Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Re: want to help my 18 y/o son

Hey Helpless Dad,

Hope things are ok. It is a tough road we travel,. Hope your son has found someone he can talk to about his issues. Have you found some support for yourself?

I have found a book on the internet ( I know.What did we do without it) and reading it helped me put things in perspective. It didn't make it easier, it just showed me how to deal withm y feelings, so I could clearly see the situation. It doesn't offer  solutions to our problems, btw, It is called How to let go of our Adult Children.

It is scary when we can't do anything to help, even though we want to.

I wish you all the best.

Stressed mum   Smiley Happy


Re: want to help my 18 y/o son

my brother is the exact same as your son, he has no respect for anyone. you just need to cut him off, so everything that he expects you to do, dont do it, eg washing, cookinging, cleaning , giving him money, then soon he will come asking for it and it is at this point where you explain why he issant getting the same treatment, and tell him how you feel he has changed and how it has impacted you.


Re: want to help my 18 y/o son

It has been a few months since I last posted and fortunately things have turned around. Unfortunately through a sad set of circumstances that helped break the downward spiral my son was in.


Firstly, my father passed away in November after a month in hospital. A number of visits (8 hour roundtrips) to the city and the grief of the experience had a temporary impact on my son but he was soon back to his ways.


The event that really broke the cycle was a breast cancer diagnosis of my wife’s niece, a young mother with 3 kids under 8. My wife, son and daughter quickly headed out to outback NSW to provide support. We visited there often over the years and my son absolutely loved it there. On this occasion when he came home he announced he wanted to move out there and was never going to touch marijuana again.  This was music to my ears but …


A couple of months later, the move has happened, he is working hard on the family farm and is too busy and buggered to be side-tracked on to other things. So far, so good. Thanks to everyone for there encouragement when I was in the thick of it.

Re: want to help my 18 y/o son

Hey @helpless dad thanks for coming back and keeping us updated! I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of your father and the health troubles of your wife's niece. However it's really great that your son has been inspired to turn things around, especially giving up the weed. If any challenges present themselves in the future, don't forget that he (and you!) can always speak to a counsellor at Lifeline on 13 11 14.



Re: want to help my 18 y/o son

hey @helpless dad 

Sorry to hear about your father passing and the breast cancer diagnosis in the family, that really sucks

Im glad that your son is doing good though, thanks for keeping us updated and feel free to stop by any time!