I go to uni in Canberra and there's not much in the way of bulk-billing doctors round here.
So I went to one of the few GP's that does bulk bill to get a MHCP (shit's been going on for a long time, but I never did anything about it before). And so that was fine. It's now 2 weeks later and I finally called up to book an appointment with the psychologist (there's one who works at the same place as the GP who bulk bills) and they said that the next appointment isn't until the end of April and I don't know what to do.
Even though I've had depression and/or anxiety (although I never went to the doctor for it) for years, things got really bad really fast this year and I don't know how I'm going to cope with waiting 4 weeks before I can even see a psych and if I have to wait until then to book another appointment then it'll probably be another month until I have a second appointment.
And I just don't know how I'm supposed to go another 4 weeks without killing myself and/or ruining the few friendships I've managed to make and destroying everything good in my life.
I can't really afford to go to a psych that doesn't bulk bill at the moment because I haven't gotten a job here yet and there aren't many psych's that do bulk bill so I doubt I'd be able to find one that'll have a shorter wait time.
And I've been trying to get a job but I get such bad anxiety about it and sometimes it seems fine but then other times I panic a lot and I can't even think about having to go to a job interview because I can't even remember how to pretend to smile. I think I'm too fucked up to just call a helpline or whatever though. I got 40/22/20 for the DASS test thing and apparently that's bad and I've talked to kids helpline before and they don't really help
inb4 my account gets deleted because I'm using an overseas VPN
First I want to welcome you to the forum, it's really brave thing to ask for help, so I am proud of you for taking such a step.
The situation that you've just described sounds really difficult and I could imagine how stressful it would feel to have to wait a month to see your new therapist, after making a lot of effort to see someone after all this time.
There are luckily a few options you might have to see someone in under a month's time. First of all there are a bunch of face to face services that you can go to see for therapy. Your uni should have a mental health service, where you can get free counselling sessions. You can also go to a headspace centre, as they also provide free or low-cost face therapy, or talk to your GP about accessing the Adult Community Mental Health Teams (this is an ACT service, which you can find out more here). Headsapce also has online counselling that you can access any day, 9am - 1am.
As for being "too fucked up" to call a helpline, you don't really have to worry about that. There are a bunch of helplines that engage with people at varying levels of intensity. I strongly recommend calling LifeLine or Suicide Call Back Service, if you are in distress or feeling suicidal, as they are best equipped to handle that sort of situation. You can also always call 000, as they can get you to emergency mental health care ASAP.
Thanks for letting us know that you're from Australia, and that you're just using a VPN!