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Re: SLOW-MO GR: Family Changes, 7th-11th October

What did you do to cope with this change? What support is out there available to us?

 

Chatting with my mum about it helped a lot, as she felt the same way I was feeling about it at the time as well.

 

In terms of coping with family changes in general, I think that speaking to someone about it can be helpful. However, when talking face-to-face to someone is not possible, then I think posting a thread on the forums is a good idea to gain other people's perspective on it, especially if they have been in the same position too. Perhaps reaching out to other mental health supports like Kids Helpline and Lifeline can also help too, especially if becomes all too pain-inducing in terms of emotions at that moment.

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Hope is just around the corner; you think it's not there when you first look straight ahead, but it actually is when you turn around

Re: SLOW-MO GR: Family Changes, 7th-11th October

Hi everyone. 👋 

I'm so yeah me and my brother catch up every now and then but we don't talk as much as we used to. Yeah it's lonleyer now but I have had a bit of a chat to my councillor about it but we didn't really get to much of a solution. But it's ok. 

 

What did you do to cope with this change? What support is out there available to us? 

 I cope with these changes by exepting that change is a part of life and I catch up with my councillor when the loneliness really hits and if she is to busy to help. I sometimes connect to kids helpline web chat and have a chat to a wonderful councillor. The thing I like about talking to diffrent people (councillor, teachers, friends, etc) I get a diffrent perspective on thing and it helps me see things from another side. And I try and catch up with my brother as much as possible even if it's only threw a phone call every now and then, and it makes the times I see him more valuable. And every chance I get I let him know he's a good brother.

 

Change is a part of life and it can make us sad at times, but change is a constant part of life. Change is the only thing we can really be shore of in life.

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Re: SLOW-MO GR: Family Changes, 7th-11th October

Thanks @Bre-RO @Esperanza67 and @ecla34 Heart Smiley Happy
I really appreciate all your kind words 😊

While I was writing that yea I didn’t feel great. I was crying just thinking about it all but I do get to see one of my brothers more now. I don’t see the other one tho because he lives on his own and I haven’t seen him after seeing him in hospital from the suicide attempt. That would’ve been another huge change for my family if I lost him 😥 I’m crying again thinking about that! I seriously can’t hold it in when it comes to this topic
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Re: SLOW-MO GR: Family Changes, 7th-11th October

What did you do to cope with this change? What support is out there available to us?
I did a lot of research about how best to support my family members. There were a lot of useful sites and services for their conditions. I found carers' websites to be a big help too.
Here is a really helpful list I found for services for young carers. I filled out the forms on this website and it gave me some PDFs about the skills I have obtained as a carer, which might be useful for future positions. I also found this resource really helpful (thanks ReachOut!)
I often talked to my extended family about it. They listened to me and helped out a lot with the practical stuff, such as mobility equipment and major transferring tasks.
One of the things I found really helpful was keeping a calendar or diary of the appointments, tasks, my volunteering shifts and other activities. I would have been so lost otherwise.
I love watching TV shows, playing games, writing and listening to and reading stories to distract myself. My sister has similar ways of coping, so it's good that we have some things that we can do together.

@ecla34  I found websites and online resources to be helpful for my own chronic conditions, especially when trying to explain them to other people and finding exercises I can do. Although, I tend to stay away from forums now because it can get kind of depressing hearing about 'magic cures' and things that have worked for other people, because my eye doctors haven't managed to get my eye conditions under control yet. It can also be disheartening reading that the treatment I am on has only been effective for 10-15% of people in studies or that the reason that I have to get it from a compounding pharmacy is because there is limited evidence of its effectiveness as a branded prescription drug. Websites for my family members' conditions were really helpful though. I guess it really depends on the condition.

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Re: SLOW-MO GR: Family Changes, 7th-11th October

Hi @Bananatime04

 

I’m sorry to hear how hard this topic has been for you, it sounds like this topic might be close to home at the moment Heart It is 100% okay to sit this activity out if the topic is upsetting or hits a nerve- you wellbeing is important Heart

 

We trust you can work out what activities are going to be helpful or unhelpful in the moment, and encourage you to access your supports if you need to Heart 

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Re: SLOW-MO GR: Family Changes, 7th-11th October

Hey @Jess1-RO  Smiley Happy

i haven’t seen you around for ages! I missed you!
I might sit this one out if that’s ok.. it is a bit hard for me. Thank you 

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Re: SLOW-MO GR: Family Changes, 7th-11th October

Completely understand Smiley Happy You can also unsubscribe from this thread too if you don't want the email reminders or notifications Heart 

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Re: SLOW-MO GR: Family Changes, 7th-11th October

This can definitely be a tough one to chat about, so thank you to everyone who has contributed so far! Heart

 

Time for another question:

 

Do you have any advice/an experience you'd like to share about changes in your family? For example, what lifestyle changes should we expect when we live away from home? 

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No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish
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Re: SLOW-MO GR: Family Changes, 7th-11th October

I haven’t really had any problems with my family until this year.
My family are Christian, and I am too. But that’s not what I want to say.

1. Last term, I was dealing with a whole lot of stress, burn out, and family issues. Possibly even undiagnosed depression. Term 3 is always the most stressful time of year, and it was particularly hard for me. I was dealing with bullying, assignments that were all due in the same week, and just low self esteem in general. For my English assignment, I had to write a ‘Literary Analysis’. This was very tough, with a new structure that was brought in to make work “easier”. I was working on it very hard with my mum, and then I hand it in on the Friday it was due. I was allowed to work on it after school, and email it later on. I chose not to, because I just wanted it over and not to be worried about it anymore. Mum grounded me for it. I feel like she was comparing me to my younger sister, who is getting better grades than I ever did in year 7. She even got a Diamond GPA award, where I never got close to a Sapphire. I felt so bad, that I created a drawing, saying that I was sorry for being alive.
I don’t feel that as much now, but it’s still there. And even then, as soon as I got to high school, my attitude changed, and I noticed it myself. I’m dirty minded, and everything has ruined my family in ways I will never understand.
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Re: SLOW-MO GR: Family Changes, 7th-11th October

2. I tried very hard to cope with the change I had to put up with, but I didn’t know what to do. So I just made myself really depressed and sad. Which is why I’m not doing the best right now.

 

3. I can’t really answer this question, but I am willing to read some advice...