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redhead
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 10:01 PM

Cheers everyone 🙂 have a good night
===========================
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
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Ben-RO
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 10:03 PM

Thank you for running the show @safari93 @stonepixie

 

And thank you for your amazing insights and contributions @redhead @FootyFan26 @j95 @N1ghtW1ng

 

Have a most excellent snooze y'all!  

safari93
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:57 PM

We all have plenty of different ways to take a break. Reading, watching TV, listening to music, physical activity like walking and exercise, catching up with friends, sleeping, even being on the forums!

 

All these activities that we do (apart from making us feel great) can be relaxing, distracting, or even both! The same activity can be a form of relaxation in one situation and a distraction in the other, or perhaps the reason why we do them could determine whether an activity is distracting or relaxing

 

So how do you tell the difference? It seems to be partly due to the situation – why are you doing this activity? Are you unwinding after a stressful event? Are you trying to avoid something stressful? Do you need time to process some intense feelings? In short, are you recovering from something, or escaping? You may also be able to tell by how you feel afterwards – do you feel relaxed and energised? Or do you still feel sort of the same way?

 

Regardless of why you might be relaxing, it’s still incredibly important just as a way of providing self-care and rest for yourself. Trying to just deal with stress or overwhelming emotion can put us in a situation where you burn yourself out, and don’t have energy to look after yourself and cope in a healthy way.

 

So when it comes to relaxing vs distracting, is it easy to tell? Not always, and it doesn’t help that the two can be part of the same activity. You might also start out distracted and move into relaxation, just because you’re not being productive at all. And then you have procrastination, which can sometimes be mistaken for distraction. So perhaps we all have plenty to learn about the differences between relaxation and distraction (and procrastination!)

 

When it comes to techniques, just distracting ourselves is the tip of the iceberg. Distraction can be useful for taking our minds off something stressful and giving us a little breathing space. They can be useful for coping with intense feelings, especially of self-harm or suicide. They can also be great to stay calm before a stressful event.

 

It is definitely possible to relax or distract too much though, and it often comes down to using relaxation as an avoidance strategy, without actually thinking about how to approach a problem. In the end, you just become even more stressed than you were before! How to tell when you’re procrastinating? Answer: it takes time. Taking time out to reflect on how you use relaxation and distraction, and when you tend to procrastinate can give you the tools to figure out which situation is which, and how to cope in a healthier way.

 

So let’s review: self-understanding can go a long way to help us relax and distract in a healthy way. Give yourself time to work, time to relax, and time left over for anything else that crops up unexpectedly.

 

Thanks so much to everyone who came out, and to the excellent @stonepixie and @Ben-RO!! Hope you enjoyed this discussion as I did, and have a great night!!

originally posted on 02-05-2016 10:00 PM

Thanks @safari93 for being a super awesome co-facilitator!

To everyone else, you are equally as awesome! Hope you guys have an amazing week and I'll catch y'all when I'm next online.

My entire life can be described in one sentence: It didn't go as planned and that's okay. ツ
redhead
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:53 PM

So how do we get the rest and relaxation we need to keep our brains ticking over while also tackling the tricky stuff that life throws our way?
As I mentioned in the previous question, know yourself. Allow yourself time to relax and distract, and give yourself time to focus on what you need to do. Be mindful and bring balance.
===========================
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
-Icon for Hire
safari93
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:51 PM

So how do we get the rest and relaxation we need to keep our brains ticking over while also tackling the tricky stuff that life throws our way?

 

I think we've sort of answered it by saying that understanding yourself can go a long way. For someone like me who tends to overcommit, scheduling can be really useful, as well as understanding which activities tend to be more relaxation-focused and which are more distraction-focused. And of course, when to use them

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:56 PM

So how do we get the rest and relaxation we need to keep our brains ticking over while also tackling the tricky stuff that life throws our way?

 

Know yourself and your limits. Don't over-do it. Allow yourself some time to reflect when you are in a better head space.


My entire life can be described in one sentence: It didn't go as planned and that's okay. ツ
safari93
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:45 PM

@stonepixie I work like that as well - I take in information and process it for a while before putting it into a proper assessment. Although in that instance you aren't ~technically~ procrastinating, it seems more like most of the work is happening out of sight of others, and so it looks like procrastination. Besides, you're doing what works for you!

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:48 PM

Time for our last question of the night. We have sort of touched on this already but here it goes anyway!

 

So how do we get the rest and relaxation we need to keep our brains ticking over while also tackling the tricky stuff that life throws our way?


My entire life can be described in one sentence: It didn't go as planned and that's okay. ツ

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:53 PM

 

So how do we get the rest and relaxation we need to keep our brains ticking over while also tackling the tricky stuff that life throws our way?

 

 

Plan ahead, leave a little wiggle room. These are the two things that make the most difference for me. I plan ahead by making time for me to chill out and recharge. And I live a little wiggle room in my life too, by which i mean, time where i just don't plan to do stuff. Because life will always give you lemons, so you should always have a bit of spare time to make lemonade with them!

safari93
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:43 PM

@Ben-RO I would think that reflecting when you're in a good headspace is usually helpful, especially when it comes to relaxation and distraction vs procrastination. In the future, you're not so likely to end up procrastinating to a point where your mental health is worse than before

safari93
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:38 PM

@redhead true, and it's a much heathier way of coping than to distract all the time or not at all

redhead
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:35 PM

Do you think sometimes we relax or distract a little too much? Do you have any advice or thoughts about knowing when when relaxation is turning into procrastination?
I think it is possible to distract too much. Sometimes I'll do anything not to deal with something and it ends up making the problem bigger. I think know yourself and your triggers go a long way into learning when distraction goes too far.
===========================
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
-Icon for Hire
redhead
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:32 PM

@stonepixie same here lol
===========================
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
-Icon for Hire
safari93
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:32 PM

Anyways, speaking of distracting techniques:

 

Do you think sometimes we relax or distract a little too much? Do you have any advice or thoughts about knowing when when relaxation is turning into procrastination?

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:42 PM

Do you think sometimes we relax or distract a little too much? Do you have any advice or thoughts about knowing when when relaxation is turning into procrastination?

 

Hmm ... I don't know. This is a difficult one to answer. I'm always told that I am a procrastinator because I usually do my assessments in one sitting. Which people find completely mad!

 

But what they don't realise is that I know how my brain works. I read the questions, go away and do stuff, some research and what not, but mainly relaxation stuff. Whilst I am doing all this, my brain is piecing together the answers so as when it comes time to do the assessment, I can just smash it out.

 

But I guess when relaxation turns to procrastination would be when I am no longer relaxing and start worrying.


My entire life can be described in one sentence: It didn't go as planned and that's okay. ツ

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:48 PM

So much yas to that respones @stonepixie! I am also someone who is better doing everything at once! I guess with this stuff, knowing yourself and what's good for you is the tricky and also most important part. 

safari93
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:31 PM

@Ben-RO it's a good question to ask though when you are distracting yourself - what exactly are you distracting yourself from?

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:36 PM

@Ben-RO and @safari93 I often go back over what the underlying issue is when I am in a better head space. Doing so definitely helps me in the long run.

My entire life can be described in one sentence: It didn't go as planned and that's okay. ツ

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:41 PM

Know yourself (@redhead) and look back when you're in a better head space (@stonepixie). I like these two answers a lot.

 

So it's all good to distract, as long as you reflect on what happened later?

 

And if you know yourself well enough, you get the hang of noticing when you might be using distraction for procrastination? 

safari93
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:28 PM

@stonepixie I think this is one of those situations where distraction is easier than relaxation for me, since I can't relax well when something is coming up. I just line up a bunch of youtube videos or TV episodes till I have to face the music

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:31 PM

I have to be in the right mood to be distracted by tv shows, otherwise I am too distracted to watch them. Hahaha

My entire life can be described in one sentence: It didn't go as planned and that's okay. ツ
safari93
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:27 PM

@FootyFan26 it can definitely be hard when your techniques don't work out the way they should, but hopefully you can try some new ones from this discussion! Plus there's always the 1000001 COPING STRATEGIES & DISTRACTIONS thread (lol sorry for shouting)

safari93
Uber contributor

originally posted on 02-05-2016 9:22 PM

@redhead this is true, sometimes just forcing ourselves to deal with stress or overwhelming emotion is more exhausting than giving ourselves a break from it