Friends and Friendships
Hey everyone!
Lahna here 🙂 Hope you're all getting ready for the next GR session!
A good friend is someone who knows all about you, but still loves you! They help us through days when we aren’t feeling so great, make us laugh, cry, keep our secrets, get us out of sticky situations and are just there when we need them most. As you’ve probably guessed, next Monday’s GR is all about friends!
But what happens when a friend doesn’t live up to the expectations we had of them? Handling changes in friendships can be hard. How do you get friends, and keep them? How about handling conflict with your buddy?
It can be tough, but we all need a friend to lean on at times.
Join us 8pm AEST on Monday (6th June) for a chat about everything friends!
@PeanutJelly148 makes perfect sense! Sometimes it can be easier to communicate from a computer or phone than in person. It can take a lot of pressure off trying not to be awkward
@PeanutJelly148 nothing like tagging your friends in Facebook memes to really set off a friendship 
But it seems like you do have some strategies to make friends! Social media can definitely make befriending someone easier, and it seems like you know how to use it to your advantage!
Social media is a huge help, I dont think i'll have any friends if i didnt have social media. 😄
using socail media helps me overcome my shyness, and shows my real personality... if that made sense
How do you go about befriending someone?
I usually try to talk to someone till we both feel comfortable adding each other on Facebook or Whatsapp or some other social media, and then between the first meeting and the next I'll talk over social media and get to know the person better. It also helps for any next coffee date to know what common interests you both have
So now that we've gone through the challenges of making friends, let's think about how to make them:
How do you go about befriending someone?
How do you go about befriending someone?
find common interests, start talking, till eventually you talk more often and it becomes a friendship. with all that facebook tagging and poking wars. 😛
How do you go about befriending someone?
I guess I just have some smalltalk and then keep doing that everytime I see the person, and then eventually maybe over a matter of weeks ask the person if they want to hang out or get coffee or something 🙂
@Ben-RO I do struggle sometimes, and I overthink how to approach someone a lot. Honestly the approach that works best for me is to talk over social media first - that way you've had a chance to know the other person a bit better before meeting them in person. Otherwise, just making friends in a social group where everyone is mingling makes it easier to start a conversation with someone new, like a house party or a new class you're starting
How do you think making friends is challenging?
I think that if you're already an anxious or shy person, making friends can be so hard since you worry about what the other person thinks of you and if they even consider you a good person to be friends with. For me, I'm not very talkative except about specific topics, and I worry that I'll come across as boring or uninterested if I can't keep up a conversation with someone
How do you think making friends is challenging?
Making friends is challenging as you may have expectations of what it's going to be like, these could be scary like omg they'll hate me or they might be oh great they'll think I'm awesome and it can be hard when these don't go how you hope.
Does anyone else have trouble approaching people? What do you do about it?
@Lahna Yeah i hace thought about that.
I have a very difficult time approaching people, so unfortunatly i avoid it, as much as possible, even people approaching me i get nervous.
So having friends can require some effort, but what about making friends?
How do you think making friends is challenging?
How do you think making friends is challenging?
I guess fear of rejection plays a big part in making friends. `
It's definitaly a fine balance @j95.
@Ben-RO I suppose I sort of start out with small talk and then everytime I see them ask how things are going and then eventually ask if they want to grab a coffee or something. So I guess I avoid the whole going from a stranger to best friends thing. It's different for everyone though and depends on where you're making friends, is it UNI, work, school, sports practice, online etc...
How do you think making friends is challenging?
for me personally its because i cant make friends, i cant be the one to go up to the other person.
Other reasons could be because you may not know this person, so making friends you could have nothing in common so its difficult to find common ground to start talking ect. Other reasons could include being shy, so making friends is difficult.
Hey @PeanutJelly148,
It sounds like making friends is something you really struggle with. Have you ever thought that other people might be just as shy as you?
How do you think making friends is challenging?
I think making friends can be super challenging. It can be really daunting especially if you're worried that they won't want to be your frined for some reason (I always have this little bit of doubt in my head saying "what if they don't like me"?) but when you think that they are probably as nervous about approaching you to be their friend, it makes it all seem less daunting. 🙂
How do you think making friends is challenging?
It's hard to meet people, it's hard to tell whether or not they want to be your friend and it takes a while to grow something into a friendship too!
@PeanutJelly148 I'm sorry to hear that! We will get to talk about how to cope with conflict in friendships tonight, so stay tuned!
It looks like one of the recurring themes here is respect! Treating people the way you would want to be treated, being understanding of boundaries and accepting of their identities and experiences are things we should consider when we interact with others in general, but in friendships it seems like you can't develop a strong and caring relationship without being respectful in all the many ways that are possible
