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Re: [CHAT] White Ribbon Day & healthy relationships

Thank you I will be back next week
//You can stay afraid, or slit the throat of fear and be brave//

Re: [CHAT] White Ribbon Day & healthy relationships

That's great feedback @stonepixie and thanks everyone for tonight - all your input has made tonight a great chat. Thanks for sharing your experiences.

Online Community Manager

Re: [CHAT] White Ribbon Day & healthy relationships

Hey everyone, that's it for our session tonight! Thank you so much to everyone getting involved! We know it was a really hard topic tonight and we're so proud that we were able to all talk about it and come up with some really cool ideas!  Violence against women is a serious issue and something that definitely needs to be talked about everywhere - at home, in the streets, at school, at work and here on the internet. Don't forget there are some amazing services out there like 1800 RESPECT if you feel like you need to talk about anything! 


We all came up with so many great answers and discussion points so my summary is a little bit long, but here is everything we covered tonight! Again, you all did a great job and @Chessca_H , @Sophie-RO  and I want to thank you Smiley Very Happy Heart


What kind of places did we learn about healthy /unhealthy relationships?

  • Friends that had healthy relationships.
  • Role models.
  • Family.
  • Church.

What kind of things did we thing made up healthy relationships?

  • Takes you seriously.
  • Praises you, doesn’t put you down.
  • Listens to you.
  • Doesn’t try to change or control you.
  • Openess.
  • Honesty.
  • Love.
  • Has to be a two-way street (ie. they respect us and we respect them).

What are some good ways to teach others about healthy / unhealthy relationships?

  • Parents teaching children about healthy relationships.
  • Breaking down the taboo’s surrounding abuse / unhealthy relationships by talking about it more.
  • Books, tvs and movies.
  • The media – showing examples of healthy relationships.
  • School, university.
  • Community movements.

What are some early warning signs of an abusive partner?

  • Manipulation.
  • You feel like you can’t talk to them.
  • They lose their temper quickly.
  • They blame others for their problems/behaviour.
  • They criticise you and make you doubt yourself.
  • They make you feel guilty.
  • They don’t give you personal space (ie. spying on you, want to know where you are all the time). They need constant contact.
  • Jealousy (they wnat you all to themselves).
  • Cycle – sweet and caring until they put you down.
  • Playing the victim.
  • They isolate you.

What do we think about victim blaming and the idea that “women should just leave” abusive relationships?

  • People underestimate isolation.
  • People don’t understand how dangerous and scary it can be.
  • Victims may not have resources like fiancés, access to a car, safe housing.
  • Children and pets might stop people from leaving.
  • They might feel it’s safer to stay.
  • Maybe they don’t w ant to leave.
  • Possibility that abusers might be able to get help.
  • We should change the language (ie. Making it “Why doesn’t HE stop?”)
  • Address how our culture portrays the issue.
  • Understand and change myths (including about male abuse).

How do we think that we could help a woman who was in an experiencing an abusive situation?

  • Let them know you’re there for them.
  • Be as supportive as possible.
  • Try not to push them too hard.
  • Give them lots of resources.
  • Remain in contact, counter-balance the isolation.

What can young men and other community members do to end the violence? What kind of barriers are there for them?

  • Call their mates out (BARRIER: but then their friends might isolate them).
  • Learn about healthy and unhealthy relationships.

What are some good resources, places or people that might be able to help and support women in abusive situations?

  • Reach out!
  • The GP.
  • Counselling services.
  • Family / community services.
  • Womens refugees.
  • Family and friends.
  • The internet.
  • 1800 respect.

What is something that we could do to help stop violence against women?


Re: [CHAT] White Ribbon Day & healthy relationships

Thanks so much to everyone who participated in today's session, I hope you all have a good night! Smiley Happy