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TW: Drug addiction

Hi, I’m reaching out for any help at all with a newly founded problem I’m struggling with increasingly worse each day for drugs 

 

I’m not going to go into history but I recently was given caps that I was told were Molly .... turns out I found out after a few days it was most likely shard.

I have never been a big drug taker, maybe a cap every here and there if given

 

 

however after this I experienced weird things going on.

my mates were talking shit about me, yet everyone was saying they didn’t hear it ?

i would try catch it out and no one could make sense of it.

i couldn’t sleep for 3 days straight, an I kept asking everyone the day after if I had done something wrong or if we were okay.

 

Its been a while now and I’m still suffering from anxious thoughts, and hearing people talking about me.

i caused a fight at work over something I swore I heard yet apparently wasn’t said.

i can’t walk through shops and face people who a few months back I’d hang for hours with. I’d seize up

 

 

my sleeping pattern is 2 days ful awake and then 1 night 4 hours sleep

 

always feeling like people look at my lips and I can’t look people in the eye when talking to me

feel like every one thinks I’ve done something 

 

I need to know how to get help as it’s starting to take control of my life and I can’t help it 

 

 

Re: TW: Drug addiction

Hey there @KiriTanah first up well done on reaching out. It takes a lot of strength and you're right it's really important you seek some support. We can't give any medical advice on RO however I can link you into a few services that'll help.

 

There's drug counselling online  here as well as FDS Aus's support line here. Both these services are 24/7. KHL are a great service too, they work with people up to 25 years of age. You can chat to them on 1800 55 1800. 

 

Have you sought any support from a GP yet? Are you in a safe space tonight? Heart

Re: TW: Drug addiction

I’m in a safe space tonight, I try and lock myself my room as I’m fine when I hang with 1 person but 2 makes sooo paranoid and it starts to cause problems every quick for me .

They begin to tell me to Im a bad person and sometimes need to self-harm.

i fight them with everything until they stop but I’m getting tired of always fighting it

 

 

Im scared to go to a GP as I don’t know how or what to say

plus I’ll lose my job and I’ve always been strong enough to fight this stuff.

 

 

 

Thank you for helping me 

 

 

Re: TW: Drug addiction

Hey @KiriTanah I hear what you're saying. Having too many people is a real trigger by the sounds of it. Your levels of self-awareness are awesome. Just so you know, the counselling services I provided you have a duty of care to keep everything confidential unless you are at imminent risk of hurting yourself or others. You can talk about your drug use with them and they can give you some really good referrals whilst keeping it confidential.

 

You mentioned the self-harm, are you able to stay safe from that tonight? Also I had to edit out the method of sh due to community guidelines. Heart

@Bee @mrmusic @N1ghtW1ng what do you reckon?

Re: TW: Drug addiction

Yeah I become a stranger , it’s like I’m consciously there but not controlling my movements.

I know when it’s happening an I’ve figuired our ways to isolate myself so I limit the amount of things that could work me up.

 

But as we all know, you can’t hide forever, so I’ll go 2 days of heavy anxiety, paranoia voices and not eating or sleeping.

i force myself to eat in front of others otherwise I feel they will think something is wrong.

 

and then I’ll be good for as long as a day or sometimes a way person says something or a random word like - drugs or illegal or shame etc like single words or phrases will turn me really quick before I’ve had the chance to prepare for the next.

 

i keep a journal of all my episodes, what triggers it an what how long for

and what I was feeling.

 

When I’m in an episode The days flash by and I remember nothing. 

 

 

Im a young father and have a wife who we have just started to work on things after a massive broken 6 months and the truth has come out about the betrayal and I’m trying to leave dealing with it until I fix this issue as I won’t be ablle to reconnect in this stage

 

I’m very good with understanding what’s wrong even when I don’t like to admit it

 

so at this stage I’m very very safe tonight and think I’ve succeeded in beating it tonight until I have to leave the house and go to sork

 

 but what is the best thing to do if it did become to much so I’m prepeared for future reference

Re: TW: Drug addiction

Hi @KiriTanah 

As @Bree-RO said in her posts before - you have an incredible level of insight around your triggers, and great strategies already in place to look after yourself. 

When you're feeling triggered, are there things that can help in the moment? 

For some people, it can help to do something distracting like playing a game on your phone, or going for a walk, or playing an instrument.. sometimes it can help to do something that connects you with your body, like having a shower, or doing exercise... what do you think might work for you? 

 

Your question about what to do if it become too much, makes me think about safety planning. While you're feeling well, it's a good time to make a plan for the times when you're not feeling well. This can be as simple as a note in your phone, or on paper -  about what to do when you're feeling anxious, paranoid etc. It can include some numbers to call - such as the ones mentioned before in this thread, activities to do , and places to go to remain safe. 


If you have thoughts about harming yourself, it's very important to talk to someone right away such as SCBS - 1300 659 467. 

 

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