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Just need someone to talk to and someone to listen.

So, The other day I was watching this show called "Obese and pregnant" and while I was watching it I started wondering if that was going to happen to me when I'm older, and then I also started thinking about other things like how I know I have people to talk to but I don't feel like I can talk to them though, I'm only 13 and I'm pretty sure I'm a hundred and something kilos. I don't want to diet, I think those are stupid, but my mum and I have tried Light and Easy, the thing is it would work if I didn't go eating other food in the house, I can't help it I have restrained myself from doing it a few times, I knew I had a problem when I noticed today when I even thought about getting something that was still good that I had thrown away for reason from the garbage (I didn't go get it I told myself not to). I know some people may judge me, go ahead everyone can't sympathize with everyone I just.... I have people to talk to but I just don't feel like I can my mum is in the same situation with being over weight, she was once even just 10 kilos heaver than me, and that just made me feel really bad. I posted this just so I could get it all off my chest and if anyone either has some advice or in the same situation I would love to hear it, I feel like I'm the only one, and to be fairly honest I feel ashamed for being the way I am.

Re: Just need someone to talk to and someone to listen.

Hey Brighteyed 

 

Welcome to the forums Smiley Happy you are so brave for coming on here and sharing your story with us and I understand what you are going through.

 

You are only 13 and you are still very young. I have 2 sisters, one of my sisters who is 14, she has always been fit and eats healthy but sometimes you cant help your genes. She lost a dress size and that was because of baby weight, and my other sister is also 13 and she is a size 18, has always been big but she is young and that weight might just be baby weight. I myself am not tiny, i have great curves Smiley Very Happy I try to eat healthy and exercise and I dont lose that much weight and I think its because my whole family, extended family is big and so I think its just genetics. 

 

If you are worried about your weight and you want to do something about it, going to see a doctor or GP might help because they might guide u in the right direction. I went to a doctor who really helped me eat healthy and figure out what works for me and what doesnt and I have so much energy now and even though I dont lose much weight, I feel great about myself and thats important. 

 

It takes a lot of self confidence, self awareness, and positive self image for you to make a positive change for your life and to make change in your health. I linked some factsheets for you to read so if you want to know more, you can read up on it Smiley Happy 

 

Take care of yourself and remember you are not going through this alone. 

 

 

_________________________________________________
**Believe in the power of you because you are your own hero**

Re: Just need someone to talk to and someone to listen.

Thank you for the reply, I just really wanted to tell someone how I felt.

I have recently created a daily planner for myself like you normally would get up have breakfast, exercise to hopefully get me somewhere better then where I am now. It's nice to know I'm not alone now Smiley Happy

Re: Just need someone to talk to and someone to listen.


Hey, you want to hear a story?

I used to weigh more then a hundred kilos, I am pretty I was over that when I was 13-14. For years I didn't do anything about it, I went through most of high school weighing that and getting heavier, I did, however manage to steady it out for the last few years keep my weight steady. For the past 5 or so months I have been taking action and I've lost weight. (I'd say the numbers but it's against the community guidelines and for a good reason).

You're not alone in your endivous.

 

Edit: I feel do feel uncomfortable posting this back in but I hope you get something out of it and that's the only reason I'm putting it back

Re: Just need someone to talk to and someone to listen.

That is amazing BrightEyed. I'm glad that you felt heard.

 

Tempus has a great story there and it's so inspirational and you can do it you just need DRIVE to change your life and I think you have it.

 

The planner is a great idea and stay positive with it sometimes its hard and you lose motivation but that's normal you just need to be persistent and if you feel like you need motivation or positivity come on the forums, we are here for you and you could also check out these forum convos Three Positives, What are you proud of and Reflecting on the positive 

 

Hope to see you around. Smiley Happy 

 

Take care 

 

 

_________________________________________________
**Believe in the power of you because you are your own hero**

Re: Just need someone to talk to and someone to listen.


@Tempus wrote:

 (I really want to say the numbers but it's been edited out in a previous thread -.-. Screw it, if it is indeed against the community guidelines, remove it. I have read the guidelines and I don't believe it's personal information because it's not really that personal).


Hey everyone!

 

The community guidelines are quite clear about not stating specific weights. It's not about it being personal information, it's to do with the standards that people set for themselves and each other. Losing or gaining a certain amount of weight may be considered unhealthy or unreasonable for one person but perfectly acceptable for another.

 

You should definitely be very proud of any healthy weight changes you've achieved if they were part of the goals you've established for your own physical and mental wellbeing, but those numbers are specific to you and you alone and we don't want someone else setting their own goals based on the physical health of someone else as that may not be healthy for them.

 

We really appreciate your understanding. Smiley Happy

Re: Just need someone to talk to and someone to listen.

Okay, thanks for the response, I'll remove the post as it pointless now.

Re: Just need someone to talk to and someone to listen.


@Tempus wrote:
Okay, thanks for the response, I'll remove the post as it pointless now.

It really wasn't pointless at all; it was a valuable contribution. What you achieved was still something to be proud of and that was clear in your post; which ruenhonx agreed with. If you want to leave it out, I understand, but I'd love to see you restore it. Smiley Happy

Re: Just need someone to talk to and someone to listen.

Okay then, I put it back it back, read the edit for why.

Re: Just need someone to talk to and someone to listen.

Hey BrightEyed, welcome to Reach Out!

 

I can identify with your story, when I hit puberty I filled out pretty quickly and I've always been a big girl. Part of it is genes (I come from a heavyset Italian family) and part of it is hormonal (I have PCOS) but the rest was that I didn't exercise and overate. It's really hard to be a big girl in today's society. We have messages coming at us from every angle telling us we aren't thin enough, aren't pretty enough and aren't worthy enough. If you find a rare instance of a bigger body-type on TV it's usually the butt of a joke or a cautionary tale. It's not fair and it's not based in reality. Fat people do exist, we do have feelings and how we look on the outside is not indicative or our health, our personality or our value.

 

Something I've really been embracing lately is the concept of Health At Every Size. Ruenhoex posted a great link on body image that fits in well with the idea of HAES. Especially this paragraph:


Instead of spending heaps of time thinking about food, weighing food, fantasising about food, Just eat what makes you feel healthy and gives you plenty of energy to achieve what you want with your life. Try to eat healthy and in moderation. Focus on how different foods make you feel – you’ll start noticing which one make you feel tired, bloated, lethargic, and which ones make you feel energetic and awake. Don’t get caught up in fad diets which inevitably end up backfiring, and result in you putting on more weight than you started with.

 

If you are eating for health and finding a way to move your body that feels good, then regardless of your weight, size or shape you can embrace your body as a healthy one. I'm really enjoying finding a form of movement or exercise that suits me, so fr I'm loving swimming, pump classes and hiking. Plus I'm experimenting with different recipes and foods to try new things and see what makes me feel good. I've lost some weight in the process but the pay off fo me is feeling my body get stronger and healthier. Focusing on my health rather than the scale makes accepting and loving myself much easier.