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Re: TW- what’s holding me back from suicide?

This sounds like a pretty heavy burder to bear @Bananatime04. Dealing with the death of someone we know or care about can be really tough, and I imagine this is terrifying for you. 

 

How was lunch with your pop? Smiley Happy Are you pretty close with him? I'm sorry to hear he has to go to hospital. I hope everything is OK.

 

Later on I am meeting a friend for dinner, but aside from that I'm not doing much. How about you?

Re: TW- what’s holding me back from suicide?

Aww thank you so much @queenP 😊
Telling my step mum was easy because I was in bed actually writing a post on here and she came in and sat on my bed next to me and asked what was up with me because she knew I’d been sad all day. She gave some really good advice and even offered to drive to his house just so I could give him a hug or tell him I’m here for him.. she also said he could come over if he wanted to but I had to go for lunch. It was really nice to know someone cared tho. Even though he lives an hour away from my dads house she was still willing to go that far. I told her that he self harmed and sent photos to me and she gave me some things to say to him because my step sister used to do the same thing so she knows what to say to people that self harm.
I know I can’t control what he does and I’m not responsible for his actions but I know that by me breaking up with him, he will not be safe because he’s told me.. I know that so if I do leave him it will be partly my fault because I would see it coming. I’m just gonna choose the safer option 😕
Thanks for sharing what your dad said Xx

Re: TW- what’s holding me back from suicide?

@JanaG It is terrifying! And to know that if he does do it, I would have a part in it.. that would absolutely ruin me even more so I’d rather stay until he’s on top of his mental health.

I’m really close to my pop! I love him so much and I always miss him.. we moved 2 hours away from him at the start of the year and he used to live like 2 houses from us. Lunch was good.
I’m not really doing much else.. just spending time with my pop Smiley Happy

Re: TW- what’s holding me back from suicide?

I understand that you want to stay until he is more supported. Smiley Happy 

I just want to also remind you that you are not responsible if he does decide to hurt himself. You are doing the best you can.

 

Wow, it sounds like you guys are really close. That's lovely!  Hope you're making the most of the time you have with him Smiley Happy

 

 

 

Re: TW- what’s holding me back from suicide?

Thanks @JanaG Smiley Happy
I wish I could have more time with him but every time he leaves I’m scared it will be the last time because he has sleep apnea, heart problems, a pace maker and has had lots of strokes and an aneurysm.. Smiley Sad he’s also so lonely now. He lives by himself and he’s gone from seeing us everyday to being lucky to see us once a month.. before today I hadn’t seen him for months

Re: TW- what’s holding me back from suicide?

It can be really tough watching our grandparents get older huh @Bananatime04? :/

It must be difficult to see him as much as you want to when you live so far away. Do you at least get to call him?

Re: TW- what’s holding me back from suicide?

@JanaG Yea it is pretty hard Smiley Sad
Mums trying to find a house close to us to buy but we need a big shed because pops got a lot of ‘man stuff’ and an old fashion car.. I say he moves in with us and Airbnb his house like we have with our other house 🤷‍♀️
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Re: TW- what’s holding me back from suicide?

Well I hope your mum sorts something out quickly so you get to see him more @Bananatime04 Smiley Happy

Re: TW- what’s holding me back from suicide?

I just hope he lives a bit longer 😭

Re: TW- what’s holding me back from suicide?

Hey @Bananatime04 

 

Just catching up on posts from over the weekend. I hope you continued to spend good quality time with your pop Heart 

 

I also hope you're feeling okay in regards to your boyfriend. I'm happy to hear that your step mum was able to talk you through responding to the pictures.