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Re: preparing for tough or triggering times

Hi @scared01 thanks for the tag Smiley Happy 

 

I can really empathise with your anxiety about April, I've got a couple of anniversaries coming up as well and struggling to deal with the memories...

 

I'm planning a couple of distractions for the worst day similar to @Hozzles, just family stuff that will take a lot of mental energy and really make me concentrate on what's happening right now. 

 

I'm also thinking about stuff I can do to make myself safer, like I'm tossing up whether to give my self harm tools to my psychologist to dispose. And just putting things in my environment that make me feel better like posters and moving my self care box so it's more accessible. Maybe scheduling in some more supports and appointments over the month. 

 

I'm not in a great head space right now but I'll come back to this thread once I'm able to have a bit more of a think Heart

Re: preparing for tough or triggering times

thanks @DruidChild
i hope some suggestions here mgiht be able to help you too Heart

do you want to tag me to your current thread and we can chat? more than happy to listen
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**

Re: preparing for tough or triggering times

Hey @scared01,

 

Thanks for the tag. Sorry to hear that April is a rough month for you. 

 

I think the others have made some awesome suggestions! For me, when I know there's an anniversary or something challenging coming up, I try to tee up some additional support before the event arises. That way, when I'm in a clearer state of mind and can mention to a person that x date will be challenging, would you mind hanging out with me/checking in on me that day. Or I would organise to do something that would keep me distracted/is something I enjoy. 

 

As the others mentioned, I think both self care and distractions are super important when tough times arise, especially if things are going to pop up across an entire month. I like to gauge within myself whether self care or a distraction (or both!) would be most useful depending on how I'm feeling at any given time. Perhaps writing a list of things that help when certain emotions arise? Ie when you feel 'x' going for a walk helps, when you feel 'y' watching your favourite tv show helps etc.

 

Another thing that stands out to me is taking the time to reflect upon why you're feeling a certain way. For me, there's a couple of anniversaries throughout the year that involve losing somebody close to me, so I like to take the time on that day reflecting upon my memories with that person and honouring the role they play/ed in my life. On the other hand, when it's an anniversary of an event/something I've been through etc I would focus on what I have milestones and things I achieved since then. It kind of gives you the power over the situation, rather than the situation power over you. That's only something that's been effective for me though and may not work for yourself or others!

 

One other thing is I try things that I know will be triggering. For example, if I know there's something coming up or I'm going through a tough time, logging onto the forums may do more harm than good, so I choose to stay away from a potentially triggering situation. 

 

This ended up being super long, sorry @scared01! I hope there's something useful for you within all of that? Sending lots of support your way while you navigate April.

Re: preparing for tough or triggering times

Thank you for tagging me! Hmm I guess it depends on the situation, I think looking at the big picture helps. perhaps write a list or get a wall planner to organise your month so that you know what you have each day. I think also take the time to have time for yourself, working out is really good stress release for me, so I normally try and keep as on routine as possible! Which mainly for me just means I get an hour of exercise in each day.

Re: preparing for tough or triggering times

thank you so much @Sunflower18 @keezeik
these are really great suggestions and ways to cope! thank you for sharing as im sure its helping more than just me too
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**
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Re: preparing for tough or triggering times

Hey @scared01, the others have provided some awesome suggestions/advice on how to go about this, but I thought I should share my own techniques to cope with tough or triggering times as well (because the more the merrier, right? Haha). From previous experience in dealing with these tough/triggering times, I find setting up a "reward" system helps. That is, for each triggering event I go through, afterwards, I would "treat" myself by doing a self-care activity. Does that make sense? Do you reckon you might find this helpful?
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Hope is just around the corner; you think it's not there when you first look straight ahead, but it actually is when you turn around

Re: preparing for tough or triggering times

thats a really good idea @Esperanza67 thank you Smiley Happy
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**

Re: preparing for tough or triggering times

No worries @scared01! How are you finding these tips that the others have suggested for dealing with tough times?
_________________________________________________________
Hope is just around the corner; you think it's not there when you first look straight ahead, but it actually is when you turn around

Re: preparing for tough or triggering times

they are quite good @Esperanza67
ive got a few busy days in april so despite being abit more tired i will also be more distracted in those days. and when i see my psychologist im going to ask if i can maybe do an extra session (so one session each week for 3 weeks) just for that bit of extra support.
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**

Re: preparing for tough or triggering times

im also going to stock up on some colouring in pages, new textas/pencils and gather some painting stuff so i can do those activities as well
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**