[CHAT] The ABCs of LGBT
There are so many ways in which people have realized their LGBT identity. Maybe you’ve known your whole life. Maybe you didn’t realise it was a thing until you found out about that identity. Or maybe it was a celebrity or character in your favourite movie/TV show who gave you those special feelings. Either way, LGBT identity is as diverse as the many ways in which people come out.
And yet, why can it be such a struggle to know who you are? It only takes one bite to figure out whether you’re a fan of coriander, or a few classes to figure out which school subjects you naturally excel at. So why can it take years, decades even, to figure out where on the LGBT spectrum you sit?
Figuring out your LGBT identity isn’t always as simple as deciding on your favourite flavours or school subjects. For one, not everyone has the most straightforward journey. Plenty of people may identify with different labels before settling on one permanently, and some might not want to label themselves altogether. Others might spend most of their lives not realizing until they have that mental breakthrough.
However sure (or unsure) you might be in your sexual or gender identity, having a community or a space to talk about it can be so helpful, and not just for figuring out where you sit on the LGBT spectrum! Considering that LGBT young people have some of the worst rates of mental health among their peers, helping the LGBT community feel safe and accepted is something we all should work towards, regardless of how we identify.
That’s why we’re opening up a GR session on gender and sexual identity! Regardless of whether you’re 100% sure or 5% sure in your sexual identity, come and join us at 8pm AEST on Monday the 25th of July to talk about the ins and outs of being LGBT
I think maybe the reason that I'm kind of iffy about the idea that sexualities can change is because it's the theory behind so called gay "conversion" therapy. Awful stuff.
@lokifish I didn't ever connect those two ideas before, but I can definitely see where you're coming from. I agree that the idea that sexuality can 'be changed' is pretty loaded with homophobic history, but is is distinct to the idea that sexuality 'can change?'
@lokifish I can see where you're coming form with that, I think the difference between fluidity being used in a good way and fluidity being used in a bad way is whether the choice comes from the person themselves or an outside source.
@Chessca_H @lokifish @DruidChild something i wonder is where does the need to name identity come from? Is it something society does to label different individuals? Or is part of defining our identity, the need to have a name?
I think it's a bit of both @Ben-RO. I know for me it's important to have names for things/concepts/views that I identify with, but other people can find that they're too restrictive
Finding out you sexuality or gender isn’t always a straightforward experience; some people figure it out right away while for other people it can take years! Why do you think the process of coming out can be so different for different people?
People develop emotionally at different rates – sometimes it takes a while to learn to ask yourself those questions. Stigma is probably also a huge part – people can stay in denial because they don’t want to face the social consequences which is really sad 😞
@Ben-RO I think partially it can come from wanting a community, maybe? I saw a cool thing on the Internet and it said 'labels are for jars, and queer kids who want to feel like they're not alone.'
That's brilliant @DruidChild! I like this quote a lot and will probably steal it if that's okay 😛
So if society was more accepting and inclusive would we search as hard as we do for a label? Not sure if just human nature or social construct!
So many interesting points of view, awesome stuff! Time for the next question:
Finding out you sexuality or gender isn’t always a straightforward experience; some people figure it out right away while for other people it can take years! Why do you think the process of coming out can be so different for different people?
I think so many things come into consideration, some people don't realize that they have any options other then what they are born with or what their parents have raised them with. Things like relligion can come into play where people are ashamed to explore other options.
Some people just don't realize why they are unhappy.
@Chessca_H Yeah I agree 🙂 I think it's important to make that distinction between identities that we choose for ourselves and those that are thrust upon us by others
Heyhey everyone!! Welcome to tonight’s GR session on the ABCs of LGBT! @Chessca_H , @Ben-RO and myself will be facilitating this discussion tonight about anything and everything LGBT.
Before we jump right in, take a look at our Community Guidelines if you haven’t already, and if things get a bit intense for you, check out our Emergency Help resources.
Anyways let's goooooooo!
So we know that different genders and sexualities sit on a spectrum, rather than just being one or the other, but do you think that they can be fluid or do they stay the same over time?
I think it can change over time for some people, and for others it can stay the same
I think they can of course change over time, both sexualities and genders. I don't question that at all.
Hey everyone, really looking forward to tonight's chat!
So we know that different genders and sexualities sit on a spectrum, rather than just being one or the other, but do you think that they can be fluid or do they stay the same over time?
I used to think that you found your sexuality or gender and that was that whe I was younger, but as time goes on I learn about more and more experience where that isn't the case. Doesn't mean some people don't stay with the same identity, but there are a lot of people who don't.
