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Re: OCD is a b*tch

@indieinsanus I'm sorry to hear how difficult things have been for you, your story sounds incredibly reminiscent of my own. I kept it to myself for a very long time too, and it is only this year after 2 years of treatment that I've started divulging the details of my obsessions to my family members. At first, there was such a sense of shame and a feeling that they couldn't possibly understand the crazy things going through my head, but somehow they said it made MORE sense once I told them all the strange and unusual things I had been thinking.

 

I'm glad seeking help has made things a little lighter for you, I still don't know how I made it through those dark times where I didn't have a psychologist and I kept my family out of the loop too. I simply could not last that way now. 

 

It sounds like you've got some really good strategies working for you right now. It has been so amazing to talk to someone else who can empathise with my experience. It's not that others can't, but I always question how well they can really see my perspective when they've never experienced it themselves. It is so nice to finally hear someone say 'I get it' and know that they really do. 

 

On my bad days, I try and do all the things that my head tells me I can't. Most of the time, that is going to work or university. It always feels like such an effort to make it out the door on those days, but I always feel better when I am surrounded by people. During high school, exercise always used to help me too, but over the past few years that has fallen out of my routine. Once I get back to a more manageable level of OCD symptoms, I'd love to get back into it. 

Re: OCD is a b*tch

@queenP it sounds like your really strong, Im happy your more comfortable being open with your loved ones. Im going to start trying to do some excersize even though i despise physical activity ( besides dancing). Its comforting to talk to someone who understands it and isnt a therapist, just another person who genuinely understands the struggle.

Re: OCD is a b*tch

@indieinsanus Do you do much dancing? I used to try running because apparently it's 'good for you' but these days I'd much rather do exercise I like, so I'm getting back into the pool and swimming as often as I can. 

 

If you don't mind me asking, how long have you had OCD for? (or how long have you known it was OCD for?)

Re: OCD is a b*tch

@queenP i use to dance for a while when i was younger, but as i grew i just kind of grew out of liking the whole dance studio stuff, but i still like dancing by myself, usually hip hop and contemporary styles. tbh, i think i have experienced spikes of ocd when i was really young, like the first i recall was probably when i was like 8 or maybe younger, that obsession went on and off for a while, then it came back with a different theme when i was a little older, i didnt actually get told what i was experiencing was OCD up until about a couple months ago. My main problem is with general anxiety and health anxiety but i get spikes of OCD too. Also there isnt much mental health support where i live, so this whole process of getting help has been pretty drawn out.

Re: OCD is a b*tch

@indieinsanus  @queenP - You two are awesome (of course everyone else with or without OCD out there). I've been struggling pretty badly with my OCD recently, and I've recently come to realise it has effected more in my life than I previously thought (e.g. I feel like I have to follow a ritual in order to get perfect marks at school, which is nearly impossible). It's hurt so any spheres of my life. 

I've been feeling really isolated for a while (most you hear of OCD is when people say they're "so OCD" because they like to clean and it can be kinda alienating) but just within the last week I've connected with so many others with OCD and it's been fantastic feeling I'm not alone. Smiley Very Happy 

Re: OCD is a b*tch

@Hozzles Hey, thanks so much, it sucks to hear youve been struggling with ocd, ocd absolutely sucks. Like it sucks so much. But its good to know your not alone, and trust me your not. Im not sure exactly what your experience with OCD has been, but i know its a cruel creature and its awfully convincing, so i hope you have been coping okay. And im also not sure what year of school your in, but im currently in yr 12 and i know its super stressful even by itself, let alone with the added pressure of OCD. 

hope your doing alright at the moment, stay strong.

Re: OCD is a b*tch

@Hozzles it's great to hear that you're feeling less isolated! I don't know about you, but I don't personally know any other people in my day to day life that have OCD, so it has been great to connect with everyone on this thread and know that they understand from first-hand experience what it is like. 

 

If you don't mind me asking, what are some strategies you use when your OCD is getting on top of you? 

Re: OCD is a b*tch

Hey everyone, thank you so much for sharing your experiences and struggles. Heart It's helping me to feel so much less alone. Even now that I'm in intensive therapy for other stuff, nobody's ever really focused on my OCD symptoms and I've kind of had to muddle through alone. Because they're not as bad as other symptoms that I have and they probably don't meet the threshold for a proper diagnosis anymore (plus because the content of my obsessions is so disturbing), I don't really talk about them. I wasn't sure whether to post in this thread. I hope it's okay. 

 

My OCD probably started when I was 8 and that first bout lasted until I was 12, mostly obsessions-compulsions complicated by what I now realise is probably synesthesia. Then from 14 or so they started again and I started having painful intrusive thoughts on their own which got worse and more distressing as I got older. It got to the point that I quit my job because it triggered such awful thoughts. Now I don't have as many compulsions, but I still get frequent intrusive thoughts and I also tend to have obsessive anxious thinking where I fixate on one thing and can't stop thinking about it over and over and over again until I'm in tears. 

 

@queenP the thing that helps me most is trying to find things that bring me some calm and peace and help me forget to be scared for a while. I like sitting outside and seeing nature go by, feeling the wind and looking at clouds. Heart

Re: OCD is a b*tch

Hey @DruidChild, you are more than welcome to post here and thank you for sharing that with us. It is amazing to hear that you have some strategies to deal with these compulsions. From what you've said, you mostly focus on other concerns as opposed to your OCD symptoms. Is that correct? It can be difficult to prioritise what to focus on when you have a lot of other things going on. Do you think you are focusing on what is most important to you? Heart

Re: OCD is a b*tch

Hey everyone! I just wanted to share that I have recently finished Turtles All the Way Down by John Green, and it represents what it is like to have OCD so clearly. The protagonist struggles through her daily life while trying to cope with intrusive thoughts, and none of her actions seem to fall into the normal stereotypes associated with OCD. I've passed it on to my family and friends as I think it could be a great tool for educating them on what it actually feels like in my mind sometimes. I would highly recommend checking it out if you guys like to read.