okay to feel not fine, and that you're trying to journal your intrusive thoughts, even though it can be tough at times! Smiley Happy From what you've posted and commented in this forum in addition to your positive attitude, I know that you'll be able to get through this! We're all here to talk to you so feel free to voice out anything you're feeling!

 

I hope you do start feeling better soon! <3 Sending you good vibes!

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Re: I'm just feeling anxious and alone

@ApplesRoses  I'm so sorry about how you've been feeling recently. Smiley Sad I think it's great that you've tried some things to help with your intrusive thoughts. I'm here if you need someone to talk to. Heart

How are you doing now? I hope you're feeling better. Heart

Re: I'm just feeling anxious and alone

Hey @WheresMySquishy @drpenguin @MB95 

I've mentioned @MB95 because they asked a question in another thread I've made a while back now. And, I feel as if my answer here will answer the question. 

Anyways, I just wanted to start off by saying that I'm sorry for not replying to any of y'all. I really wanted to come back and talk to y'all. But I've just been going through a really rough patch with my mental health right now. Like, really bad. I was actually about to write a response to the questions that @MB95 asked in another thread about my mental health. But on that day, my intrusive thoughts and my negative thoughts became more prevalent. Different thoughts and experiences have been resurfacing. After I thought that I've gone through them. It's just really difficult right now, as I've just been wanting to talk to a professional but I can never seem to find the right time, or I just get way too scared that they'll never understand. I've just been doing meh to be honest, and I've just been going through life as best as I can. I'm just thankful that assessment season is over right now and I'm thankful that I have a friend that I can confide in right now. Right now, I've loosely planned that someday in the holiday I'll be going to a headspace centre for an appointment with someone. 

Thank you for your support in this time of my life. It really means a lot to have someone having my back. <3 

Re: I'm just feeling anxious and alone

I'm so sorry that things have been really rough for you right now @ApplesRoses. The negative thoughts sound really overwhelming and stressful. Smiley Sad I'm glad that you have a friend you can trust and confide in though. It must also help that the assessment season is over. I think going to a headspace centre is a good idea too. Heart

Is there anything else that helps when you have the intrusive thoughts? Sometimes, I like to write down my unhelpful thoughts (this could also help if you're planning on seeing a professional), or try to look at the situation more objectively.
We have a helpful article here which has some strategies for tackling negative thoughts, though I'm not sure if it applies to the ones you have. I personally find that different strategies work for different kinds of thoughts.

Re: I'm just feeling anxious and alone

Hey @WheresMySquishy 

I've been writing down the thoughts on my phone, so I could have it close by if I do have the thoughts again. I mainly write down what I would say to my friend if they had similar thoughts or a similar thought process or experiences. For the majority of the time they've been really helpful in processing these thoughts and to diffusing them. Sad thing is, is that right now. Sometimes it takes forever for my mind to just be on the same page as my own processing of the thoughts. Like I would've already written down the diffusion to a negative/intrusive thought yet for the next few days I would need to keep hammering that down to my mind before I can get back to my own life. It's helpful but by the time I would've finished breaking down the thought another thing just comes along to just break me down. 

Right now, I've just broken down a thought and I've just been doing some self-care activities to make sure that I'm going to be alright before heading off to bed. I'm hoping to try and get an appointment before Christmas. But it's great to know that I have lots of peoples' support when it comes to me taking care of myself. It's helping me feel less worried about accessing the headspace service. Smiley Happy

Also, this is off-topic but I just wanted to ask (This is mainly for @WheresMySquishy) but how are you finding Sword & Shield? Personally, I love it. It's been the only constant throughout this and it's been good to have as a pass-time. I'm not really a big fan of the post-game though. Not going to say anything else unless you've played the whole game. 

Re: I'm just feeling anxious and alone

@ApplesRoses  I write down my thoughts on my phone too. I think those are some great strategies! Smiley Happy I hope that you can get an appointment and that headspace can help you.

I haven't been able to play much of Sword so far because I've been really busy, but I like what I've seen so far. I've given the Switch to my sister so that she can play Shield and try to catch up to where I am.
I really like the Wild Area. I've watched some of the post-game on YouTube and I don't like it either. It just seems really short and not very exciting, especially compared to the last generation. Hopefully, they can introduce more content as a download.
I've played all the Pokemon generations and my favourites are Generations 2 and 3, while my least favourite has to be the Black and White era. But so far, I like this generation better than those games.

Re: I'm just feeling anxious and alone

Hii @ApplesRoses , sorry for also not replying too Smiley Surprised, I just got back home from a holiday trip with my family so I haven't been on the forums for the past 2 weeks. I'm really sorry that you've gone through difficult times with your mental health, but we're glad you've checked in with us and shared how you've been! Smiley Very Happy It's also great to read that you've been doing self-care activities to make sure that you're okay before bed! So how have you been feeling recently? Have you managed to make an appointment with someone at a headspace centre?

I've also been playing pokemon shield for the past month and i quite enjoy it! I'm a little sad that the game is so short and linear, but I really like all the new pokemon and galarian forms in this generation! I'm really excited for how the next new games are going to be like for the pokemon series since it's been a relatively new experience for gamefreak to be working on pokemon in a home console!

I hope you have a wonderful holiday in these coming weeks!

Re: I'm just feeling anxious and alone

Hi @ApplesRoses 

 

Apologies for not replying sooner, I vaguely remember seeing the tag but wasn't in the greatest headspace so decided to wait till later. Just flicking back through messages and I've realised I never replied so I'm really sorry about that!!! 

 

I just want to check in and see how you're doing now? ❤

 

Negative/intrusive thoughts are never a fun time. I have them daily so can totally relate. I think it's absolutely amazing that you're taking note of them though and starting to fight back to them with what you'd say to a friend. I am also really happy to hear you have a wonderful friend that you feel safe confiding in - they are worth their weight in gold so never be afraid to turn to them!! 

 

Just wanted to check in and see where you're at with getting an appointment booked? If I can give you any advice at all it's that there is never going to be a right time to get help. And I really do hope you take this on board. I waited 10yrs to speak up and seek the help I've finally been getting this year and honestly, I just wish I had spoken up all those years ago!! But like you, I was terrified no one would understand. I was so scared so I just let myself suffer in silence and I feel like I wasted 10yrs of my life. It's only now that I am seeing my psych that I'm starting to acknowledge and deal with things. She is teaching me to cope with certain struggles and I feel like finally I am starting to wake up from being dead for so long. So please, as scary as it is, please don't wait for the right time like I did!!!! If it would help, maybe get your friend to call and make the appointment for you? They could even go with you for support? They don't have to sit in on the session but they could just wait outside till you're done? Sometimes it just helps with the scariness of it all.. 

 

Anyway, sorry again for not getting back to you! Please do update me on where you're at because I'd love to know. And I hope you have a great christmas and are kind to yourself during this period ❤❤

Re: I'm just feeling anxious and alone

Hey Everyone,

@WheresMySquishy @MB95 @drpenguin 

Thank you all for the messages you've left, they've been helpful for my mental health. I've been feeling a smidge better since the last time I left a message on the forums. Like, I feel less worried-ish, like my intrusive thoughts/negative thoughts are still really prevalent and they've been a pest daily. But right now, I've already let my friend, sibling and their partner know that I've been wanting to access the headspace service. And they're supportive of it, the only thing is. Is that since it's the holiday season. It's quite difficult to plan out when, cause I definitely don't want to go in alone. But everyone's quite busy with holiday stuff. So I'm holding on, but I know that the situation won't get any better unless I reach out for it myself. 

I've also been having some worries about going to headspace. Like, what if they won't understand, what if really I am the things my mind tells me, what if the person I'm talking 

to also thinks I am the things my mind tells me. It's just annoying that my intrusive/negative thoughts get in the way of my life so much, so I really do think going to headspace would be the best thing for myself. For now, talking to y'all is really doing some good for me. As it just allows me to just breathe out for a little bit with people who have my best interests in mind. 

I hope to speak with y'all soon and also I hope y'all have a great holiday season. All of you who've been on the forums have just been lovely to speak to in the last year and it's amazing to have met so many wonderful people like you all. You really deserve the whole world for your work on the forums! Smiley Happy