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Re: really struggling

Hey @scared01 , thank you for tagging and checking in with us all, and letting us know how you are at the moment Heart It's definitely valid to stick to certain threads and respond when/if you feel you can. Honestly, I do the same when I'm feeling overwhelmed, and things sound really intense for you right now 

 

Those sound like really conflicting and confusing emotions Smiley Sad Feeling lonely but having a hard time being around people is such a frustrating and awful combination!

You mentioned that you've not talked about your health and tests to many people, which is more than fair Heart I was wondering how that was sitting with you? Heart

 

I just wanted to echo what the others have said and say that I'm thinking of you and sending you a massive virtual hug Heart How are things today?




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We had a live chat on Accessing Mental Health Support Online! Smiley Very Happy Check it out here! Heart
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Re: really struggling

@scared01  I hope everything goes well and that you can feel better. Heart It can be so overwhelming to have a bunch of tests going on and not have definite answers or know the way forward.

I've had some reviews the past few weeks. The ultrasound I had was back to normal which was good. Smiley Happy I also don't have to see my urologist for one and a half years unless I end up with pain again which will suggest I am having another 'event'. In which case, I have to go back to emergency and the hospital will call the urologist to come in and see what he can do. This is because I am a private patient though.
The main thing now is drinking more water and consuming more citrus to try to prevent it from happening again. He also hopes that the nephrologist he referred me to will be able to suggest a tablet or something else to prevent it because he said if I were his child at that age with this problem, he would want to see what more can be done to prevent it.

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Re: really struggling

hey @Claire-RO
I haven't been sleeping well because of the way ive been feeling and just cause I think of all of the emotional distress lately. but I do have chronic insomnia anyway so not sleeping is pretty usual for me.
I did have abit of a busy day today so it was distracting. I need to keep busy tomorrow to try and pass the day away ready for Fridays appointment. I have 2 things I need to do but ill have to try and find other things to do too
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**
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Re: really struggling

thanks @Tay100 Heart
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**
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Re: really struggling

hey @ecla34
it really is so conflicting. its like not wanting to be lonely but not wanting to be around people. gosh its tricky knowing what to do!

im not really an open person, I tend to keep my cards close to my chest but sometimes it would be nice to have someone care about me and want to listen and ask how I am (and know the honest answer not what they want to hear). every person I talk to is basically paid sadly.
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**
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Re: really struggling

hey @WheresMySquishy
sorry I missed your post earlier, thank you for responding.
im glad that your results have come back good, did they find out what it is though? (you of course don't have to answer that)
I really hope everything is ok though. a 1.5 yr checkup is a good outcome by the sounds of it!
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**
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Re: really struggling

Hello @scared01 , I am sorry to hear that you have not been sleeping well because of your recent emotional distress. It must be really hard for you to feel energised when you have not been able to get a good rest. Busy days can be overwhelming at times, but it is amazing how fast they go by. I hope that tomorrow goes by quickly again so that Friday is here and you are able to attend your appointment.

I understand what you mean when you mention that you want people to care and listen but that everyone that you talk to is paid. But, I believe that just because it is that persons job to talk with you to see how you are going, it does not mean that they don't genuinely care for you and care about what you are saying. I hope that you believe this too! We also care about you here at Reach Out and want to hear your stories Heart
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Re: really struggling

@scared01  They found out that I had calcium oxalate, calcium phosphate and carbonate kidney stones. One of them (10mm in size) dropped into my left ureter and caused a moderate obstruction and swelling that needed two surgeries to fix. The urologist also discovered during the second surgery that I had plaques in my kidney that the stones were growing on, kind of like how a grape grows. We don't really know what caused me to have this (tumours have been ruled out) other than the family history and not drinking enough water and low citrate levels.
I'm happy with the outcome too! My parents aren't impressed that I still have two stones remaining but they aren't causing any symptoms and aren't as big as the 10mm one. I have to have an ultrasound every time before seeing him.

I hope that you have a good outcome too and the doctors can work out what is wrong. Heart

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Re: really struggling

@WheresMySquishy  oh wow, that must of been quite the ordeal for you- Do you have to slowly increase your Vit C levels overtime? I do hope it's smooth sailing from here- keep us updated on the doctor's visits! 

 

@scared01 about what you said "every person I talk to is basically paid sadly." please know that is perfectly ok and something that many people have to do, there should be no shame in doing what you have to be healthy, especially if you feel like you can't get the kind of space at home right now. Of course, we can listen here too Smiley Happy

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Re: really struggling

hi @TOM-RO @WheresMySquishy @Tay100

im not sure it really ever ends with this stupid body. if its not one thing its another. its so tiring trying to constantly manage pain.

its been a quieter day then I had expected but did get some things done. I don't really have many plans for tomorrow now either. I will try to find some things to do though. will prob try to make the most of the nice weather and get some clothes washing done.
I get where your all coming from when it comes to talking to paid people and them still caring but sometimes it would be nice to msg a friend or family member and just go out for a coffee or ask if could talk to them or just have a normal relationship with someone. if I want to share my problems I have to talk to someone who is paid.


wow @WheresMySquishy that mustve been painful! im glad they found out whats happening though and know what is causing it, treatments or looking into options at least.
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**