Stuck, What to do?

[Tinkmatter]

I cant keep living like this, day after day, week after week, month after month. Living with people that always put me down or make me upset. im just trying becoming an individual. 

There are days where im blamed for everything and anything but i had no part of. Im just becoming an adult and nothing i do is good enough. An example of this happened to me, I ended up changing jobs and didn't say anything, apparently i brought shame and im inconsiderate to my family for supposedly going behind their backs, i was being treated unfairly and had enough so i did the right thing. And only up telling them 4 months later.

I get yelled at because my partner isnt approved by certain people. I cant even go out with friends because i get messages asking where i am and where going. So i just tend to stay home because it casues les fighting.  

Any advice???

[Taylor-RO]

Hey @Tinkmatter, that sounds like a really rough way to live. I am sorry to hear that your parents are causing a lot of distress for you. From what you have said, it sounds like you are doing all you can to please your parents. It seems like you are really concerned about how they feel but their expectations put a lot of pressure on you.

All of this is a lot to deal with, so how do you look after yourself when all of this gets to you? Have you spoken to anyone about this weight on your shoulders?

[LeoTheLion]

Hi there @Tinkmatter

Reading that was stressful so I can't even begin to imagine how stressful that must be on you as well as frustrating. No offence but your family sounds extremely inconsiderate. Like it's your life, your job, I don't how they have any right to put you down for it.

Have you ever thought about moving out (I assume yes), is it a possibility to move out? Like would you have enough money from your job, maybe get some government assistance etc. I think moving out and living with room mates or whatever you choose could be helpful. Obviously it's very hard living by yourself but if you can manage then it's worth it. 

[missep]

Hi @Tinkmatter,
I'm sorry to hear that you are going through that. Like @LeoTheLion has said, it sounds really stressful.
How have you been feeling recently?
@Taylor-RO brought up a really good point. How do you take care of yourself? Do you have a self-care plan or have spoken to a professional when things get really tough?
Please keep us updated, we're here for you

[letitgo]

Hey @Tinkmatter, thanks for posting on RO - we're here to support you as much as we can. That sounds like a really exhausting way to live, and I'm so sorry to hear that you have to go through that.

Well done for recognising that you were being treated unfairly and changing jobs, even though your family wasn't understanding, it was a very brave thing for you to do.

Do you have any extended family that you could talk to about this - like an aunt, or a cousin?

Like the others, I'm concerned about how you're looking after yourself throughout all this, and I'm wondering what some activities that you enjoy, or that could take your mind off things?

Hope to hear from you soon!