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[CHAT] The (sometimes) ugly aftermath of relationships

OR RELATIONSHITS, AMIRITE?

 

Let’s be real for a second: relationships can be pretty great. You meet someone who you think is the cutest, funniest, most excellent person, and – even better – they think that you are the cutest, funniest, most excellent person. You go on dates and invent nicknames for each other and walk all over the place holding hands, and in between the nicknames and the unintentional exercise, a strong bond based on mutual respect, trust and love develops.

 

GR1

 

Sometimes though, things don’t work out like that forever. Maybe you both live too far away from each other. Maybe the parents don’t like you. It could even be irreconcilably different music tastes. Whatever it is, sometimes relationships have to end. The ending itself can be hard – there might be a lot of yelling or ignoring or mind games before you both finally call it off.

 

GR2

 

And the aftermath can be just as tough - you still wish for the feeling of love and being loved, and sometimes it can feel like no-one you know can lift you from the dumps.

 

It can be even more difficult when the ending is sudden or complicated. Your partner might have sprung it on you, or maybe your different backgrounds might get in the way of you being together. It can really be like a sudden loss – you no longer have the security of a loved one caring for you and being with you no matter what. It can be difficult for you mentally, and even physically, and you might even do things that you regret, and would never do in any other circumstance.

 

So that begs the question: How can you deal with a breakup, in a healthy and supported way? Tune in to Monday's Getting Real session - 23rd Feb at 8pm AEST for tips and support, and probably a few stories too.

 

Re: [CHAT] The (sometimes) ugly aftermath of relationships

Hey everyone, and welcome to tonight’s GR session. The topic: breakups – when to break up, what it’s like to go through a breakup and how to handle a breakup in a healthy way. We’re anticipating a host of great stories, alongside advice and rants.

 

Tonight, our chat will be moderated by @lanejane and myself. We’d like you to remember to have a read of – and follow – the community guidelines, for maximum enjoyment and safety for all. If at any time things get too intense and you need to talk to someone, check out emergency help.

 

First question for the night: When you’re in a relationship are break ups something you can prevent? If so, how?

Re: [CHAT] The (sometimes) ugly aftermath of relationships

Hi everyone! Super excited for tonights session. I certainly have some length break up experiences Smiley Tongue I'm sure a few of us do.

 

 

lanejane

Re: [CHAT] The (sometimes) ugly aftermath of relationships

When you’re in a relationship are break ups something you can prevent? If so, how?

 

I think sometimes break ups are something you can prevent. Like, if you set some ground rules at the beginning that can always help to prevent break ups and conflict later down the track. It's always best to know what you AND your partner want out of a relationship before getting into one.

 

What about you @safari93 ?

lanejane

Re: [CHAT] The (sometimes) ugly aftermath of relationships

I think it depends on the actual relationship and people, like if you can feel something may happen then you probably couldn't prevent it but if you are just going through a rough time you just have to try and work through it.

Re: [CHAT] The (sometimes) ugly aftermath of relationships

@lanejane definitely!! It can be hard to avoid them sometimes, although it doesn't mean you break up over the slightest thing. If you think you can work through the problem with your partner, then a breakup could be avoided for a while

Re: [CHAT] The (sometimes) ugly aftermath of relationships

@Dreamer 95 welcome!! And yeah sometimes things outside of a relationship can be too much to be able to work through

Re: [CHAT] The (sometimes) ugly aftermath of relationships

Hey @Dreamer 95 

 

Thanks for joining us tonight Smiley Happy

 

You're so right. It really can depend on the people and the relationship itself. Sometimes you can't really help or stop a break up if it's something someone wants, or if there are external things getting in the way.

lanejane

Re: [CHAT] The (sometimes) ugly aftermath of relationships

Hey everyone! Smiley Happy

 

When you’re in a relationship are break ups something you can prevent? If so, how?

Wow, that's a tough question! If you're in a relationship and you really care about the person, then yup, preventing a break-up is high priority. Preventing this from happening may not always go smoothly. But I think that noting how certain actions/words are nasty and hurtful, and not doing them again is one way of preventing them. Oh, and keeping promises and following thorugh, of course!

 

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Stay excellent

Re: [CHAT] The (sometimes) ugly aftermath of relationships

@safari93 & @Dreamer 95 

 

what sort of things do you think can be too much to work through?

lanejane