I'm currently sitting awake in bed at 2:40am, I can't sleep. I keep thinking of all the shitty things I have done in the past, feeling anxious and stressed about what I'm going to do with life and on the weekend. Trying to push thoughts of horrible things that could be happening right now. Like is my boyfriend cheating on me, is he secretly talking to other people behind my back, are my friends even my friends. Worried that if I keep thinking things like this I'm going to lose my only two friends. Reliving the nights we go out with friends and I get so angry because he spoke to another woman. Is that woman better then me, is he going to break up with me. Being so happy one second and then being so angry the next because I saw a comment on his Facebook. Not being able to talk to my friends because they all tell me I'm being over dramatic or I'm taking things the wrong way. I'm so tired of feeling like I'm crazy or "psycho" just because other people don't agree with the way that I think. I've been on google trying to find a gp to get a referral to talk to somebody about this but it's impossible this time of night and I can't sleep with my head going crazy.
I'm sorry to hear that things have been difficult for you lately, it sounds like there is a lot going on. Have you ever spoken to your boyfriend about these feelings? Relationships can be difficult at times, especially when it feels like your partner is doing things behind you back but sometimes having a conversation with them can help ease those negative thoughts, what do you think?
It is wonderful to see you reaching out both here and looking for a GP online. Seeking help can be hard to do, and confusing at times, there are lots of places that you can go to find support. One of our mods made a fantastic guide over here on seeking face to face support. There are also online places such as KidsHelpLine and EHeadspace that offer over the phone, email or webchat services.
Now that it's daytime, have you had anymore luck in your search?
Hi @Mightbegoingmental and welcome to RO It sounds like there are a lot of things on your mind at the moment, how did the search for the GP go? @Jay-ROmentioned a lot of great resources in the meantime which can be really helpful when you want someone to talk about what you're going through. Have you sought professional help before? Would speaking to a psychologist be a viable option for you? I really hope that things will get better for you Please keep us updated
I am sorry to hear you had a tough time last night but I hope you did manage to get some rest. Are you feeling any better now?
Its great you have been researching GP's and I would highly recommend speaking to someone, the resources @Jay-RO recommended are a good starting point.
Sometimes when I am struggling with problems involving my partner I write them down and then sit with them for a few days before speaking with him about them. I find this helps clear my mind and relieve anxiety. Maybe you could try this if you think it could work for you also?
Also, listening to music or a meditation app when I cant sleep I find really helpful, Quietmind and headspace are great