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Re: [SLOW-MO CHAT] Supporting the men in our lives

I was literally thinking of Terry Crews as I was writing my answer yesterday @Esperanza67 @missep! It goes to show that everyone is affected by these issues, even if you're rich, famous, and have enormous muscles (he was a former NFL player). Shout out to /r/CrewsCrew on Reddit! Heart

 

How can we encourage men to seek help when they need it?

I think part of it is through breaking down the stigma, through initiatives like Movember. Part of it is also about developing emotional intelligence in young boys, so they have the skills and strategies to handle things as an adult. The third thing, I think, is giving men space to talk and taking them seriously when they do try and open up.

 

Would love to hear what some of our male-identifying forum users think

@mrmusic @FootyFan26 @redhead @LeoTheLion @BunnyWalks @RevzZ @Asche Smiley Very Happy

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No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish

Re: [SLOW-MO CHAT] Supporting the men in our lives

We can encourage :

- them to acknowledge their feelings good and bad.

- negative emotions are a regular phenomenon and there is no shame in experiencing them ( like doubt or anxiousness)

- encourage them to be accepting of their emotions.

- allow them to compliment on their own output ( art and if possible work)

As an Asian male when it comes to work we learn to suppress how we feel about it and only the very challenging ones are worth doing.

We can help dudes to appreciate their tiny gestures too.

I read somewhere that men feel loved when they are admired.

We can admire them verbally when they take action to change or intervene in their behavior.

@lokifish without going too far I reckon I don't know much about being a nurturing person and I may need help in this area.
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Re: [SLOW-MO CHAT] Supporting the men in our lives

Hi @BunnyWalks I think you’ve got some excellent ideas there. I especially like the comment about allowing men to compliment their work. I know my own partner has trouble admitting when he’s done a good job at anything. Particularly with cooking he is his own worst critic and doesn’t like to boast. So I agree that encouraging pride in accomplishments, even small ones, is a step in the right direction. Especially when helping with self esteem and mental health. Great contribution thank you! 

Re: [SLOW-MO CHAT] Supporting the men in our lives

@BunnyWalks Those are some great ideas! Smiley Happy

 

Time for our next question!

5. Do you know a man who has struggled with their mental health? How did it affect you/others around them?

 

@Libellule @lokifish @Esperanza67 @missep @Bee @LeoTheLion @scared01 @Chrysalis89

Re: [SLOW-MO CHAT] Supporting the men in our lives

@mrmusic@Libellule@BunnyWalks@lokifish@Esperanza67

 

I have just read through this discussion and am loving everyone's contributions - it has really made me think, made me smile, and made me sad for the ways in which men are discouraged from seeking help and speaking openly about mental health.

But there is so much hope in the ways this conversation is being had nationally - with movember being a great example - and men everyone becoming more open about their emotions. 
I hope one day the definition of being a "man" includes being vulnerable, crying, and showing the whole spectrum of human emotions.

 

5. Do you know a man who has struggled with their mental health? How did it affect you/others around them?

 

I know many men who have struggled with their mental health - infact I don't think I know any who haven't. 

The men I know as friends, colleagues, and family members who have struggled with their mental health, have found it harder than the women in my life, to seek out support and speak up. However, when they did, they found a lot of freedom in being able to unpack the tougher things in life, and move towards a greater understanding of their feelings, and their coping strategies. 

 

I have found it hard at times to see the men I love struggle with their mental health, because they can be reluctant to get help. It can be a slow journey, and takes patience.. but I hope that as masculinity changes , the journey to help and support becomes easier and quicker for men.  

 

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Re: [SLOW-MO CHAT] Supporting the men in our lives

4. How can we encourage men to seek help when they need it?

 

I reckon by having more famous men (like Terry Crews) speaking up about their experiences to help break down the stigma surrounding men seeking help.

 

5. Do you know a man who has struggled with their mental health? How did it affect you/others around them?

Yep, I know of several! And yeah, it definitely did affect me and others around them. 

 

But yeah, I agree with you @gina-RO, I also hope that as the perception behind masculinity changes, more men will become encouraged to seek help more quickly, especially since I still know of so many men who are reluctant to seek professional help as they believe they can "tough it out".

 

 

Re: [SLOW-MO CHAT] Supporting the men in our lives

Loving the discussion and how involved people are! It's fabulous to see! Heart

4. How can we encourage men to seek help when they need it?

@lokifish @Libellule @BunnyWalks Have answered this question beautifully and I cannot think of anything else to add Heart

 

5. Do you know a man who has struggled with their mental health? How did it affect you/others around them?

Like @gina-RO I know of a few men who have struggled with their mental health. Since I wasn't super close with them around the time they really struggled with their mental health I'm unsure how it affected those around them, but in saying that I know from experience that living with a person who struggles with their mental health can be challenging.

 


Getting Real: SCAVENGER HUNT RO STYLE!
Don't forget to practice self-care regularly!

Re: [SLOW-MO CHAT] Supporting the men in our lives

Awesome discussion as usual everyone!

6. Is there a man you look up to as a role model? If so, tell us about them (Remember not to disclose identifying details about them as per guidelines Smiley Happy)

 

@mrmusic @Esperanza67 @gina-RO @Libellule @BunnyWalks @N1ghtW1ng @lokifish

 


Getting Real: SCAVENGER HUNT RO STYLE!
Don't forget to practice self-care regularly!

Re: [SLOW-MO CHAT] Supporting the men in our lives

My role model would be tutor I had in when I was 16 to 17. I met him at a tuition centre as a kid.

He was assertive and knew how to control a room. He was effective at his job.

He could keep the noisy kids quite for all of us to learn. Although assertive he was approachable and a reasonable person just don't upset him during his time.

Gave something we needed as a class.

Re: [SLOW-MO CHAT] Supporting the men in our lives

@BunnyWalks sounds like an awesome role model!

 

I have been trying to think of an awesome male role model and the only one that I can say I still look up to even though he's no longer part of my life was my Year 8 German Teacher. I have previously shared this a few times, but he had a great sense of humour and a no-nonsense demeanour about him and people always respected him, he was tough but so very fair. We had done a test or something and a student asked if they had failed and he said "Have you done your best? If so, then no you haven't failed. If you haven't done your best, then yes you failed... yourself" 

This has stuck by me ever since that moment, and I've always tried to remind myself of that when stressing about exams or marks, my best is all that matters. Sure I may need to revise or study something further to get a better mark, but if I did my best I could be happy with that Smiley Happy

 

This brings me to today's question (Sorry it's posted so late everyone, weekends are hard to get questions up, so we might try to keep weekends purely for wrap-ups)

7. What's one thing you can take away from this chat for the future?

 

If you haven't joined in the chat yet, feel free to answer some, all or all the questions or have your say Smiley Happy 

@mrmusic @Esperanza67 @gina-RO @Libellule @BunnyWalks @N1ghtW1ng @lokifish

 


Getting Real: SCAVENGER HUNT RO STYLE!
Don't forget to practice self-care regularly!