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what if

What if making the appointment with the GP is too scary?

What if I get there and chicken out, and can't even hand them the piece of paper where I've written things down as a backup?

What if I can't even get the words on paper to make the backup note?

What if they say it's not 'bad enough'?

What if I really am making a big deal out of nothing?

What if I get past all those other "what if's" and it all that goes fine, and then I have to make more appointments and deal with more people and more trying to explain feelings I can't even make sense of?

 

I don't think I can do it. It seems so stupid and useless saying that, but it's true. There's too many steps and the end result might not even get me anywhere different. I just can't even if I want to.

Re: what if

Oh @Bay82VU I have heaps to say, just thought I should comment first to let you know I get it! I truly do mate, all those questions ran through my mind when I started going to headspace and still do (but no where near as much). Did you try eheadspace that I suggested to you? 

//You can stay afraid, or slit the throat of fear and be brave//

Re: what if

What if making the appointment with the GP is too scary?

  • Then we will be here to support you through it
  • Or you could start with the health directory to get some more info so you are more familiar with what might be said at the doctors and its less scary

 

What if I get there and chicken out, and can't even hand them the piece of paper where I've written things down as a backup?

  • Then you can try again the next day
  • And we will still be here to support you through it

 

What if I can't even get the words on paper to make the backup note?

  • The only way you will know is by trying

 

What if they say it's not 'bad enough'?

  • Then you can get a second opinion

 

What if I really am making a big deal out of nothing?

  • Then you will be glad to have seen someone to have sorted it out and at least get it off your mind. It's better to be safe than sorry.

 

What if I get past all those other "what if's" and it all that goes fine, and then I have to make more appointments and deal with more people and more trying to explain feelings I can't even make sense of?

  • Then you will be on your way to feeling better and getting through this
  • And... we will still be here to support you

 

You are so strong and you are such an amazing part of the forums. We will be here to support you through whatever is going on Heart

lanejane

Re: what if

What if it's all worth it to get the support you deserve?

 

Taking that first step towards professional help is undeniably intimidating, but it's also rewarding. If you're worried about what to expect in any part of the process, you have loads of people here on Reach Out who can share their experiences with you, not to mention all the fact sheets on the main site - like these.

 

I noticed you tried out the Turning Negatives Into Positives thread once. It can really help to look for those silver linings and reframe negative self-talk into something more constructive. Keen to give it another crack?

Re: what if

@Bay82VU you won't know if you don't try.  If you aim at nothing you hit it everytime!

By the way, what if all of these things do happen? You are a strong person and you will survive and continue on buddy.  Life has very few guarantees and you just have to give it a crack.  Rather than shaping your thoughts as avoiding risks, try seeing these events as opportunities. 

I remember the first time i asked out a girl in year 8, i was so nervous and kept thinking 'what if she says no? what if she says yes and i make a fool of myself?' I decided that if these 'what ifs' did happen i'd be back at square one and could handle what came my way.  Regardless, she said yes and i DID procede to make a fool of myself as year 8's have a great ability of doing... Shaking in my boots! Armpit sweat, the works.. points is, have a crack!

Re: what if

@j95 Thanks, it helps to know I'm not the only one who's been stuck with trying to think past these questions, and that you got past them to get help from headspace. I tried eheadspace a couple of times but it seems like it's too slow paced during the actual chat so nothing gets covered and I dunno if they can help.

 

Thanks for the support @lanejane  . I tried writing stuff down after clearing my head with a soccer game and ended up with too much lol... So I'll just have to summarise it when I'm ready to read back over it. 

 

@ElleBelle  and @tsnyder  - Thanks, I know you guys are right. I guess if I take it step by step then there's fewer arguments against each step in isolation.

Re: what if

@Bay82VU 

 

Why don't you try making a plan? For example:

 

On friday I will call the doctor to make an appointment. If it is too hard for me and I am unable to make an appointment I will try again on Monday.

 

If I get to the appointment and I feel overhwelmed I will take a seat and practice breathing techniques

 

If I get into the doctors office and I am finding it hard to talk about what's going on I will hand over my note that explains it (even if it is a little too detailed it will help the doctor to understand)

 

If the advice I get from the doctor is not what I am looking for, I will book another appointment before I leave with another doctor because I am committed to finding a way to feel better

 

 

lanejane

Re: what if

@lanejane  I get that it should totally be that simple to plan it out and do it, but it's just not

Re: what if

Hey  @Bay82VU , I know you're worried about there being so many steps but sometimes having a lot of different steps and stages can actually be really great. Whenever I'm faced with something tough and I'm finding it really hard to tackle I like to break it down into small steps so I can be like "Okay, I've managed to accomplish this today, I can take some time to chill out, relax, gather my thoughts and center myself before I take the next step tomorow." 

 

But, I also wanted to add that I think you're really underestimating yourself here! You've already taking the first step! Posting on Reach Out about your worries! And you even have made a kind of a plan without realising it - you're really considering going to the doctors and you've even thought about writing things down to take with you! I think that's a really great start to a plan, and I think writing things down is an amazing thing to think of! A lot of people would not have thought of that and I think it shows how thoughtful you actually are about planing.

Re: what if

I dunno, breaking one big step into multiple smaller ones is different to having lots of steps to begin with.

 

I don't think I can do it. I know exactly what I need to do, but can't bring myself to do it.

I'm afraid of talking to people on the phone, afraid of dealing with receptionists in person, then I'm supposed to try and talk to the doctor, and maybe I'll have to do all that all over again as if that wasn't bad enough... It's fucking stupid as all hell. I know there wouldn't be any problem if I booked and I'd get it done just fine but I can't fucking call. I spent hours trying to convince myself to just do it but it just made it harder. I suck so fucking much. I even had to pause halfway through the the GP video because it was too awkward to even watch in one go.